Ask Me Help Desk - Should I meet this man?

Should I meet this man?

I been chatting to a man on a mobile dating site and so far we have everything in common. The problem is he is moving way too fast and we been chatting only for 5 days. He already called me my love, future wife and says he will show me love. He says he believes in love at first sight but I don't. I did tell I want to I want to take things slow and that he making me uncomfortable. So far he has stopped and I'm a bit skeptical about him and I do not want to get hurt like I did in the past.

Sounds like either a scam or someone looking for a quick, temporary physical relationship.. or worse. You can NEVER really know someone when communicating by chat/email only; it's too easy to put on a personality. Meeting someone face to face is the only way. That way you can see if they really are who they portent to be.

A few things come to mind...

Player
Con Artist
Liar
Broke
Many women on the side
Etc, etc, etc.

It is easy to say those things on the internet. He is hoping to play with your emotions so that he can have access to your purse strings. Be very cautious on everything and anything. If I heard those things he was saying right off the bat I would think he has bad motives planned and usually those involve getting to your monies.

Does he live in the same country? Sounds like either a scammrr or someone you won't be able to get rid of easily.

Quote:

Originally Posted by N0help4u

Does he live in the same country? Sounds like either a scammrr or someone you won't be able to get rid of easily.

Yeah he lives near by me. He works and told me where her works not the name of the place but the street.

I would just be cautious. Someone that is willing to start talking like that after only 5 days may have other ideas in mind. I mean, it is possible that he could just suddenly be infatuated but it is also just as likely that he is not who he appears... do you know what I am saying? I think you do because you were smart enough to ask about this.

Take it slow like you're doing and see what happens with it... but just be careful along the way.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Oliver2011

A few things come to mind...

Player
Con Artist
Liar
Broke
Many women on the side
Etc, etc, etc.

It is easy to say those things on the internet. He is hoping to play with your emotions so that he can have access to your purse strings. Be very cautious on everything and anything. If I heard those things he was saying right off the bat I would think he has bad motives planned and usually those involve getting to your monies.

I will be extra careful, I haven't given him my number yet before I do though I'm going to chat with him on skype

Quote:

Originally Posted by sweetpie88

I will be extra careful, I haven't given him my number yet before I do though I'm going to chat with him on skype

Also a big clue will be if the chat goes to money or money related things. You mentioned a street in your city. It is very easy if you mention what state or county you are in to look up a street. Stay on your guard. You don't need this drama in your life.

IF you do meet him have him meet you at a McDonalds on the other side of town. Only take as much money as you think you will need, plus a little more for emergency. Do not take credit cards. Do not give him more identifying information (address, phone #, work info,) than he already has.
If possible have a friend either go with you or be there acting like she doesn't know you. Then you can get an opinion from her observing him. You don't want him having enough information that he can track you down and become a royal pain in the butt.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Oliver2011

Also a big clue will be if the chat goes to money or money related things. You mentioned a street in your city. It is very easy if you mention what state or county you are in to look up a street. Stay on your guard. You don't need this drama in your life.

Thanks he never mentioned anything about money. Well he lives in the bronx, NY and I live not too far from there. He said he works at a supermarket on 34th street which I think is in Manhattan.

If you are feeling uncomfortable after only five days, I say pay attention to that feeling.
I'd stop contact with him. When someone starts talking love and marriage that fast, he's either full of crap or crazy. Say thanks but no thanks, then you don't have to worry about getting hurt.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Homegirl 50

If you are feeling uncomfortable after only five days, I say pay attention to that feeling.
I'd stop contact with him. When someone starts talking love and marriage that fast, he's either full of crap or crazy. Say thanks but no thanks, then you don't have to worry about getting hurt.

I totally agree.

It is the only way to stay safe (money, health, etc).

You are right,

Quote:

Originally Posted by Homegirl 50

If you are feeling uncomfortable after only five days, I say pay attention to that feeling.
I'd stop contact with him. When someone starts talking love and marriage that fast, he's either full of crap or crazy. Say thanks but no thanks, then you don't have to worry about getting hurt.

You're right. There has been times in the past when I have ignored my gut instincts and I think that's how I ended up getting hurt.

I learned the hard way listen to your gut NOT your brain nor your heart.

Quote:

Originally Posted by N0help4u

I learned the hard way listen to your gut NOT your brain nor your heart.

I decided to stop talking to him and continue to talk to another man who wasn't doing what this guy was. I will from now on trust my instincts

Quote:

Originally Posted by sweetpie88

I decided to stop talking to him and continue to talk to another man who wasn't doing what this guy was. I will from now on trust my instincts

That's the way to go. If your gut is telling you something isn't right, then listen to your gut. You don't owe anyone contact just because they've expressed their love for you, especially someone that does so after 5 days, when you've never met. It's just creepy.

Sounds to me like he's desperate for love, so much so that he'll take any girl that shows the least bit of interest in him. That's not good. I doubt he even knows very much about you, other than the fact that you're female, and on a dating site, so he has a chance.

Dumping him was the right choice in my opinion. :)

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alty

That's the way to go. If your gut is telling you something isn't right, then listen to your gut. You don't owe anyone contact just because they've expressed their love for you, especially someone that does so after 5 days, when you've never met. It's just creepy.

Sounds to me like he's desperate for love, so much so that he'll take any girl that shows the least bit of interest in him. That's not good. I doubt he even knows very much about you, other than the fact that you're female, and on a dating site, so he has a chance.

Dumping him was the right choice in my opinion. :)

Yep, it is creepy you just never know nowadays. Glad I made a good decision with all you guy's help!

This is not normal, yes most men will want to "meet" have coffee and talk. But future wife, sorry, I would have went no contact the minute they said that.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck

This is not normal, yes most men will want to "meet" have coffee and talk. But future wife, sorry, I would have went no contact the minute they said that.

Ditto. :)