I have been with my girlfriend for just over 2 years. We started being great together and I found being with her made me happy. She has never been able to trust me during our relationship due to her last relationship, I understood at first, but after 2 years, with me doing nothing wrong, I started to think it was wrong! I am very trustworthy. She also seems to act up in front of my friends and can make me feel like an idiot. She seems to be able to walk all over me and I just let her! I hate arguing and seem to just agree to stop arguments.

A few months ago, I started talking to an old school friend who became quite ill and was in hospital for about a month. As I work in the same hospital, I went to see her each day just so she could see a friendly face. I have now found that I madly like this girl and I can’t get her off my mind.

I am stuck in the dilemma of what to do. I have not been happy lately, mainly due to my girlfriend, who I do still love. But this other girl just makes me feel happy, when I see her, I just feel completely different. It is an amazing feeling. I haven’t told her how I feel though, I don’t know if this would be right whilst I am still in a relationship. Whereas I went to see my girlfriend at the weekend, and I felt so bad, a depressed kind of feeling.

I don’t want to hurt my girlfriend but I don’t see what else I can do. Should I break up with my girlfriend for the possibility of this other girl? My other dilemma is when! It is so close to Christmas, and her birthday is only a few weeks away. Should I do it before Christmas? Should I tell the other girl how I feel before I break up with my girlfriend?

It's not terrible to break up with someone before chirstmas or their birthday. At least not as terrible as it would be staying with them through such time out of pity.

The decision to break up with her is completely up to you but why stay in a relationship if you're unhappy? It's unfair to the both of you.

First there are two or more things going on here and you need to separate the two.

Current Relationship - You say you have been with her for 2 years but it almost sounds like you are talking about a distant relative. How does she feel? Is she happy? Does have the same feelings that you are? Do you two communicate about these things? Christmas and her birthday have no bearing on this at all. Either you two make an effort to fix what is broken or there isn't going to be a relationship for the future.

Second issue is the new - old friend who makes you feel happy. If you get out of the first one and jump into a new relationship there are bound to be issues. She makes you feel happy but you need to make sure you aren't masking that because you are with someone other than the current girlfriend who doesn't make you feel happy. Spend some time getting to know new-old friend if that is the route you take. People who jump into relationships before they know the person then are surprised when there are issues crack me up.

Lastly - don't cheat. If you don't want to work things out with current girlfriend then end it. I don't get cheating, won't get cheating, and won't ever cheat.

Deal with your current relationship, and give yourself plenty of time if you decide its not what you want before you go looking for another one to make yourself feel good.

Unhappiness is not an excuse to cheat, or do the wrong thing.

I would never cheat on my girlfriend. We have tried to sort things out before, she always says she will change, and it has changed for a while, but then it seems to slump back to how it was before. The last time this happened was about 4 weeks ago, and to be fair she has stuck to her word, but I do not feel the same about the relationship anymore. She is still happy with our relationship, I haven't told her how I feel at the moment as she is at Uni, I would want to do it face to face. This new friend just makes me feel the way my current girlfriend did when we first got together. But I don't even know if she feels the same, and if I did find out that she didn't like me in that way, would my feelings about my current relationship change? I am really confused about the whole thing. I want to tell my friend how I feel about her, but I just feel this is wrong while I am still in a relationship. I want to know how she feels too!

If you find out this other girl likes you, then you'll be leaving your current girlfriend for the wrong reasons.

I don't get why you need to make sure you have another girl lined up before you leave one. If you're unhappy then leave if this other girl doesn't end up liking you back then move on.