Me and this guy have been dating for two years. The first few months went OK, the only problem I had and still do was that he didn't have a job. He is 5 years younger, lives with his parents and they shelter and feed him. He is a very helpful person, not financially thought.

He doesn't have many friends and if we have to go on trips, or out for a drink, I'm always the one who pays. When he does get money of his own he always thinks about his needs rather than me. We always quarrel over this, I tell him he is lazy and selfish, and all he would say if I think so I should leave. He has been talking to female friends on the phone lately but always hides when he is talking. I confronted him about it, and he told me they are just friends and he needed friends.

We are slowly drifting away. I sit and tell him I love him and want us to be together, I even cry. He said he don't know if he wants to be with me, and he think I should leave him alone. I really love him.

Should I stay? Please help me.

Don't get blind in love. It will do no good to either of you. May be the guy will learn later but don't waste and invest your time in such person. Leave him.

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Originally Posted by smkanand

don't get blind in love. it will do no good to either of you. may be the guy will learn later but don't waste and invest your time in such person. leave him.

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Sometimes I think about leaving.but I do not want to be the one to hurt him by leaving ,how should I leave , and how to get over him when I do ?

There is nothing wrong with leaving a guy who won't work for a living and lets you pay his way. It isn't just the money; it's the dependence on his parents, and the unwillingness to be an adult. Not only that, but it sounds like he drifts towards other women every time there is any conflict between you. He is going to be an eternal child, looking for the easy solution to everything. I don't see how it could be difficult to break up with him. He sounds like he doesn't even mind that much, and you have to learn that you can't feel sorry for people all the time. You can be nice about breaking up and not say terrible things, just that it's time to move on.

You get over him the way we all do - keep busy, and go back to your old friends who you shouldn't have abandoned when he came along. And you should never be jealous of someone who wants to keep his friends.

So you want to wait for him to leave you you be hurt ?

He sounds like he does not really care for you, from his actions. This is before anything long term, it will only get worst

Dump this selfish dead weight. That's how you handle this situation. He won't care at all, because between you and his family he doesn't need a job.

You have done your best and given your heart to the wrong person who doesn't know what to do with, and doesn't appreciate it. Dump him and cry for now, and know you deserve better.

Think about yourself for a change and not him, he doesn't deserve a good girlfriend lie YOU!

Think about two of you being engaged or married and the guy still the same. Do you see your future bright? Do you see respectable life? More importantly love is just one part of a relationship. You can love many but you can not respect all. If you think this guy deserves your respect and he will respect you ( which he doesn't) then wait. But certainly, such person has no self respect who is not independent and willing to. So, talk to him casually and break up.

Well he ask for space and time to think things ova , he said maybe things might work out but he doesn't love me any more.he say he thinks I should leave n find someone else .he even told his female friend that he dump me a weeks ago,and he told her that he don't even call me any more.she ask him in front of me if he love me and he said he doesn't know . After all this including his family wanting him to leave me for the girl I have decided to give him all the space he asked for and move on with my life.

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Originally Posted by hurt2013

Well he ask for space and time to think things ova , he said maybe things might work out but he doesn't love me any more.he say he thinks I should leave n find someone else .he even told his female friend that he dump me a weeks ago,and he told her that he don't even call me any more.she ask him infront of me if he love me and he said he doesn't know . After all this including his family wanting him to leave me for the girl I have decided to give him all the space he asked for and move on with my life.

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I forget to mention that since I've made up my mind to let him have his space .he has been sticking around me a lot now almost 24/7 .he is trying to find a job now and he offers to pay for stuff including health sometimes .I don't know why he is doing this because he seems to be dating his friend now after she realise that I was leaving him she told him she would stop tlkn to him because she don't want to b the blame but he still calls her to make he feel secure and to let her know that he really doesn't love me. Y is he trying to be good to me now n still disreSpect me ?

He is using you.

Your only path is No Contact. If you have to deal with him in real life, keep it as brief and cool as possible. Do not text or email or call him, or answer any from him.

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Originally Posted by Wondergirl

He is using you.

Your only path is No Contact. If you have to deal with him in real life, keep it as brief and cool as possible. Do not text or email or call him, or answer any from him.

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Thanks

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Originally Posted by hurt2013

Thanks

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And my advice went in one ear and out the other?

Do you know why he is hanging around you again?
I'll bet anything the other girl threw him out on his ear after the first date he couldn't even pay his own way for.
That's why he says he's looking for work.
Tell him to TRY to contact you 6 months after a solid full time job is going well.

No More Contact Whatsoever. Put an end to his conniving drama.