Just so you know its FRIDAY.
A Good Pun is Its Own Reword
- A man's home is his castle, in a manor of speaking.
- Dijon vu - the same mustard as before.
- Shotgun wedding: A case of wife or death.
- A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
- Sea captains don't like crew cuts.
- Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?
- Reading while sunbathing makes you well-red.
- When two egotists meet, it's an I for an I.
- A bicycle can't stand on its own because it is two-tired.
- What's the definition of a will? (Come on, It's a dead giveaway!)
- A backward poet writes inverse.
Top Reasons For Joining The Church Choir
- You're running out of clean clothes and the robe saves on laundry.
- The church is usually crowded and you want to make sure you always have a seat.
- You've just been selected for jury duty and you want to get use to sitting with a large group of people.
- The collection plate is never passed to the choir.
- There's a clock in the back of the church and you want to know when one hour has passed.
- For years you have wanted to know who sits in the back of the church but were afraid to turn around and look.
- You've been known to nod off during the service and don't want the minister/priest to catch you.
- The chairs for the choir are padded and are the most comfortable chairs in the church.
You Might Be A Redneck If
- Your local ambulance has a trailer hitch.
- You watch cartoons long after your kids get bored.
- You think the French Riviera is a foreign car.
- You think you are an entrepreneur because of the "Dirt for Sale" sign in the front yard.
- You're still scalping tickets after the concert is over.
- You don't think Jeff's Foxworthy's jokes are funny.
- Every time you see a roadsign that says "DIP" you reach in your back pocket.
- You've ever had Thanksgiving dinner on a Ping-Pong table.
