Im 16, very young still I know before anyone points that out, but I have an incredibly depressing recurring thought that no girl that I like will ever like me back. I treat girls well I think, I show them the respect they deserve and try to help them whenever they need my help. I treat girls differently than I do to men because I believe it is man's duty to protect woman (call me cheesy or sexist). My problem is though whenever I seem to like a girl they just never like me back. Now I'm not an incredible ugly guy or anything, multiple girls have told me I'm goodlooking and what not, but when it comes to asking a girl out I keep getting rejected. I approach them by being myself and being.polite and respectful and try to show them love and care, but they just throw it back in my face. I see a lot of girls posting about how they want someone who will treat them right, I know I'm that guy who will treat them the way they want to, but for some reason or another they just don't seem to like me back when it comes to it... I just don't know what to do, my confidence is so low because of constant rejection from girls I like, my world is starting to revolve around girls and I'm just so depressed.

SO... you stop worrying about them because first... no girl you would be with now would likely still be around in a few years anyway.. statistically speaking... however how well you do in school WILL.

So worry about doing your best in school... and college if you go... and there will be plenty of time then... and the girls won't be as fixated on the dumb superficial stuff everyone your age right now tends to be. And we are talking only 4 or 5 more years... and its not that long... and the difference in the maturity levels is HUGE.

Yep make something of your life first and everything else will fall in place. I always tell my sons quality not quantity. As long as the right girl comes into your life at the right time that's what counts whether its when your 22 or 32.

Im sure your right, just finding it difficult to shrug off the idea that there's something off putting about me, I mean Im not some idiotic 11 or 12 year old, Im 16 going on 17 and mature enough to understand what a relationship needs, but its just so deflating to be rejected every time you ask a girl out

Watch girls body language and ask the ones that show interest, Often I see guys asking all the wrong girls. Girls that want bad boys, girls that are knock outs but stuck up, girls that are out of their league, girls that they don't have anything in common with.
Ask your friends what they've found girls look for in a guy. Ask some female friends what they find put offish about you. Tell them you need some constructive critique.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Waltond1997

Im sure your right, just finding it difficult to shrug off the idea that theres something off putting about me, I mean Im not some idiotic 11 or 12 year old, Im 16 going on 17 and mature enough to understand what a relationship needs, but its just so deflating to be rejected everytime you ask a girl out

---

Trust me... it would be an exceptionally rare 16 year old the really knows what a relationship should be... though most think they do.

And girls at your age are a distractrion... a HUGE distraction. One that is far more likely to hurt your future than help it right now.

I'm a guy... so I've been there... and there is a lot to be said about being a late bloomer. Good things.. not bad ones.

And if you are fixating on what you think wrong with you... then you really aren't ready yet to have one. Because when its right... its going to just happen... without a HUGE effort being involved to sucker the other person into believeing they are someone other than who they really are.

Seriously... keeping a relationship going for years takes a littl ework... but if they are right to begin with they don't take a lot of work to happen.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by N0help4u

watch girls body language and ask the ones that show interest, Often I see guys asking all the wrong girls. Girls that want bad boys, girls that are knock outs but stuck up, girls that are out of their league, girls that they don't have anything in common with.
Ask your friends what they've found girls look for in a guy. Ask some female friends what they find put offish about you. Tell them you need some constructive critique.

---

I will do that, thanks a lot for the feedback man, I've been desperately needing some, appreciate it

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by smoothy

Trust me....it would be an exceptionally rare 16 year old the really knows what a relationship should be....though most think they do.

And girls at your age are a distractrion...a HUGE distraction. One that is far more likely to hurt your future than help it right now.

I'm a guy...so I've been there...and there is a lot to be said about being a late bloomer. Good things..not bad ones.

And if you are fixating on what you think wrong with you...then you really aren't ready yet to have one. Because when its right ...its going to just happen...without a HUGE effort being involved to sucker the other person into believeing they are someone other than who they really are.

Seriously....keeping a relationship going for years takes a littl ework...but if they are right to begin with they don't take a lot of work to happen.

---

That's brilliant, so many things for me to take on board with but they're things I needed to hear, I know il be at University next year and if I can get one of those Engineering degrees then my dad has contacts to get me a good job (albeit il have to move away 4 hours from where I live now)... but I thank you for the feedback and for taking the time to answer with suggestions, you've been a class act, much appreciated

The cool thing about being 16 is that you have time on your side. You don't have to be in a relationship right now as there is no law against it. Sure most of us want to be in a relationship and most relationships are fun. But get away from the idea that you have to be in a relationship. Also if you force a relationship then the relationship will be doomed to fail. Let it happen naturally. There are probably several girls that appreciate the qualities that you have. You just have to find them. Focus on some other things for the time being, such as sports or school work. It will happen. You just have to let it.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Waltond1997

Thats brilliant, so many things for me to take on board with but they're things I needed to hear, I know il be at University next year and if I can get one of those Engineering degrees then my dad has contacts to get me a good job (albeit il have to move away 4 hours from where i live now).....but I thank you for the feedback and for taking the time to answer with suggestions, you've been a class act, much appreciated

---

THanks, and Trust me... women are way different at 22 (and even better in their late 20's) than they are at 16... you will be amazed at how much you yourself will change over the next few years... as well as everyone else... (you will see this in hindsight) .what you want after college will likely be very different than what you want right now... and that's normal.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Oliver2011

The cool thing about being 16 is that you have time on your side. You don't have to be in a relationship right now as there is no law against it. Sure most of us want to be in a relationship and most relationships are fun. But get away from the idea that you have to be in a relationship. Also if you force a relationship then the relationship will be doomed to fail. Let it happen naturally. There are probably several girls that appreciate the qualities that you have. You just have to find them. Focus on some other things for the time being, such as sports or school work. It will happen. You just have to let it.

---

Again that's a great read for me and I think a hobby would do me the world of good, I think il be joining a tennis club within the next month to get me focused on either Tennis or School, its what I need to pass the time for me and to let something happen naturally like you said, thanks for the feedback man.

Quote:

---

but when it comes to asking a girl out I keep getting rejected. I approach them by being myself and being.polite and respectful and try to show them love and care,

---

You may be coming on too strong if you are trying to show them love and care when you ask them out.

If you see females as somehow weaker and in need of protection it will show in how you talk to them and act around them. Yes, females would like a 'good' guy, but they also want one who treats them as equals and has confidence in himself. Do you have any interests that help you feel more confident and better about yourself?

Do you have any female friends? Instead of looking for dates at this point in time I think you need to learn how to interact with females in activities where you can see they are more than princesses from fairytales in need of a knight or prince to protect them.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Waltond1997

Again thats a great read for me and I think a hobby would do me the world of good, i think il be joining a tennis club within the next month to get me focused on either Tennis or School, its what I need to pass the time for me and to let something happen naturally like you said, thanks for the feedback man.

---

No problemo.

Tennis is right up my alley. I used to teach people how to play. When you add new things to your life, like tennis, you meet more people. You next relationship doesn't have to come from school. It can come from anywhere. That's why it is important to just let it happen.

I remember being 16. All of my friends who were girls were worried about their thick thighs or small breasts or big feet or bad breath or curly hair -- and that guys wouldn't like them because of that. Sixteen is a horrible age when you are stuck between being a kid and an adult and wondering how you are going to make your way in the world with relationships and school and a career.

College opened up the world for me. I went to a small college but found clubs that interested me and made new friends and became a lot more self confident. Also, I dated (at least once) almost any guy who asked me out -- the fat guys, the skinny ones, the athletic ones, the brainy ones. I learned how I wanted to be treated and what types to say no to in the future. I suspect the same will be true for you with girls.

Meanwhile, like others have said, do well in school and be friends with lots of people, both male and female. When you are with someone, make that person feel like he or she is the most interesting person you could ever be with by being a great listener. There are too many talkers in this world and not enough listeners!