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-   -   My 8 year old hits and yells at my 5 yrear old (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=74517)

  • Mar 21, 2007, 01:51 PM
    tabylyn
    My 8 year old hits and yells at my 5 yrear old
    I need help I am very upset I don't know how to handle that my children fight constantly I have tried putting them in different rooms keeping the with me in every room I am in but they still fight my 8 year old doesn't know how to control her feelings and when she is mad at my 5 year old she hits him I am scared that she is going to hurt him please help
  • Mar 21, 2007, 03:19 PM
    ATYOURSERVICE
    WELCOME to parenthood! Speaking to your child at eye level state that you are not happy that she would hit her brother. The her that she hurts you when she does it. Time out is always good, or take away her favorite thing. Stick to it and set a time.
    Let her know you are doing it because she hit her brother and that is wrong. She is 8 so she is in school. Speak to your girls teacher. I there a patern there?. might she been getting bullied at school?

    If not the case could just be rivary. Brother and sister's always fight. Seems nomral, it's the hitting another person that is the problem.

    When my boys were smaller (2-5) and one would hit the other, I would hold the hitter and have the one who was hit.. hit them the same way. Most parents or so called "therapist" will tell you that is not healthy but they learned they did not want to be hit either.

    Now my boys are just verbal. They call each other names.

    Good luck to you...
  • Mar 21, 2007, 04:32 PM
    Fr_Chuck
    Well make her stop, tell her, and an occasional swat on the rear seems to make them understand thing a lot faster.
  • Mar 22, 2007, 06:31 AM
    vlee
    Children this age have a hard time expressing anger with words, and often resort to fists because that is an easy and clear way to let someone know they are ticking you off. All you can do is punish the behavior if it happens when you aren't in the room, but if you are there, you can usually see it escalating or can tell that this is a situation that could easily become violent for your child. In that case, approach the child. Speak calmly (he isn't going to learn better behavior if you lose your cool). Ask him to tell you how he feels, why he feels that way, and what ideas he has about how to fix the problem. It sounds stupid, but if used properly it will train him to develop a thinking process to deal with anger. Obviously a situation is resolved with thought, not force. Just my opinion. Good Luck!
  • Jan 5, 2012, 08:29 PM
    helpwithlove123
    Its just a sibling thing, they will eventually grow out of it. My brother and sister used to do that at that age too.

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