Me and my ex split up 8 years ago and she started dating someone a little after, any way she is still with him now but we have met up and had sex a few times over the years. About 4 months ago we met up and have having an affair ever since , we have fell in love with each other but she has just decided to she wants 2 stay with him because she has been for 8 years an he deserves 1 last go. She says she loves him but not like she loves me - he has been nice to her an they have a nice life together. She says if she wasn't with someone we would be together - she is totally in love with me but can't walk out on another relationship when the going gets tough. When I've questioned her she said she can't carry on with 2 lives and it would be easier to leave me than him. She says she's so confused!!

Cheating? I will never get people who cheat. If she is willing to cheat with you she would be willing to cheat on you.

Seriously can't you find someone new? I would never be in that type of relationship. Who wants to be second fiddle? She is going back to him and having sex with him. How does that sit with you?

Cheating!

100% agree with Oliver. Tried to one-up that post, but I was denied.

You need to understand that she is your ex for a reason.

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Originally Posted by Daviesp2

she wants 2 stay with him because she has been for 8 years an he deserves 1 last go

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He deserves a new girlfriend. There are no excuses for cheating. And like Oliver already pointed out, if you date her, she is likely to cheat on you once "the going gets tough".

She is so confused? I think she is not confused, but is "playing the field", having sex and it means nothing to her. I really think you would be much happier looking around for someone else. Remember, a good relationship must have trust, respect, and a willingness to talk about anything. You will find someone; but you have to start looking first. I do with you the best, and Merry Christmas.

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Originally Posted by fredg

She is so confused? I think she is not confused, but is "playing the field", having sex and it means nothing to her. I really think you would be much happier looking around for someone else. Remember, a good relationship must have trust, respect, and a willingness to talk about anything. You will find someone; but you have to start looking first. I do with you the best, and Merry Christmas.

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That is a good point. Sex is more than just the physical. A relationship is more than just saying "She's my girlfriend." It is the connection, the love, the trust, etc. If you are going to cheat, get out of the relationship first.

I know it is naïve for me to say I don't get cheating but honestly I don't get it. If I ever cheated on my significant other I couldn't live with myself.

Cheating - UGH!