Ask Me Help Desk - I broke up with girlfriend and she had sex. Don't know what to think.

I broke up with girlfriend and she had sex. Don't know what to think.

So please help me. I left my grilfriend twice. First time it was after about 7 months we were together, then passed two months and I realized I really miss her. She forgive me. Then after two months I left her again, and I said I don't love her, we can be just friends. We will not be together anymore and so on. She really cried in both break ups, and after two months she had sex with that other guy.

I realized that I really love her and now she, broke up with that guy and came back with me again. Is it normal that she had sex with that guy? She says that she loves me no matter what I said. I know that I said really hurtful things.

What should I need to do now? Do I need to forget that because I don't know why I feel a little bit like she cheated me although technically we were broken up. Shoud I forgive her or something is wrong with my EGO?

"something is wrong with my EGO?" Yes definitely.

You don't own her, she was free to do whatever she wanted to do with whomever she wanted to do it with, and there is nothing for you to forgive.

Maybe you should lose the drama and stop playing the games. Decide if you really want to be with this girl or not. You know a relationship without the drama is so much better.

How do you think does she love me ? Do I deserve her , or her me?

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Originally Posted by frank1323

How do you think does she love me ? Do I deserve her , or her me?

Lemme see. You dumped her twice and she cried both times, was very upset. It sounds like you don't love and "deserve" her at all. She would be smart to move on in her life without someone as fickle and even as mean as you seem to be.

Leave her alone and work on your issues with ego. Learn how to be kind and empathetic.

I know I dumped her twice for no reason , then why did she cried and wanned me back , altought I was such and jerk?

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Originally Posted by frank1323

I know I dumped her twice for no reason , then why did she cried and wanned me back , altought I was such and jerk?

She must have thought there was hope for you to become human. Crazy girl!

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Originally Posted by Wondergirl

She must have thought there was hope for you to become human. Crazy girl!

Don't know ,maybe she loves me?

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Originally Posted by frank1323

Don't know ,maybe she loves me?

I sure hope not, not any more! You've knocked yourself out breaking her spirit and smashing her dreams. And I'm guessing you would dump her a third time if she gave you another chance (which I hope she doesn't).

She said she loves me and wants to give me a chance !

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Originally Posted by frank1323

She said she loves me and wants to give me a chance !

Nooooooooooooooo!! She's already given you two.

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Originally Posted by Wondergirl

Nooooooooooooooo!! She's already given you two.

Yes she dumped that guy , do I deserve her?

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Originally Posted by frank1323

Yes she dumped that guy , do I deserve her?

Absolutely not!

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Originally Posted by Wondergirl

Absolutely not!

I think I can change ,but why do I feel like she cheated me?

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So please help me , I left my grilfriend twice first time it was after about 7months we were together , then passed two months and I realized I really miss her ,she forgive me , then after two months I left her again , and I said I don't love her , we can be just friends , we will not be together anymore and so on , she really cried in both break ups , and after two months she had sex with that other guy , I realized that I really love her and now she ,broke up with that guy and came back with me again , is it normal that she had sex with that guy , she says that she loves me no matter what I said , I know that I said really hurtful things , what should I need to do now , do I need to forget that ,because I don't know why I feel a little bit like she cheated me , although technically we were broken up. Shoud I forgive her or something is wrong with my EGO?

She has done nothing to be forgiven for. What she did while you were not a couple is none of your business. You told her that it was over. It means she was free to do whatever she wanted without caring about what you might think. She did not in any way, shape or form 'cheat' on you and you were broken up not 'technically' broken up.

Focusing on her supposed transgressions is a way to alleviate your own guilt at the way you have treated her. Stop making this about her behavior and focus on your own. Have you made the changes necessary to keep you from dumping her again? Have you worked through whatever issues you had that convinced you that you were not in love with her and started the yo-yo relationship?

She may love you but that doesn't mean she should be in a relationship with you. You seem to care about her only after you destroy her life. Love isn't enough by itself to overcome all obstacles in a relationship. Trust is very important too. Can she trust you? Should she trust you? What have you done to rebuild the trust?

Sorry but this is really dumb. You're not sure if you want her or not. You break up with her, then go back with her by begging her to give you another chance. Then you break her heart again and tell her all this mean stuff about not loving her and whatever, so she moves on with her life. Yes, it's normal that when you break up with someone, they will move on and date someone else. If that couple so desires, whether you and I think they should or not, they might decide to become intimate and it's really none of our business. What your much-abused girlfriend in this ridiculously immature relationship does or did when she's not dating you is none of your business.

It's totally unfair to toy with someone's emotions and abuse their trust the way you have done to her, then criticize if she maybe doesn't make the best decisions in a next relationship. Perhaps if you had left the girl alone from the start and never dated her at all, she'd know to wait longer to get involved sexually. Messing with people does impact their decision making in these situations.

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Originally Posted by frank1323

I think I can change ,but why do I feel like she cheated me?

Because of your huge ego. She's didn't cheat on you.

Change FIRST and PERMANENTLY, then try a third time with her.

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Originally Posted by frank1323

I think I can change ,but why do I feel like she cheated me?

First you think you can change? This is your third chance if I were her I would've moved on after the first time you broke up with me and she didn't cheat on you, you two weren't dating she was free to do as she wished.

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Originally Posted by Wondergirl

Because of your huge ego. She's didn't cheat on you.

Change FIRST and PERMANENTLY, then try a third time with her.

Ok I can try , do I deserve her?

How many times are you going to ask if you deserve her? NO, you don't. You sound about 15 years old. How old are you?

If you don't deserve someone, but that someone takes you back anyway, then you PROVE your worth by CHANGING your selfish ways.

Love is respect, admiration, tenderness - and compromise. When you have an argument, you hold your breath and sit down and talk together. You do it because you want to stay together, and because you care about each other.

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Originally Posted by joypulv

How many times are you going to ask if you deserve her? NO, you don't. You sound about 15 years old. How old are you?

If you don't deserve someone, but that someone takes you back anyway, then you PROVE your worth by CHANGING your selfish ways.

Love is respect, admiration, tenderness - and compromise. When you have an argument, you hold your breath and sit down and talk together. You do it because you want to stay together, and because you care about each other.

I am 20 years old ,I don't know why am I so egoistical... that's why I am asking