Hi me and my girl friend have been together for 5 years. Im 27 she is 43 when we met we took things slow as I had not long got been out off a marige. We got on so well that 6 moths in to seeing each other we both decided to make ago off it every thing was amazing and we fell in love. Every thing was bp good bp the day we met intell 18 months ago we had to move back to the town I lived in for 20 years. I fell back to the rang crowed for a short time and my girl friend asked me to move out so I did. I want and sorted myself out and we started talking agen we got on well and started seeing eachothe once or twice aweek its ago this way for the last year. She wants me one minit and tells me how much she loves me and then the next thing she go's all cold and bushes me away and i.ve cort her out lying to me. Any help please?

Time to move on... its clear she is lukewarm towards you now and it's a waste of time expecting that to change.

What her behavior indicates is she might still like you but she has decided you aren't "The One".

The age difference, probably made glaringly obvious when you hung out with the 'wrong crowd,' caught up with both of you. Plus it's most likely hitting her anyway, as she gets wrinkles and pre-menopausal, and she doesn't want someone so young anymore, even though she loves you. She's moving on but isn't quite ready to let go of you yet, but she will. It isn't worth waiting for the final break up.

Thank you your advice is going to help me. Im going to trie and be strang and stay away I love this women mor than I love life its self. What do I do if she contacs me asking to meet or to spend the night together? This women is my world we have been throug a lot together. This is going to be hard any tips?

YOU have to stop making her your life... because the feeling is clearly not reciprical.

Avoid booty calls... because you apparently are going to have enough of a rough time mentally moving on... botty calls would only make that even harder for you.

If you can remain friends and do this or have to go full no contact... is up to what you can handle personally.

Thank you. I did read this thing about a 60 day know contacked roul. Do you think this would help? I.ve not text or phoned her but I keep getting text and they can be nasty sometimes! I don't know if she means it or knot. I feel like I'm in the rang and a fayler!

If she is being nasty... then just go no contact... its never easy to do.. but for your own mental health and happiness.. it might be what you have to do.

It is looking that way and its going to be the hardist thing todo. I.ve give up sum really nasty stuff in my life and didn't think I could but did. This is so much harder and draining! Its strang how much your are helping just be doing what you do I can't think you anoth! Happy new year to you.

Don't look at it from the woe is me perspective... (hard to avoid that in these situations) and look at it from the... "I'm glad I won't have to deal with those tirades every other day" perspective...

Take a negative to focus on (these mood swings) and it distracts you from thinking about the situation... that will normally fade with time and that's a coping tactic to make it go a little easier until then.

Turn a - and replace with a + you make it sound easy. Im really pashinot about my job and reading!

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Originally Posted by dannybio

turn a - and replace with a + you make it sound easy. Im really pashinot about my job and reading!

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Nobody said it will make it easy... I said it will make it EASIER... big difference... why make something more difficult than it really has to be... as long as it gets the job done. How easy has a lot to do with your attitude to get through adversity.

It's a good tactic to get you through almost anything you have to do... that you don't want to do. Trust me.. you probably know how often we have to to things we hate in life. Stewing over it at every moment only makes it seem twice as hard. Trust me... soon enough you will be laughing about how you are feeling right this moment. Most if not all of us have been there before... many more than once.