Ask Me Help Desk - I think my man enjoys oral more than intercourse

When me and my partner are getting aroused ,I love to give him oral and get him rock hard and he loves me toake myself orgasm and squirt all over him ,which I love also but then when I try to start intercourse he mostly prefers but not all the time for me to keep giving him oral till he ejaculates , is this because he's just really enjoying it ,or could it mean he doesn't want the intercourse for some reason ,I'd like a mans point of view on it please ,thanks

Many men prefer oral over intercourse, nothing strange about that, Just need to work out where you are getting all the pleasure and sex the way you want it also.

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Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck

Many men prefer oral over intercourse, nothing strange about that, Just need to work out where you are getting all the pleasure and sex the way you want it also.

I do pleasure him and give him it the way he wants it more than I get it the way I like it ,he used to love to pleasure me more but now says he's too fat he can't keep up with me like he did a year ago ,he's not fat he's just put on a couple of stone ,has he just gone lazy cause he masturbates every morning so it's like he's had his and I have to wait a few days to get mine

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Originally Posted by Jodiedoll

I do pleasure him and give him it the way he wants it more than I get it the way I like it ,he used to love to pleasure me more but now says he's too fat he can't keep up with me like he did a year ago ,he's not fat he's just put on a couple of stone ,has he just gone lazy cause he masturbates every morning so it's like he's had his and I have to wait a few days to get mine

Consider the downtime for an average male is around 15min to 30min, I have trouble believing that.

There are several reasons and I honestly think he's told you the main one. Surprisingly enough, men get self-conscious of their weight as much and as often as women. I am about 5stone more then I want to be, but I have made peace with that. There is probably another reason hanging out there to. I think a good communication session is really in order. Talking is the best precursor to great sex and more importantly a long lasting relationship. You need to talk about this but in a non-confrontational way. It isn't that you're wrong or he's wrong. It is just an open dialogue. No accusations. That is important.

As Chuck said, each person enjoys sex a little differently. I couldn't go into my exwife without going down on her, and she wouldn't do the same for me. I have had girlfriends that wouldn't let me go down, which is something I honestly enjoy. I know, too much info. The salient point is everyone is different.

There is a sex columnist call Dan Savage out of the east US. He has the concept of the there Gs. To quote WikiPedia on the subject:

Quote:

It stands for Good, Giving, and Game, and it means one should strive to be good in bed, giving "equal time and equal pleasure" to one's partner, and game "for anything—within reason.

This concept goes both ways. He gets his willy sucked on, and you get your intercourse. It is an interesting thing to ponder.

Good Luck

Last month he didn't want sex at all - https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...re-745236.html

Did you follow the advice you were given last month?

I remember your screen name, because your "ex" is a violent, raging alcoholic and you are in hiding from him - and you let him take your children for the weekends. https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/family...dy-745401.html That didn't make sense to me then. It doesn't make sense to me.

I'm assuming - again - that having a violent, raging alcoholic trying to find the family would have an adverse effect on your sex life.

Quote:

Originally Posted by JudyKayTee

Last month he didn't want sex at all - https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...re-745236.html

Did you follow the advice you were given last month?

I remember your screen name, because your "ex" is a violent, raging alcoholic and you are in hiding from him - and you let him take your children for the weekends. https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/family...dy-745401.html That didn't make sense to me then. It dosn't make sense to me.

I'm assuming - again - that having a violent, raging alcoholic trying to find the family would have an adverse effect on your sex life.

Judykay I was asking a mans point of view ,so please don't waste your own time by answering a question that was meant for a man

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Originally Posted by CravenMorhead

Consider the downtime for an average male is around 15min to 30min, I have trouble believing that.

There are several reasons and I honestly think he's told you the main one. Surprisingly enough, men get self-conscious of their weight as much and as often as women. I am about 5stone more then I want to be, but I have made peace with that. There is probably another reason hanging out there to. I think a good communication session is really in order. Talking is the best precursor to great sex and more importantly a long lasting relationship. You need to talk about this but in a non-confrontational way. It isn't that you're wrong or he's wrong. It is just an open dialogue. No accusations. That is important.

As Chuck said, each person enjoys sex a little differently. I couldn't go into my exwife without going down on her, and she wouldn't do the same for me. I have had girlfriends that wouldn't let me go down, which is something I honestly enjoy. I know, too much info. The salient point is everyone is different.

There is a sex columnist call Dan Savage out of the east US. He has the concept of the there Gs. To quote WikiPedia on the subject:

This concept goes both ways. He gets his willy sucked on, and you get your intercourse. It is an interesting thing to ponder.

Good Luck

Thanks

"Judykay I was asking a mans point of view ,so please don't waste your own time by answering a question that was meant for a man"

And please do not attempt to dictate who will answer your posts. You are free to post, and I am free to answer.

If my answers are factually incorrect, please bring them to the attention of a Mod.

Personally, if "my man" didn't want to have sex with me only wanted my mouth on him instead of intercouse I'd wonder if other women had experienced the same thing. Of course, you don't so, again, that's just how I would hand things.

And even under those circumstances with many, many answers under my belt, I couldn't dictate who would answer me.

Quote:

Judykay I was asking a mans point of view ,so please don't waste your own time by answering a question that was meant for a man

This is a public site, open to anyone that wishes to join. Any member of this site can answer your question. You do not get to dictate who answers. Once you post the question, it's open to the public. It doesn't belong to you, and therefore you cannot dictate who posts.

Having said that, I agree with Craven. I do want to add one little part. The only sexual acts your man is interested in is masturbating, and oral. He has his tight hand, and your tight mouth. Actual intercourse can't compete with his hand and your mouth.

I would sit down and talk to him, tell him that oral isn't enough for you, that you want actual intercourse, and that you're feeling upset that he gets what he wants, but won't give you what you want.

Sex is like any other thing in a relationship, you express yourself to each other and reach an agreement that benefits you both. If you cannot talk and listen to each other, then what's the point?

Your guy seems content to lay there and be serviced and that's not a bad thing at all. The real question, is it enough for you? If it is, no problem, if NOT, say so, nicely of course.

If you are afraid to talk to your guy about sex, now that's a huge problem.

To each their own. I say. Personally, I have never cared for intercourse but it is because of physical limitations with my back(early teen back injury). Just as some people don't care for oral sex, many don' care for intercourse. Talk about it.

Intercourse is good... but lets be honest here... as a guy speaking... a talented person can take that to incredible levels with their mouth... or be so bad at it that he would never let her mouth near it again.

Sort of like Vanilla Ice Cream.. its .good on its ow... but add hot fudge, marshmallow crème, wipped cream and a cherry... and you got something incredible.

Very simple, if he is masturbating every day, should not effect him a hour latter, heck at almost 60, masturbation only helps me last longer, latter that day. And two times or more in the evening is not out of the question. ** and I am fat. Fat just means you may not be able to do every position.

If he is just lazy, that is easy, he has to satisfy you, first before he gets his.

Next Judy's question is valid, which man is this, if he is a drunk that will answer most of the issues there, since that will effect his ability and desire