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-   -   Mixed Messages (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=77776)

  • Mar 31, 2007, 10:18 AM
    brew49411
    Mixed Messages
    I have been on a rollercoaster ride with my girl for the last month. We have been back and forth between together and not together. Last week she told me that she didn't want to have a serious relationship right now. She wanted to be able to see other guys. What else can could I do but say OK. I let her go and as soon as she saw me with another girl, she got really irratated. I know that she has been hanging out with other guys, so what's the big deal? I don't want to move on, but I will if I have to... It gets better! Last night I invited a friend to go out to a comedy club. She is female and a mutual friend of mine and my (somewhat) girl. Before I could call in the reservation, my friend tells me that Elizabeth, (my somewhat girlfriend), wants to come too. I say OK. Its not like it was a date or anything. We go out and Elizabeth is being moody and moping around the whole time. She smiled at me a few times but that's about it. While we were there she put her phone on the table so everybody could see when she would get a text message. Me, wanting to fight fire with fire, did the same. Apparently both of us have people that want to hook up with us. Needless to say I could tell every time mine would go off it bothered her. She would grab her phone and act like she was checking to see if she had a message too. I know this was childish, but she wants to play games, so I played too. As we were walking out she made reference to the person that just so happened to be the girl that was texting me. I think she was checking to see how I reacted. I haven't called her in about 3 days, and don't plan on it either. I didn't plan on inviting her to the show, I was glad she wanted to go, but why would she want to be around me if she wants to see other guys? Does this mean she still wants me? Am I wrong to think that I should let her come back to me? How do I handle this??
  • Mar 31, 2007, 10:36 AM
    talaniman
    For one thing, good honest communication is the way to go, not trying to match games. Her issues are her own and you need to call a truce, and get this out in the open. I really don't think either of you is ready to cut the other loose, so its time you learned the art of openly expressing yourselves and the skill of listening. Do this as soon as possible, and remember, some problems cannot be solved in a day, and back off when things start to go down hill, and avoid any name calling or yelling. No communications, no relationship!!

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