My sister-in-law"s husband is always coming on to me and my husband is very much aware of this guy saying things to me and he has talk to him and he says its all in play but over this past winter he was texing me on my phone and I would forward it to my husband well at the time we had a family loved one dying of cancer so he had not said anything to his sister about her husband (it was bad timing) well after the funeral he had talked to her about it and she was mad and till this day she will not have anything to do with us or her nephew or nieces in fact the whole family will not have anything to do with us. But he has cheated on her many times before and she is still with him how do I get this family to open there eyes on this guy and he is not worth doing this to us

The only thing you can do is talk to your sister in law and let her know. If she doesn't want to know, she'll refuse to listen. Nobody can make her stand up for herself if she's not willing to do so, and nobody else can do anything about it.

Don't resent her for it... you wouldn't want to believe any of it in her place either, and he's probably misrepresenting it to her anyway.

Stay out of it but suggest your husband talk to his sister. If nothing happens leave it alone for now. He will get his, but for now anything you do will make it worse. Sorry.

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Originally Posted by Nosnosna

The only thing you can do is talk to your sister in law and let her know. If she doesn't want to know, she'll refuse to listen. Nobody can make her stand up for herself if she's not willing to do so, and nobody else can do anything about it.

Don't resent her for it... you wouldn't want to believe any of it in her place either, and he's probably misrepresenting it to her anyway.

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Well she is not willing to listen or believe it with her own eyes she did see the tex messages my husband let her see them and his mother also none of us have spoken in over a year over this,if it was me in this situation I would be very upset but I'm not that dumb to still be with him after everything that has showed to me. She is just missed very much and its sad

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Originally Posted by catty

well after the funeral he had talked to her about it and she was mad and till this day she will not have anything to do with us or her nephew or nieces in fact the whole family will not have anything to do with us. but he has cheated on her many times before and she is still with him how do i get this family to open there eyes on this guy and he is not worth doing this to us

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If someone that desperate for companionship refuses to talk with you or your children then I think you should consider it a blessing, family member or not. She has nothing positive to bring to your children's lives unless you want them taking in life lessons that it's okay to be used and then 25 years from now they are wondering why they are living the same experience she is. It's best not to have her around.

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Originally Posted by chuff

If someone that desperate for companionship refuses to talk with you or your children then I think you should consider it a blessing, family member or not. She has nothing positive to bring to your children's lives unless you want them taking in life lessons that it's okay to be used and then 25 years from now they are wondering why they are living the same experience she is. It's best not to have her around.

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She is very desperate and a sad person who never smiles or has any fun. When ever there was a get together she would always be looking around the corner to see what he was doing and who he was talking to. I do not want my children around that stuff my oldest is18 and my youngest is 9

It's sad that the family has cast your part of it out, but they are following her lead. If she had kicked him out of her life, they'd all be sitting around talking about what a scumbag he was. One day she will realize that not only was he grotesquely unfaithful, but she sacrificed relationships with her own family that will never be the same because of him. For now, move on and ignore the cold shoulder. You have a full life, and unlike her, you have the option of making it a happy one.

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Originally Posted by vlee

It's sad that the family has cast your part of it out, but they are following her lead. If she had kicked him out of her life, they'd all be sitting around talking about what a scumbag he was. One day she will realize that not only was he grotesquely unfaithful, but she sacrificed relationships with her own family that will never be the same because of him. For now, move on and ignore the cold shoulder. You have a full life, and unlike her, you have the option of making it a happy one.

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Thank you for saying that!!
You are so right the family will never be the same again will I ever forgive her I don't think so too much time has past and she has thought about this, and yet no phone call nothing

You don't have to forgive her. You just can't let it eat at you. The revelations I mentioned before may not happen to her for years to come, and even then she may be too proud to ever admit she was wrong. But that's no skin off your back. You did what was right, and she reacted poorly.

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Originally Posted by vlee

You don't have to forgive her. You just can't let it eat at you. The revelations I mentioned before may not happen to her for years to come, and even then she may be too proud to ever admit she was wrong. But that's no skin off your back. You did what was right, and she reacted poorly.

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It dose eat at me because we hear about the family get togethers that we are not invited to but he is there with all of the family and my kids are not there to see there relatives but they would rather him be around then us my kids haven't seen their grandmother in over a year because of this stuff