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-   -   I'm 14, I need help, I think I'm pregnant. (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=781967)

  • Jan 20, 2014, 04:42 PM
    chelseyboo142
    I'm 14, I need help, I think I'm pregnant.
    OK well, I'm 14 years old soon to be 15. I was on the depo provera shot and got off it. Now I'm taking birth control pills. I forget sometimes so I take them at different times but on the right day. When I got off the shot I didn't get on the pill for a few days and I had unprotected sex, this was like 4 weeks ago I got off the shot. 2 weeks ago I got on the pills so I had no protection for 2 weeks, and lately my vagina has been getting pains and my unterus feels very tight and hard and my belly looks bloated and when I stand up I get light headed a lot, but my lower abdomen has been getting some pains as well as my back, and I have this weird taste in my mouth and I get nausea but do not throw up. Do you think you could be pregnant?
  • Jan 20, 2014, 04:47 PM
    Alty
    Yes, pregnancy is possible.

    The only way to diagnose pregnancy is with a urine test, a blood test, an ultrasound during later pregnancy, or giving birth.

    Have you tried a pregnancy test?
  • Jan 20, 2014, 04:49 PM
    chelseyboo142
    No but I should proubly do that
  • Jan 20, 2014, 04:52 PM
    Alty
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by chelseyboo142 View Post
    No but I should proubly do that

    That would be the next step.
  • Jan 20, 2014, 05:02 PM
    chelseyboo142
    I'm scared tho:( I don't know how to tell me mom
  • Jan 20, 2014, 05:12 PM
    J_9
    Chelsey, when you play grown up games you have to be prepared for the consequences. Telling your mom is just one of those consequences. She will be upset, of course, but she will get over it.
  • Jan 20, 2014, 05:18 PM
    Alty
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by chelseyboo142 View Post
    I'm scared tho:( I don't know how to tell me mom

    You had sex, now you think you might be pregnant. Obviously you knew that sex causes pregnancy. Instead of avoiding that risk, you had sex anyway. There's a reason why adults tell kids to abstain from sex, and this is it. I have yet to meet a child that is ready to be a parent.

    There's an old saying "you made your bed, now you have to lay in it". You played adult games, and that means you have to face the adult consequences. Telling your mom about this is the least of your worries if you are in fact pregnant.

    Sorry to be harsh, but that's reality. Welcome to being an adult, even though you're a child.
  • Jan 20, 2014, 05:22 PM
    chelseyboo142
    I knew what I was getting myself into when I did but luckily me and my boyfriend have been together for 10 months and he is very supportive,but my mom has threatened to send me somewhere if I got pregnant.where could she possibly send me though?
  • Jan 20, 2014, 05:31 PM
    J_9
    You have only been together 10 months. To a 14 year old like yourself, that is a lifetime. In reality it is but a drop in the bucket and not nearly enough time to form a real relationship.

    He he is supportive now, but if you are pregnant his tune will change when friends and family put ideas in his head. Ideas like he may not be the father. It will happen, I can promise you that.

    Where your mother send you is her choice. She could send you off to live with relatives. She could send you to a home for unwed mothers. Only she knows what her plans are if this is the case.
  • Jan 20, 2014, 05:35 PM
    Alty
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by chelseyboo142 View Post
    I knew what I was getting myself into when I did but luckily me and my boyfriend have been together for 10 months and he is very supportive,but my mom has threatened to send me somewhere if I got pregnant.where could she possibly send me though?

    She could send you to boarding school, to a sanitarium, to relatives, put you in foster care. Lost of possibilities.

    Oh, 10 months. That's forever! I'm sure he'll be around forever, and he'll drop out of school, find a great job (even though people with college degrees are having trouble finding work) and he'll support you and the baby. You can get a nice little house, and live happily ever after, and you can watch the pigs fly by while you're living in your dream world.

    But really, let's talk reality. As soon as you find out you're pregnant, he'll be gone. Good luck getting child support. If he's the same age you are, he'll have a very hard time finding a job. Even if he does, it will only be part time since he's still in school. It's more likely that you'll never see a penny from him, and he won't have anything to do with you, or his kid. So be prepared that you'll likely be raising this baby on your own. Not easy to do, even for an adult with a college degree and a good job.

    Your mommy is going to have to bail you out. She'll have to take on the financial burden of a child she didn't want, all because you wanted to play grownup games.

    If you want to be an adult, live an adult life, then act like an adult.
  • Jan 20, 2014, 05:36 PM
    chelseyboo142
    Your right:(

    Ok

    Any advice for a possible teen mom? Please don't be rude.
  • Jan 20, 2014, 05:50 PM
    Alty
    Look at your options, abortion, adoption, and keeping your baby. Tell your parents. Make sure you have good prenatal care if you decide to carry the baby to term. Be prepared that most teen moms have complications during pregnancy, and birth, as do their babies. It can cost $12,000 plus to deliver a baby in the US, and that's if there aren't any life threatening complications.

    If you decide to keep your baby, get a good job. Babies aren't cheap. You will need at least $1000 a month just for supplies and doctors visits, and that's if the baby is healthy and you're living expenses are covered by someone else.
  • Jan 20, 2014, 05:52 PM
    Homegirl 50
    Let's hope you are not pregnant and if you're not stop having sex. You are nowhere near equipped for motherhood.

    If you are you are going to need the support of not only the father but the both your parents. Stay in school for as long as you can,
    learn as much as you can about the care of a child, make sure you are getting financial support from the father
    and stay away from sex until you are a working adult.
  • Jan 20, 2014, 05:52 PM
    J_9
    Don't put the cart before the horse. Find out if you are pregnant first.
  • Jan 20, 2014, 06:06 PM
    chelseyboo142
    All right.thanks.
  • Jan 20, 2014, 06:37 PM
    ScottGem
    There is another issue here that has to be mentioned. At 14 you are probably under the legal age of consent. That means your boyfriend could be facing statutory rape charges, jail and a permanent sex offender status. All because you thought you were grown up enough. I'm curious as to why you were on birth control in the first place.

    You haven't told us the timing here. When did you have this sexual encounter? When was your last period when were you due?
  • Jan 20, 2014, 06:39 PM
    Fr_Chuck
    Also, no one has asked, if she has missed her period, and if so, how many weeks late. You have to have missed your period, and be two week late before you do the pregnancy test.

    Also do it first thing in the morning , first urine of the day
  • Jan 20, 2014, 06:40 PM
    Alty
    Good question Scott. I doubt very much that a 14 year old got the depo provera shot and then the pill, without her mother knowing. The only reason to be on that shot is to prevent pregnancy. So mommy must know that her daughter is sexually active. If not, who paid for the shot,and the pills?

    I just assumed the boyfriend was the same age. I should know better than to assume.

    So how old is the boyfriend?
  • Jan 20, 2014, 06:47 PM
    chelseyboo142
    My mother got me the shot as well as the pills,in the shot I had not period and the nurse said that when I started the pills I should start my period back but I just spotted a few times a week ago for a day and that's it


    He is 16, but I'm almost 15
  • Jan 20, 2014, 06:50 PM
    J_9
    If your mother got you the shot, she should know you are sexually active. Why, then, is possible pregnancy so hard to discuss with her?

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