Ask Me Help Desk - Dad splits for 6-9

My sons father will not call or see my son for as long as 8 months and then tries to call again I want to file abandonment on him because it isn't fair for him to keep doing this to my son but I'm not sure how it works here in Ohio I was receiving child support up until early November and I haven't received any now in 2 months. Help?

If you could file for "abandonment," what would be your purpose?

If you aren't getting court ordered support take him back to Court for contempt.

Here is an explanation of Ohio law: "In Ohio, a child is considered abandoned if the parents have failed to visit or contact the child for 90 days, even if they make an attempt to contact the child after that time. A child is defined as any individual under the age of 18. In Ohio, an abandoned child is categorized as a neglected child. Filing a Report - If a person believes a child has been abandoned (or is being abused in any other way), he must file a report with the child protective services (CPS) office. CPS will investigate the situation beginning within 24 hours and the state will respond accordingly."

What does the title mean - father splits for 6-9?

Quote:

Originally Posted by JudyKayTee

If you could file for "abandonment," what would be your purpose?

If you aren't getting court ordered support take him back to Court for contempt.

Here is an explanation of Ohio law: "In Ohio, a child is considered abandoned if the parents have failed to visit or contact the child for 90 days, even if they make an attempt to contact the child after that time. A child is defined as any individual under the age of 18. In Ohio, an abandoned child is categorized as a neglected child. Filing a Report - If a person believes a child has been abandoned (or is being abused in any other way), he must file a report with the child protective services (CPS) office. CPS will investigate the situation beginning within 24 hours and the state will respond accordingly."

What does the title mean - father splits for 6-9?

Ya I get what your saying. I really would just like him to sign over his rights so he can't be a bad influence on my son. All he does is hurt and disappoint him and I think it would be better if he just wasn't in his life at all

He can only sign over his rights if someone else is qualified and willing to adopt the child.

Take him to Court over the support.

Unfortunately you can't make him be a good father but you can make him pay to be a father!

Quote:

Originally Posted by JudyKayTee

He can only sign over his rights if someone else is qualified and willing to adopt the child.

Take him to Court over the support.

Unfortunately you can't make him be a good father but you can make him pay to be a father!

Thank you for the help and I will definitely get the support in order!

Good for you - it's not easy being a single parent and it's even more difficult when the other parent is a jerk.

Let us know how things go -

Other than coming in and out of your child's life, are there other ways he's a bad influence on your son? For example, does he drink or do drugs, act abusively, etc?

If these are the issues, you might want to consider amending his visitation so that it has to be supervised or, if he is a chronic no show, making it less frequent so that you can at least reduce the disappointments in your child's life. And if you have the child more, you might be able to ask for higher child support.

If he's not paying reliably, also make sure that he is paying through the state instead of paying you directly. Through this arrangement, his wages are garnished and you will more reliably get paid. This is not very effective if he is self-employed, paid cash or works for tips but if he gets a regular paycheck, it's wonderfully helpful.

I agree with everything Judy said, as well.

Good luck.

Quote:

Originally Posted by dontknownuthin

Other than coming in and out of your child's life, are there other ways he's a bad influence on your son? For example, does he drink or do drugs, act abusively, etc?

If these are the issues, you might want to consider amending his visitation so that it has to be supervised or, if he is a chronic no show, making it less frequent so that you can at least reduce the disappointments in your child's life. And if you have the child more, you might be able to ask for higher child support.

If he's not paying reliably, also make sure that he is paying through the state instead of paying you directly. Through this arrangement, his wages are garnished and you will more reliably get paid. This is not very effective if he is self-employed, paid cash or works for tips but if he gets a regular paycheck, it's wonderfully helpful.

I agree with everything Judy said, as well.

Good luck.

Yes he does have a drinking problem and a history of domestic violence against his mother (all documented). We do have an order of support through the state but he got fired from his job as a waiter and is working 2 days a week at another restaurant and our child support in Ohio takes awhile to find his new job if he doesn't let them know where he's working. I'm sure everyone wonders why I would get involved with such a loser but I was 17 and dumb I'm just trying to give my son the best life I can

Half the population gets involved with the wrong people - thus the divorce rate.

You can probably get supervised visitation. Among other benefits, the supervision would provide documentation of his no-show behavior and pave the way down the line if you want to terminate his parenting time.

I do not see any benefit in terminating his parental rights and responsibilities entirely though - visitaiton and child support are separate issues, and I see no purpose to terminating his responsibility to pay support. He may one day straighten up and get a better job, and your child will benefit from whatever support he pays.

If you one day marry and your spouse wants to adopt your child though, keeping good records now can make it easier to get a court to terminate his rights to pave the way for your spouse's adoption of the child.