This situation is a little hard to explain. I am 17 almost 18 years old and I met this 21 year old guy who works at my cousins skate rink. I got his number and we've been talking like crazy!! Suddenly he started asking what my mom thought about all this and I true telling him it doesn't matter. He wouldn't listen. So I told him what she thought. Just so you all know my mom is absolutely psycho and I'm not saying that from an angry teen point of view. My mom is so mean and such a liar she doesn't have any friends or family who speak to her. Anyway my mom is racist like crazy. The guy I met is black. My mom is continuously saying rude racist things and the guy eventually found out and immediately started telling me I'm too young for him and we shouldn't be talking and he'll just hit me up sometimes. I finally got his reason out of him. He said if my mom is going to be a crazy he doesn't want to mess. So I guess really I'm just asking what you all think I should do? I know he likes me and I like him. I'm moving out soon so my mom isn't even going to be a problem. I know it's just a guy and ill meet other people but I still would like some opinions. Also please don't judge about age difference he's not that much older (3 and a half years) please don't be rude or judgemental! Thank you!

I think you should respect his decision. You are still a teen to him and he does not want to nor should he have to deal with your mom. Three years is not a lot but when one is a teen and the other an adult, you're in different phases of life. You, High School, he's not. He's an adult, you're not.
Leave him alone.

I think in this situation you have to determine who you should side with. If your mom is always like this she may not change. But if you truly like him you should try to stick up for him.

If he does not want to be with you, you leave him alone. That is too much drama and you are too young for him anyway. He knows this.

I agree

You're not too young. Age is just a number, and at the end of the day, 3 years is nothing! My boyfriend and I are have a 2/3 year age gap and we're fine and lasted a year. With regards to your mum, follow your heart, if needs must, keep it a secret. You're nearly an adult and she doesn't control you, you're your own person :)! At the end of the day, of you like this guy enough, and he likes you, chase him. Don't let him go, because you'll regret it. You go girl!

Age is more than a number if you're talking about a minor and an adult. She is living in her mother's house, being supported by her and it is irresponsible to tell her to deceive her mother. When she is out of her house taking care of herself, then she can do as she pleases.
Besides the guys wants to back off from her. She ought to do it.

I would agree with you 50 years ago. Times have changed and respect goes both ways. Why should this young girl have to suffer because of her mother? She said she's nearly 18, therefore she will no longer be a 'minor'. If the guy was 33, then yes, age would be more of a problem. If they get on well, age, race and her mother should not get in the way! So she should never talk to someone with a different ethnic background because her mums racist and she doesn't want to deceive her? Racism is against the law, fighting for someone you love isn't.

This is not about racism. You should not be telling the girl who lives with her mother, under the financial responsibility of her mother, to be sneaking around.
When she is 18 and living in her own place she can do as she pleases. She does not love him she just likes him. She can wait until she's 18.
Beside the guy wants to chill the relationship, she should.

I can tell her my advise, because I have free will. Just like she does. So just because I have said what I have done, and what I would do again will not necessarily mean she will take the same path as me. If this guy was going to get her in to any type of trouble, then I think she shouldn't touch him with a barge pole. But if she, and her brother like him, why should anything stop her?
She should talk to him, explain she wants to move out etc and say they'll take things slowly. If he still wants nothing to do with her, they should try being friends (which could also lead to something more in the long run).
So, let me understand your argument. She does obviously not agree with her mothers opinion, and she is making her unhappy, yet she should abide by her rules because of DNA and money? If her mother wanted to protect her from whatever, she shouldn't be pushing her away. Give the boy a chance. So what your mum doesn't know who you go shopping or to the cinema with? As long she's keeping safe and out of trouble it doesn't matter. Her daughter should t suffer because she's psycho.

Sometimes you got to do what you want to do, no matter what others think. If some people don't like this so called 'age gap' tell them where to go. The people that care about you the most will want you to be safe and happy. My friend who's 19 was with her boyfriend of 26 for 2 years. They only broke up as she went to university on the other side of the country. They had no problems concerning age, and people had no problems with it. The days when age, race, class and gender decided what was a legitimate relationship was, was dead, buried and forgotten before the 90's even began, 22 years on, the older generations need to catch up as stop judging.

She is not grown and on her own. When that happens she can do as she pleases. All I'm saying is she lives in her mother's home and she is not yet 18. She can have a conversation with her mom, tell her how she feels. When she turns 18 and is in her own place she can do as she pleases but sneaking around is wrong.
At this point mom is not the problem. The young man has backed off .

Thank you so much for your input and not completely judging me(: your advise has helped a ton and actually this guy and I have worked things out! So I'm very happy about that. Anyway I just wanted to say thank you a ton!

AbsolutKrusty thank you for being positive and sensitive in a way(: I appreciate it!

No problem! Just shows if you want something bad enough you'll get it! Happy for you and glad it's worked out :)

I'm a little confused? Yesterday the guy (josh) and I established I'm his girlfriend. He's my boyfriend. He sent hearts and all this mushy gushy stuff on Skype last night. He didn't go to bed all night he was at a party. Now I'm not sure what his problem was today, maybe lack of sleep or hungover? Idk but he kept telling me to stop "crushin" on him. I'm his girlfriend though? I told him to go take a nap and we will talk later. It's been HOURS and he still hasn't gotten back to me. Anything I should do other than wait for him to answer his phone?

Maybe he'd been drinking and that is why he said you re his girlfriend.
Don't do a thing. There is nothing to do.
I know you don't want to hear this, but I think it is a waste of time. One minute he wants to coo lit with you then the next you're his girl. Sounds flaky to me.

Okay thank you! I'll just wait and see I guess...

The guy is right. He is telling you from the beginning what the right thing to do is. Think with your head, not your feelings. It's important that you find someone whom your mom will accept. If he has told you that he's not comfortable then don't push him. Wake up! The whole "I really like him" thing is so immature. It would be really beneficial for you to stop making decisions based on how things make you feel, and start basing them on your intellect, reason, and logic. This will take you much further in life, and save you tons of pain. The heart is deceitful above all things. Be strong and let it go. Interracial relationships come with much more drama as well. It will be a lot harder on both of you. It's not easy like a same race relationship is. Really think about this.

I was able to speak with him finally and he said I am his girlfriend and he was just having a bad day yesterday and he really just needed to be alone. So thank you for your input and we'll see how things go from now on(: and I understand there will be more problems with different race relationships but I'm not going to give up yet. If there are too many problems and obstacles then I'll have to make a change