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-   -   How to fix insecurities in a relationship? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=714245)

  • Nov 4, 2012, 10:33 PM
    amsu0203
    How to fix insecurities in a relationship?
    I have been dating my boyfriend for almost three months now. I am head over heels for him. He's the sweetest guys I have ever met and tells me he feels the same way about me. I believe him but I have some insecurity issues that I need to deal with before I ruin our relationship... which I definitely do not want to happen. I have had a few really bad relationships in the past, they were abusive, they cheated on me, and lied to me all of the time. My current boyfriend does not deserve for me to bring those insecurities out on him. How do I stop myself from getting so jealous and not truting him?
  • Nov 4, 2012, 10:35 PM
    Wondergirl
    Get your act together. How can you get rid of those insecurities and trust again? See a counselor perhaps for a few sessions?

    Make some rules for yourself and obey them, like no checking his phone messages or getting his passwords for phone or computer.
  • Nov 8, 2012, 02:24 AM
    swtdr34m3r
    I believe that if you really want to get over these issues you must first learn a method to control your emotions and impulses. Such as breathing techniques or counting to a certain number before saying anything. This will stop you from saying things you don't mean or picking unwanted fights over small emotional problems that should easily be dealt with.

    Wonder girl has a great idea, set up boundaries for yourself and STICK TO THEM! =) it will help you in the long run, and don't forget that one of the most important things you can do is be open and honest with your boyfriend. If he truly cares about you, he will do his best to help support you even with all your insecurities. If you are open and honest with him,he should and usually will reciprocate that honestly and openness, proving that you can trust him.

    if it is a problem you don't feel comfortable talking to your boyfriend about, there is always psychiatrists/councilors to help as well as any of your really good friends you trust enough to open up to.

    good luck!
  • Nov 8, 2012, 09:43 PM
    amsu0203
    Thanks for the tips! I will deff give them all a try.

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