So there's this girl that I startes dating when I was 15 and she was 14. She was the one begging for me to go out with her.. during our whole freshman year in high school she waited for an answer from me until I finally decides to date her.. because I liked her a lot. Our first year didn't went so good. She was my first girlfriend so I didn't had any idea about what she felt and I how I was supposed to treat her.. we were about to break up but at the end I decides that I loved her and decided to stay with her. Then everything was perfect between her and I. we had little fight but never too serious to consider breaking up.. I really loved her and she knew that.. I knew she loved me to our relationship was never vulnerable to anything. She said she was living her own fairytale with me and everyrhing.. then in our senior year of high school. Towards the end she was pregnant with our kid.. after much talk and hard decision we both agreed to have an abortion.. I felt like I destroyed half of her but also she was so excited about going to college and continue studying.. so we took that decision and the whole summer went pretty well.. she was sad for leavinh me but I promised that I would wait for her and she kept crying and feeling sad.. she said she never wanted to lose me and we already had plans. I was going to start working right away and save enough money so when she graduated from college we would already have a house were we could live.. we decided that we were going to get married and have a family. We both dreamed about it... everything turned wrong because my job required me to work during week and weekends.. I wasn not able to see her and she told me many times how she hates my job.. but I told her I couldn't quit because I was making 15$ an hour. Yes it was selfish of me but I asked her to understand and to be strong for both of us.. 2 months ago all of a sudden she broke up with me.. she told me that school and not being able to seem me affected her. I told her that I would quit my job if she asked me to. But she never had intentions of getting back together. This weekend I missed work just to see her and she treated me like if I was I criminal.. she hated me. She never explained anything to me. Why she did it. What happened. She never told me if she still loved me or if we will get back together. The only thing she told me was that she had kissed another guy. The worst is that she broke up with me over the phone.. a text message.. she never gave me a chance to talk to her. She ignored me completely.. and the last thing she told me was that she hated me and she disnt felt what she felt before. I cannot understand what happened. I really don't want to forget about her. To me she was the perfect girl.. how can I get her back?

Well, you two chose a hard road. First, it's very hard to go through a teen pregnancy. At any age, it's extremely hard for a relationship to make it through an abortion. I hope in future relationships, you will avoid sex until you are married, or at the very least seriously engaged with immediate plans to marry. Having both of these experiences, the end of your relationship was pretty much a foregone conclusion - I know, as I worked in adoption with many pregnant young ladies and their boyfriends. The relationships almost never lasted, no matter what the girls chose to do - abortion, adoption or parenting - the relationship almost always failed.

Another huge challenge is when one or both of you begin college. College is as much social as it is academic, and a big part of the experience is coming into ones own, figuring out who you are separate from your family, and outside of the reputation or image you built in high school. It is such an all-encompassing experience to attend college, boyfriends or girlfriends from high school usually get left behind because they simply aren't a part of this new life. More often than not, college students want to date other students that they meet, who are around all the time, and understand the life of a student because they are sharing in the experience at the same time. It's hard even if you're both students but going to different schools. So much of dating in college is being together, whether studying, hanging out at parties or bars, or just taking a break between classes. You can't share this part of her life, and she needs someone who can. She probably is also realizing that once she is college educated, a college educated man will be a better match for her.

I do not recommend that you try to get back with her. You learned a lot from this experience and you have still more to learn, from having your heart broken and moving on from a serious relationship. We all go through this at one time or another, and this is unfortunately your turn to have your heart broken.

Your goals to work, save and buy a house are still great goals. Also work on determining where you want to be in your own profession in 4 years - do you want to go to school after you've saved some work, or do you already have a good trade? $15 an hour is a good income, but not enough on which to raise a family, so maybe this is a good time for you to consider how to upgrade your own qualifications whether learning a skilled trade or going to university.

Take a break from girls and, if you're having a hard time forgetting about this young lady, find distractions. Make sure you have social plans. See your parents and siblings, hang out with the guys. Work out, take extra shifts at work, read, rent movies. Spend time refining your financial and career goals, research your options, make an investment plan. Make a list of all the things you want to do to put yourself in a great, solid position and look for life balance - health and fitness, financial stability, intellectual growth and development, growth in your social life, strong family relationships. Think about what you're interested in doing, then do it.

When you seek this kind of balance, you will come through this breakup in a stronger position than you were in before, and you will be more attractive to, and better equipped to be successful with the right woman when she comes along.

You have to accept the other person's word when they tell you they do not want to be with you any longer. It feels like the end of the world, but when you find the right girl you will find that the first girl did you a favor by moving on.