My husbands parents seem to be interfering as our daughter they love but seem to overpower us as parents when we go round once a week. They fuss over jessica like they have never seen her before, they also sing songs and get out the camera , they used to spoil her at one time but I asked them to calm down as it felt they were buying too much of what we couldn't afford. The atmosphere always seems tense and I hate being there but I go as they have the right to see jessica. They also say come for dinner then on Sunday if you like and they have told us there opening a account for her when she has one family can pay into the child's trust fund, is it us we have tried cutting down the days but when I see them I'm coming away annoyed and stressed as over done it with jessica please give me advice! They don't make much conversation with us either all there time is focused on jessica

What is your husband's opinion? Does he feel the same way you do? Because, if anything is done, you both have to be on the same page.

I have a grandaughter and she is my life. She lives with me (she is 2). But I always try not to overshadow her mother (my daughter) because I do not want her to feel bad. Usually grandparents are in a little better financial situation than the parents and unknowingly try to give everything to their grandchildren. Some grandparents do not mean anything by it, they just want to baby the child(children). Don't be too hard on them, they just want to be a part of the child's lifes and this is the only way that they can do it. Remember that your daughter lives with you so she knows you and loves you. Going to her grandparents should be a treat.

Honestly, I do not see anything wrong with what they are doing. It is once a week. That is what grandparents are suppose to do. Fuss and coo, and spoil. They are opening an account for her you should be thankful.

Why are you so jealous. This comes down to jealousy that they are all focused on jessica and not you. Well sorry to burst your bubble but that is exactly what most normal grandparents do to their grand child. Let them do that once a week, and let them focus on jessica. This is important to the grandparents they cooled down to once a week. That is not much to ask of you, is it?

Joe

Whoa nelly, Hun first as a grandparent myself I must say that when we go overboard with grandkids it is only because we love them so dearly.
What is wrong with the pictures, singing, and just enjoying your child?
What is wrong in them wanting to make sure she can go to college or whatever later? You should be happy that they do show this love and caring. What if later your child had to forget her hopes and dreams because there might not be adaquate finances available?
I also spend more time in being there with my grandchildren more than my son and his wife.. THEY ARE MATURE and understand that that time is precious to me.
YOU must realise that grandparents only have so much time and we know this to be with loved ones the years past far to quickly... and speaking for myself now " i want my grandchildren to have lots of happy memories with me when i was alive".
Now how can you say that that is wrong? Are you maybe feeling that it is a competition? It 's not you know.. Us grandparents knowq you are the parents but at the same time DON'T TAKE THAT PRECIOUS TIME THEY HAVE LEFT AWAY FROM THEM

I'd like to say, I know where you are coming from! You don't want to feel annoyed and stressed every time you are in the situation. I would just put up boundry's. I agree with the other post, they just want to love there grandchild. But maybe if it's overwhelming you could kindly ask that they don't spend as much money, or ask your approval on gifts before buying. Then if you want some time with them where they focus isn't on your child. Try making a dinner night once a month that your daughter stays with a sitter. I think it's still completely understandable to want a relationship of your own with out the cooing all the time.

I strongly suspect there is more to this then you have told us. I have a feeling the tensions existed before you had their grandchild.

But frankly, like the others, I don't see anything to complain about here. You asked them to tone things down and they did, so they are not going overboard. You also don't say how old Jessica is, or whether this is their only grandkid, which makes a difference.

But I think you should be happy they want to help.