Here is the situation. His ex filed for divorce 2 years ago. They agreed to have joint custody with her being the primary residence parent. I have kept a calendar for the past year ever since the divorce was finalized. She has turned lesbian and is now living with her mother. The youngest child which is 3 will have to share a room with his 2 year old cousin. She had bounced checks to the daycare so now my husband has to pay the daycare and give her $10 a month with makes up the amount in the paperwork. She has many women around the kids who spend the night when she had her own house. She will not keep the kids on the weekend most of the time so we watch them. We take them to their doctors appointments and we are there at all school events where she is not. I am also able to stay at home with the kids so they won't have to go to daycare. His oldest is six and she has said that she wants to live with us and see her mother. How would we go about getting full custody and what are our chances?

You have to go back to the divorce court and petititon for a change in the custody arrangements. If you can show that she has not been providing a good home you stand a good chance of gaining physycal custody.

Here is the situation. We live in Oklahoma. My husband has 2 kids a six year old and a three year old. My husbands ex filed for divorce almost 2 years ago. The divorce was finalized a year ago. They decided to have joint custody with his ex having primary residence. We have the kids every Wednesday overnight and every other weekend. Since the divorce his ex turned lesbian and brings multiple women around the kids that stay the night when the kids are there. She asks us to watch the kids for her at least one of the days on her weekend because she needs a break or she has to go to the bar. She has bounced checks to daycare so now my husband has to pay the daycare and give her the remaining amount to make up the difference in the divorce decree. She just moved in with her mother this weekend and the three year old will have to share a room at least one night a week with his two year old cousin. The six year old says that she wants to live with us and visit her mother. I am also able to stay at home with the kids so they wouldn't have to go to daycare. I just don't want to spend thousands of dollars if we do not have a good chance at winning in court.

Hello ashley:

In these matters, your chances equate to the quality of your lawyer and the depth of your bank account. There are no absolutes and you have as good a chance as anyone seeking custody.

Maybe somebody can advise you better. I don't know. In my own personal case, I spent until I couldn't spend anymore. How could I ever look my son in the eye and tell him that my savings were more important than he was? But, that's just me.

excon

Yes I don't really see much negative against the mother, there is no abuse, neglect, she is feeding them clothing them, and the such.

The issue with her sexual preference can't even be brought up and if it is, it will most likely make you look the worst, they will play you to be a bigot and narrow minded, remember in most places sexual preference has no bearing on adoption and custody.

You have the check things and the such, but I have seen a lot worst still get full custody, so I would say talk to your attorney, but it may well depend on the luck of the draw as to which judge you get to hear the case and if you can find any more info. It will be long and it will be costly and you will have to fight dirty, so any relaltionship you had with her before will be over before it happens

Well do you think that we have a good chance at keeping the joint custody and getting residence of the children. We really just want the children living mostly with us since she's not back on her feet yet and plans to stay living at her moms for awhile. Basically the roles would just be switched. She would have what we have now.

Its hard for us to judge without getting the full story from both sides. If you really want it then go after and don't worry about your chances.

Hello again, ashley:

I have a condition. I've been told that I can take several different paths to better health. They're all expensive. However, they won't work unless I see them to completion, and they may NOT work at all. Certainly, I don't want to invest the money unless I know the outcome. So, I do nothing.

But, this is my back. And, I can live with my back being the way it is.

You, on the other hand, are talking about your children. They'll be children for only a very short time, and then it'll be too late. By the way, what else are you earning money for, if not for your children? A boat? A nice relaxing retirement??

Let me say again, loudly, what I said before, and what everybody else here is saying too, albeit subtler than me: SPEND! HIRE THE BEST LAWYER YOU CAN FIND! THESE ARE YOUR CHILDREN!! Is a boat more important?

excon

I could not have said it better myself excon, in custody battles, no one knows what and how a judge will rule, sometimes they rule totally against common sense it appears. And each judge has their own things of interest they look at more than others, ( a local attorney should know these and know which buttoms to push in court)

People without attorneyes going into family court against an attorney seldom win, the odds are just stacked against you.

Hi Ashley2323. I'm From Canada Her Children's Lawyers Are Free For Them, I Don't Know If That Is The Case Where You Are But You Should Look In To It. It Can't Hurt. Does The Father Feel The Same Way You Do? Just Remember It's Not You It's For The Kids. I Hope I Helped. Good Luck!