Ask Me Help Desk

Ask Me Help Desk (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forum.php)
-   Dating (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forumdisplay.php?f=374)
-   -   I'm a bit concerned about my boyfriend drinking lately what to do? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=774985)

  • Nov 12, 2013, 08:08 PM
    sweetpie88
    I'm a bit concerned about my boyfriend drinking lately what to do?
    I been with my boyfriend for a month now and the feelings for each other are mutual. Lately he's been drinking not around me but he has told me about it. I'm worried and concerned about his well being and I don't know if he has some issues going on with him. The 2 times he came to see me he was drunk and we were in public and he acted all loud and crazy and didn't even remember what happened. I do and I don't want to leave him and I hope he gets better since there has been a day or so when he didn't drink. I want to in a few months introduce him to family and friends, not like this. I haven't even told friends what is going on.
  • Nov 12, 2013, 09:24 PM
    Homegirl 50
    Why would you tell your friends?
    Tell him not to come around you when he's drunk and if it continues you see no future for you two. How old are you two?
  • Nov 12, 2013, 09:49 PM
    sweetpie88
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Homegirl 50 View Post
    Why would you tell your friends?
    Tell him not to come around you when he's drunk and if it continues you see no future for you two. How old are you two?

    I'm 25 and he is 27.
  • Nov 13, 2013, 01:02 AM
    Alty
    So in the month you've been dating he's only been sober for a day or two?

    Quote:

    there has been a day or so when he didn't drink
    Quote:

    I do and I don't want to leave him and I hope he gets better
    This relationship is only a month old. In this stage of the dating game you're usually on your best behavior, trying to impress your prospective mate. If this is how he's acting now it's only going to get worse down the road, when he's able to be himself and stop putting on a show to impress you, which he hasn't done.

    After only a month you have nothing invested in this relationship. Leave now and save yourself the trouble. This isn't going to get better. You either accept him the way he is, or you leave. You won't change him, so if that's what you're hoping will happen, you're fooling yourself.

    Good luck.
  • Nov 13, 2013, 05:08 AM
    Homegirl 50
    Good points Alty. If he has only been sober a couple of times in the month you've been with him, this is who he Is. I would not have stayed around that long.
  • Nov 13, 2013, 09:04 AM
    sweetpie88
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Alty View Post
    So in the month you've been dating he's only been sober for a day or two?





    This relationship is only a month old. In this stage of the dating game you're usually on your best behavior, trying to impress your prospective mate. If this is how he's acting now it's only going to get worse down the road, when he's able to be himself and stop putting on a show to impress you, which he hasn't done.

    After only a month you have nothing invested in this relationship. Leave now and save yourself the trouble. This isn't going to get better. You either accept him the way he is, or you leave. You won't change him, so if that's what you're hoping will happen, you're fooling yourself.

    Good luck.

    I think you're right :/ Yes that I know of he been sober for a day or two and I'm just assuming, it might have been more than that. I only know what he be been telling me.
  • Nov 13, 2013, 11:57 AM
    talaniman
    Hope this isn't the guy in your last post, but you cannot ignore his bad habits and behavior in the first month. Hoping he gets better is a bit naïve too, since he should be on his BEST behavior NOW.

    Maybe you are being warned that it can get worse.
  • Nov 14, 2013, 12:58 AM
    sweetpie88
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by talaniman View Post
    Hope this isn't the guy in your last post, but you cannot ignore his bad habits and behavior in the first month. Hoping he gets better is a bit naïve too, since he should be on his BEST behavior NOW.

    Maybe you are being warned that it can get worse.

    Nope this is a different guy. Everyone here is right, as hard as it is for me to do I have to leave. I do not know why it's hard for me to do. I have some feelings for him.

  • All times are GMT -7. The time now is 08:49 PM.