He never looks at other women or comment.He's been saying this for 5 years from the beginning of our affair.There are people out there like him .I've searched a lot. Those have forums and there is a term for it.There is no proof of he's lying.. he tried to convince me a million times.He has sworn in every way.His friends and my relatives know the issue and believe him.But I can't. I know there are people out there and it gives me a relief but I can't trust him because he's a male. Even I found some males feeling this way... Why am I so bothered with that?Cause I feel the same way.He is the only handsome man for me.He says you're the only beautiful woman for me. I know my feelings so there is no doubt of myself.but my only proof about him is his words and behaviours. I can't get inside his head to learn if he's telling the truth and it's eating me. Help me please.Please don't talk about human nature. I feel no attraction towards other men,I'm sure of it. If it happens to me,and as I said I found people experiencing it like me-male and female-,it is possible. But the problem is it seems to me it's not possible for my husband.Even I believe the other males saying this on the net. They complain about their girlfriend's finding other guys attractive, but they don't do it so they feel frustrated and disappointed.

My husband doesn't look at other women or comment. I trust him totally.

Why are you so untrusting?

So do you believe he finds no other women attractive or just accept that he finds others attractive but never comments or looks because of respect?

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Originally Posted by Wondergirl

My husband doesn't look at other women or comment. I trust him totally.

Why are you so untrusting?

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So you believe he finds no other attractive or just acting like this because of respect?

I'm sure he will notice if a woman is attractive, but his idea of attractive is not my idea of attractive. If she is fat and ugly but has long thick shiny hair, he thinks she is attractive. (He loves long hair.) And he doesn't worry if I might find some guy attractive. Neither of us puts blinders or a mask on the other.

Why are you so concerned about this?

The problem is if he said he finds others attractive,I would be disappointed but accept it.But he never says something like that.He gets mad when I call him a liar. I need to trust what he is saying.

Do you notice other men and find some attractive?

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Originally Posted by Wondergirl

Do you notice other men and find some attractive?

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No never.thats why it bothers me a lot

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Originally Posted by shivamirage

No never.thats why it bothers me a lot

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I'm sorry, but I don't believe you. If you don't find other men or women attractive, you have no eyes and no soul.

I don't care you believe or not. There are many people out there like me.I have searched a lot.I found both males and females.there is a term for it.but if you don't believe you can't help.thanks anyway

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Originally Posted by shivamirage

I dont care you believe or not. There are many people out there like me.i have searched a lot.i found both males and females.there is a term for it.but if you dont believe you can't help.thanks anyway

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Please stop lying to yourself. You do not have to pant and fall all over a male slobbering on him in order to notice he is attractive. It can be just an instant, "Oh, he's handsome." If you don't have such instant thoughts, you are dead.

If I showed you photos of two men, one fat and bald and pockmarked in unmatched sloppy clothing and the other muscular and in a nice suit and well-groomed, would your eyes linger on one or the other, and would you have an opinion?

Something like that happens to me a lot. They say this guy is handsome point him and I say which guy.. I can't see attractiveness in men. I register ugliness sometimes but others are regular guy for me.I have been in this way for a long time and there is no nede for denial.in fact if I have felt differently, it is sure easier to accept so there would be nothing to worry.

Noticing each other is what we humans do -- and often there is a judgment attached to our noticing -- that child is well behaved (or not), that teenager is sloppy looking, that young woman needs to scrape off some of her makeup, that heavyset old man needs suspenders, that priest looks very official in his robes, that starlet is gorgeous and talented and has a great future, etc. Recognizing cuteness and beauty, and yes, ugliness, is part of it all. And our observations flow into when we look at animals and buildings and cars and virtually anything we see. It's just part of our humanity.

So if your man notices another woman is attractive, whether he comments on it to you, you decide he no longer loves you?

Not the part of my humanity.I didn't say I find nothing or no one attractive.I just don't find men attractive.it shuts off when I'm in an affair.

As I said before, if he told me that I would accept it but feel bad.
But he never says something like that and he swears in every way he is telling the truth.it bothers me not to believe him after everything he did and said.

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Originally Posted by shivamirage

Not the part of my humanity.i didnt say i find nothing or noone attractive.i just dont find men attractive.it shuts off when i'm in an affair.

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So you walk around with your eyes looking at the ground? You can still consider another man attractive. That doesn't say you are being unfaithful to your partner.

So if your man notices another woman is attractive, whether he comments on it to you, you decide he no longer loves you?

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Originally Posted by Wondergirl

So you walk around with your eyes looking at the ground? You can still consider another man attractive. That doesn't say you are being unfaithful to your partner.

So if your man notices another woman is attractive, whether or not he comments on it to you, you decide he no longer loves you?

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As I said before, if he told me that I would accept it but feel bad.
But he never says something like that and he swears in every way he is telling the truth.it bothers me not to believe him after everything he did and said.

Why would you feel bad?

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Originally Posted by Wondergirl

Why would you feel bad?

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Cause I don't do it.It is like cheating for me. But I would accept it if he said it.But the problem is he's not.he did everything to convince me he's not lying. One thing inside me says if somebody is lying he doesn't put much effort to prove that he isn't lying. Only a person who is honest does his best to convince his partner.he says the same."if I had thoughts like that,I would say them to you and drop the subject.it would become totally your problem to accept it,but I don't lie."he says that "It is also my problem now caause I don't want you to think non-existing things about me,I am not that kind of person."