13

Can I go back to a purer time
When everything was simple
Before my mind was so corrupt,
Can I go back to a purer time
When everything was simple
Before my mind was so corrupt,
Before all of my thoughts were consumed,
Before I looked in the mirror and cried
Or screamed
Or hated the refection I saw
I want to go back to the times when split,
Bleeding wrists were not a route to dissolve pain.
I want to bring back the past
A past where I wasn't ridiculed for my clothing and
Hollister didn't dictate lives
A past where jokes were humorous and not a weapon.
Before my thoughts withered
Before I lost my mind.
I can't take it
I've lost control and there's no escape.
No escape
I never thought that I,
As 13 years old,
Would get to this extreme state of internal trama.
It will not stop. It seemingly will not seise.
13 and insane, may I go back to the past?

Please don't be too harsh

Is this supposed to repeat in the beginning? I'm not sure that's necessary. Check your spelling on the word "seize." Otherwise, it's very good.

Is is seize or cease that you're going for in the line:

"It will not stop. It seemingly will not seise."

Also;

Trauma, not trama
Reflection, not refection,

Over all it's good writing, just a few spelling mistakes. :)

Quote:

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Originally Posted by teacherjenn4

Is this supposed to repeat in the beginning? I'm not sure that's necessary. Check your spelling on the word "seize." Otherwise, it's very good.

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It wasn't supposed to repeat the beginnin, I copied and pasted it and I guess the second time when I pasted it I didn't delete all of the first paste

Quote:

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Originally Posted by axdwdrgc

It wasn't supposed to repeat the beginnin, I copied and pasted it and I guess the second time when I pasted it I didn't delete all of the first paste

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Then, it's even better!