Ask Me Help Desk - Relationship problem

Relationship problem

Hello everyone,

Well me and my boyfriend have been dating for 5 years already. Recently we have been arguing for many things, and most importantly he says that I always get what I want and that I don't try to understand him, nor do I appreciate what he does for me. He may not have all the money in the world and I understand that. I met him in a rough time when he didn't have much so how would I not appreciate all he is doing for me. I understand that sometimes I do want many things and get it but other times he buys them because he knows I will like it.

But the problem is later on he puts it out in my face that I always get what I want. So were going to the mountains and I had told him I was going to look for 3 that I most liked. The prices are not that high and they would be in the range of 200-260' per night but were going with another pair. So I told him which one I had chosen and he started saying I don't appreciate him for what he is giving me and that I don't think of him, and everything that is needed to be paid other than the mountains, and why I did not look for a cheaper one, that supposedly I always have to go for the higher. The lowest one I could was around 195/night and the one I got was 250 or so. He also said that since I don't understand him that he will never take me anywhere else but maybe he said that because he was angry.

I don't know what to do or how I am supposed to appreciate him? I also told him when me and the other pair started talking about the mountains and if he was going to be able to and what days and how long he never mentioned anything about not being able or any price. I don't know what to do or what advice do I need to fix this problem and make him know I care?

Have you already made the reservations? If not tell him you will call the cheaper place and make reservations. Then try to not talk much about what you like or want, talk more about the needs of the house, his needs, things that have to be fixed and things he wants and is interested in. Try to keep the topic off you for a while and see if the relationship improves.

Quote:

Originally Posted by N0help4u

Have you already made the reservations? If not tell him you will call the cheaper place and make reservations. Then try to not talk much about what you like or want, talk more about the needs of the house, his needs, things that have to be fixed and things he wants and is interested in. Try to keep the topic off of you for a while and see if the relationship improves.

Well I offered to switch it, but he said no since I had already told the other pair, but I told him that I would tell the other pair and see if they would want to switch but he said no, that I should have thought of that first, I will try you advice and hopefully our relationship can improve.

Was he involved in the first plans, was he talked to about trip before other couple ?

If money is a real issue, is he concerned over total price ? Can you really afford a trip like this ?

What type of guy is he, emotional, caring, and I know this is weird but it's the only way I can help is he the type of guy who is revolved around sex?

Quote:

Originally Posted by lightning14j

What type of guy is he, emotional, caring, and i know this is wierd but its the only way i can help is he the type of guy who is revolved around sex?

Well we do have a sex around 2 times a week, sometimes just one time because we don't see each other often, but that has never been a problem

My guess is he 'revolves' around making issues in order to be in charge.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck

Was he involved in the first plans, was he talked to about trip before other couple ?

if money is a real issue, is he concerned over total price ? can you really afford a trip like this ?

Well we talked about it before and he agreed to it and never mentioned anything about not being able to pay... thats not really much of his problem he just says that I don't appreciate him or what he does for me and that I only want stuff for me and never think about him when coming to get something, he says I only think in myself

Quote:

Originally Posted by N0help4u

My guess is he 'revolves' around making issues in order to be in charge.

Well sometimes I do believe he just wants to start a fight cause one minute were okay and the next thing he starts saying, "dont think of only what you want think of what I want" we start arguing and its always cause he says I don't appreciate him, and I don't know what I'm suppose to do to make him know I care for him and I'm not interested in money or other items other than him

Have you considered getting a job?

Quote:

Originally Posted by none12345

Have you considered getting a job?

Well I have been looking for a job but no good luck I will be starting nursing program in August and will wait till then to see the schedule to get a job since I am also going to move in with him in his place in another different county