Ask Me Help Desk - Erection problem

I had fine erections up to the age of 16-17- I became so embarrassed by my erections that I started to wear very tight underwears and tucked my penis brutally in them so no one can see it even when I'm fully erect because I used to be very shy in my teens. I also started to masterbate at 16.

I realised at the age of 22 that my penis was bending downwards so I stopped wearing those underwears . I also realised that the erections were not that hard as it was. At 22 I had a girlfriend and when I took her to bed I could not get an erection. I did not try to find a girlfriend for about 6 years because I was embarrassed and depended on porn and masturbation.

At 30 I tried to give it a go again with an escort but after a lot of kissing and her trying to get me off I still could not get an erection and now I'm really stuck and worried . I do get morning erections most of the times I wake up and they are the hardest I get. Other than that I only get erections when I masterbate but I don't think they are hard enough to penetrate . I can't get erections when I'm with a girl. Although I think I have a high sexual drive because I masterbate everyday.

Now I'm 31 and want to get married and have kids but I don't want to ruin someone's life. How can I have normal and hard erections with a girl just like everyone else

My family wants me to get married and I can't do it because of erection problem but in our culture it is very insulting so I can't tell them why. Even my GP knows the family so I can't tell him. My problem details are below please advise if it's curable or not:
I had fine erections up to the age of 16-17- I became so embarrassed by my erections that I started to wear very tight underwears and tucked my penis brutally in them so no one can see it even when I'm fully erect because I used to be very shy in my teens. I also started to masterbate at 16.

I realised at the age of 22 that my penis was bending downwards so I stopped wearing those underwears . I also realised that the erections were not that hard as it was. At 22 I had a girlfriend and when I took her to bed I could not get an erection. I did not try to find a girlfriend for about 6 years because I was embarrassed and depended on porn and masturbation.

At 30 I tried to give it a go again with an escort but after a lot of kissing and her trying to get me off I still could not get an erection and now I'm really stuck and worried . I do get morning erections most of the times I wake up and they are the hardest I get. Other than that I only get erections when I masterbate but I don't think they are hard enough to penetrate . I can't get erections when I'm with a girl. Although I think I have a high sexual drive because I masterbate everyday.

Now I'm 31 and want to get married and have kids but I don't want to ruin someone's life. How can I have normal and hard erections with a girl just like everyone else

Have you gone to the doctor about this yet? That's more important than anything. This could be a medical issue. I'm not an expert, but off the top of my head this can be a symptom of diabetes, high blood pressure, your prostate, or your testosterone is low. Not everyone with low testosterone has erection problems, but if your testosterone is low enough it can happen. The doctor can give you testosterone shots/ gel/ or patches to increase your testosterone, which can completely fix the problem! Please go to the doctor as soon as possible if you haven't already!

Quote:

Originally Posted by JeeBoss123

My family wants me to get married and I can't do it cos of erection problem but in our culture it is very insulting so I can't tell them why. Even my GP knows the family so I can't tell him.

Doctors should never talk about their patients medical problems to anyone (even if they know your family). They can get in trouble for that. But if you're really worried he'd tell your family then go to a different doctor.

You must first give yourself permission to relax. Its OK to masterbate, but when you are in front of a mate and fail to have an erection, this may be a sign you are having a performance anxiety. Failure is only something that we achieve when we give up. You should understand that its perfectly natural to be nervous, but don't let that nervous feeling inhibit you from feeling the emotions you truly wish to have with another mate. Give yourself permission to relax and enjoy your lifes experience. Going to a Doctor having your testosterone checked is not a bad idea. Getting a complete physical would be ideal to rule out any physical challenges. Then that may lead you on the path to just giving yourself permission to relax and enjoy your mate, and experience all the things that love will bring. Happiness, love, and intimacy should not be something you want to inhibit. These kinds of experiences can help mold youy into the person you are always working to become. Good luck to you, and remember. Giving yourself permission is all about you letting go and moving forward in your lifes experiences.