Girlfriend is Confused - Should I end it?
My girlfriend broke up with me a few weeks ago, on March 8 via email. I was out of the country and got an email that basically said 'I need to break up with you because I'm not feeling what I need to in this relationship". We have been together since hte beginning of September, an official couple since November. She had asked me to go exclusive. We had never had so much as a minor fight before this. She had kept telling me how much she liked me, so I told her a week before Valentine's Day that I loved her and she said it back to me really happily & excitedly (no hesitation). The week before I got this email, she had called me and at hte end told me "I love you, I miss you & I'll see you when you come back". So understandably, this came out of the blue. I honestly thought she liked me more than I liked her.
We've met twice since she sent that email and at the end of every time we kiss and she says that she'll think about continuing it.
I talked to her on the phone from out of town the next day for like 45 minutes. By the end of it she felt a bit better and we were going to meet. We met for like 4 hours when I came back. Her main reasons were that we didn't spend enough time together - even though we had never talked about this before. She also said she felt like our love didn't transcend & fix her problems like she had wanted them to. She also said she regretted telling me she loved me but that she trusted me and cared about me. She said she felt like we were in two separate worlds, not our own world together and that it has to do with the way we relate. It took a lot of convincing but by the end of it she said 'ok, I'll think about this [not ending it] and we can meet again later this week.' We kissed a little bit and she left.
We met again later that week for a few hours. She said that she hadn't really changed her mind. Like she really cares about me and said that this would be really easy if she could just tell me she hates me and never wants to see me again, but she can't. She siad that technically it may be good for her right now to be in a relationship but that she's not really sure what is happening with her life in August when her lease is up and she's trying to get a new job (she's been pretty unhappy at her current one). She also kept saying that she wanted to spend more time with me - normal time, not just having fun on weekends but just being there with each other even if we were working on our own projects. I said that if she wants to spend more time with me, I'd be glad to. But she kept saying that she didn't think I could do it - even though we've never tried before. We talked normally for a while and touched and all that and at the end again we kissed a few times and she said that she'd think about staying together. She was going for a bike ride that she had planned a while ago and said she'd call me after to meet up later that night. She never called and just texted that she was tired and going to bed. I haven't heard from her since.
What is going on? Does she want to end it and just can't get herself to do it? Does she really want to spend more time together? Should I just end it officially on my own and get my stuff back from her?