What do I do, we are engaged and have been together 1 year and 4 months. I love him and he loves me.Last night he told me he doesn't find me as attractive as when we first were together because I have gained 7 kilos.(I have lost 3 now, so up by 4). He said my thighs and hips turn him off. I was very hurt and feelings are if you feel like that about me now, what if I gain more wieght in 3 years or 5 years time. Will he end up being disgusted with me... if he already is not as attracted to me now... he too has gained weight but it doesn't bother me, I find myself more attracked to him today then we first met.

Hi Aussiegirl29,

This is so sad to be hearing this... what is wrong with love been unconditional. I know that you said that you both love each other so much but does he really love you within his heart or is it just routine for him since it has been a while now. What you guys really need to do is to go and watch a movie have something nice - like a picnic down at the park and discuss on what is going on. I mean one hell of a deep and meaningful or you my dear are going to end up been in hospital very sick. All the best Aussiegirl

He is totally wrong and if he is losing interest, he would if you had lost weight and was looking better.

This sounds like a normal man, who is losing interest and wants to pass the blame to someone else, so he is not at fault

And what will happen when you get some wrinkles and your hair turns gray and then white and your muscles sag and get flabby? What if you lose the use of a limb or even end up in a wheelchair? What if you get cancer and lose a breast or have a hysterectomy? What if you become bedridden? Will he love you then?

Wow men today are amazing, they think they could just say and do anything they want. Well honey go to my questions. You will be shocked. Ive been brainwashed for 17 yrs just from my husband. Thought that's how things were. Over the summer met a single dad who him and I became friends. He helped me refind myself again. So please take my advice scare him, take the ring off let him question why u did that. Tell him well not sure where are life will go from here. Start letting him has self-esteem issues. Show him your better then him. You don't need to here negative crap like that. And if you start a marriage off like that. You will either get really sick from not eating. Or do the opp. Eat too much. Depends on you. Treating a woman mean like that is not love. Trust me.

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Originally Posted by soundscrazy

Wow men today are amazing, they think they could just say and do anything they want.

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Really not fair to put all men into one group like that. Not all of us are like that... in fact, most are not.


To the OP... He is a jerk. You should rethink the marriage thing. If he is acting like this now, it's not going to get better any time soon.

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Originally Posted by odinn7q

Really not fair to put all men into one group like that. Not all of us are like that....in fact, most are not.


Why u putting words in my mouth...I didnt put all men one group. Where did I state that. Look if your a guy and your wonderful thats great. Did u read whatvI put It took another great man...to make me find myself. So hello were did I put all men down?


To the OP....He is a jerk. You should rethink the marriage thing. If he is acting like this now, it's not going to get better any time soon.

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Maybe I was to blunt but in all in all. I feel I said the same thing to you but in greater detail. Good Luck what ever u decide.

I think that this girl is just finding it hard at this stage. No not all men are like this, I have a fantastic guy now but I have been hurt like she has now and it is not nice. These type of guys I would call jerks as they are only thinking about their image and what they would look like in front of their friends and other people. Believe me I know been there done that, so it is just best to get out of that situation and really think about what you want in your life and do it for YOURSELF NOT HIM... No guy is worth getting sick over NONE

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Originally Posted by soundscrazy

Why u putting words in my mouth...I didnt put all men one group. Where did I state that. Look if your a guy and your wonderful thats great. Did u read whatvI put It took another great man...to make me find myself. So hello were did I put all men down?

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I didn't put words in your mouth. I quoted what you said and it seemed pretty clear to me. You didn't say "some men"... The way I read it, you were grouping men. Maybe that's not what you meant but that's what you posted. So hello, that's what your post said.

Hi there,
I had my boyfriend saying he doesn't find me attractive either but that was during an argument. We have been together for 10 years though and our relationship isn't as it was at th beginning of course. I am not saying the passion is dead but we have had situations that made us really stressed recently etc. I know how upsetting it is , especially when my boyfriend isn't exactly very fit or anything like that, I am not fat at all either, he just said our relationship was getting to the stage we were more like brother and sister.
We are still together, trying to save what's left of our love , And I hope it will work .