Hi, Im 18, and I'm about to have sex with my boyfriend for the 1st time. I love him and for the last 2 years he has completely respected my choice to be a virgin and now I want to give myself to him. Im not looking to have a crazy sexual experience my 1st time just me and him. Im very worried about the whole pain aspect of sex. I don't know if this is possible but is there a way to reduce the pain at all? Some of my friends said they have no pain so again does it vary from person to person. My biggest concern is I'm going to hate my 1st time and not want to have sex again. Ive Talked to him about all of this and he's very supportive and told me I have control and he's going to be gental and he doesn't want to hurt me... Any Advice is welcome!

Well, let's see:
Pain during intercourse, especially during one's first, is due to three main reasons

►He has a very large penis (Length (8+ inches) or width(4+ inches)
If he does, you should strech your vaginal opening using your fingers and do it missionary slow.

►tight hymen (never used tampons, for example)
There really is no way around this. Just... as he inserts his penis into your vagina, ask that he go VERY SLOWLY.

►being worried / stressed out
You should try to be as relaxed as you can. If you are trying to have sex knowing that your parents could burst in any minute is NOT a good idea AT ALL.


Also: Know that your first time will probably be great as long as you voice what you want.
Best of wishes!

Its is not going to be as bad as you think. You are probably going to be so nervous that the pain is going to take a backseat. The important thing to remember is to use protection and take is slow. Talk about what will happen if you get pregnant, a disease, or any other thing that is on your mind. Make sure all cards are on the table before you do it because once all the toothpaste is out the tube you can't put it back in. Please rate this answer

What some couples do is go get STD-tested together. Maybe an option?

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Originally Posted by gejoe

If he has waited this long, why not talk marriage? Is he mr right? anyway, hold on to your virginity, till your married. you will thank me later.

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Will she thank you later if they find they are sexually incompatible and cannot enjoy a sex life together?

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Originally Posted by kepi

What some couples do is go get STD-tested together. Maybe an option?

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If Im a Virgin what good is getting an std test?? How is that going to cause less pain :confused:

Well I can tell you that it depends on the individual... My first time was traumatic because of the pain the first, second, third, and fourth time. I also bleed for like a week during and afterwards but that doesn't happen to everyone. You can also use a lubricant to have easier penetration. That's the only thing you can do but if your that scared maybe your not ready.

It isn't that bad... it feels kind of like a pop. Just makes sure that the first couple times he goes slow... good luck, and use protection.

Hiyaa,
Its great your going 2 lose your virginity 2 some who loves and respects u! So no matter what, even if there is a little pain, it will be a special moment 2 remember! Its important that you are relaxed and try not 2 tense! I suggest a bit of foreplay and lots of passionate kisses 2 get you in the mood! U could even try using lubricant, its great and really helpful, it just slides in :)
Relax and have fun anyway!!
And use protection x

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Originally Posted by BigCityDreams007

If Im a Virgin what good is getting an std test??? How is that going to cause less pain :confused:

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It depends what you mean by "virgin"
If you have had oral sex, you could have been exposed to STDs, for example. Or Manual sex..