Ask Me Help Desk - Relationship birthed in sin.

Relationship birthed in sin.

I committed adultery. I'm so ashamed of what I have done. Married 16 years and fell in love with another woman. My ex wife has forgiven me and has moved on. I'm very happy for her. My children are all adults and have forgiven me. More importantly my Lord has forgiven me. But, I'm in Love with the woman I committed this horrible sin with. I wish to be with her forever. My question is: This relationship being birthed in sin, can it last? Is there a chance for it to last? We both are Christians and Love the Lord! She is ashamed for her participation as well. She is seeking the Lord as well as I. Not for the desire of being together, but for salvation and forgiveness from our Lord!

How do you fall in love with someone else when you are married?

What is her marital situation?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Wondergirl

What is her marital situation?

Does it matter... it was his wife... I'm confused.. not meaning to b rude.. but if you are married you should never evn b in a situation to where you fall in love with someone else. She was his wife..

Quote:

Originally Posted by tink524288

Does it matter... it was his wife...I'm jus confused.. not meaning to b rude.. but if you are married you should never evn b in a situation to where you fall in love with someone else. She was his wife..

No, not in an ideal, perfect world; we are still human and not yet in heaven. Rather than point fingers and judge (also a sin), how do we look for and find God's love in this situation?

He has already forgiven Joelle7464. What is the next step to take?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Wondergirl

No, not in an ideal, perfect world; we are still human and not yet in heaven. Rather than point fingers and judge (also a sin), how do we look for and find God's love in this situation?

He has already forgiven Joelle7464. What is the next step to take?.

If every time we sin.. we just ask for forgiveness.. and he forgives... then what's the point.. as in this situation.. saying vows under god.. and he sins.. and now holding a promising relationship with her and was forgiven... I just feel people still sin knowing they will be forgiven by god when asked..?

Quote:

Originally Posted by tink524288

If everytime we sin .. we just ask for forgiveness ..and he forgives... then what's the point..as in this situation..saying vows under god.. and he sins.. and now holding a promising relationship with her and was forgiven...I just feel people stil sin knowing they wil be forgiven by god whn asked..??

He has forgiven even before we ask.

So what is your solution in all this?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Wondergirl

He has forgiven even before we ask.

So what is your solution in all this?

There is no solution. He as a "christian" I don't feel should be on here asking for forgiveness frm god when he was well aware that what he was doing before he proceeded with it was a sin.. That he would be forgiven for.. no harm done.. besides to his wife that had no choice but to forgive and move on after she spent her life keeping her vow to god.. the same one he did not

So, you are saying that a real Christian never sins. Only "christians" sin and are not to receive forgiveness from anyone.

OR, if a Christian knows it is a sin and does it anyway, he should not be forgiven and has become a "christian."

Quote:

Originally Posted by Wondergirl

So, you are saying that a real Christian never sins. Only "christians" sin and are not to receive forgiveness from anyone.

OR, if a Christian knows it is a sin and does it anyway, he should not be forgiven and has become a "christian."

No I'm not saying any of that.. I'm just saying If god has all ready forgave and they are moving on a path to a new future why is he asking how to live with it... you already are

Quote:

Originally Posted by tink524288

No I'm not saying any of that.. I'm just saying If god has all ready forgave and they are moving on a path to a new future why is he asking how to live with it... you already are

Who is asking?

I am doing what?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Wondergirl

Who is asking?

I am doing what?

The person who this post is about is asking and your doing nothing..?

I asked what is her marital situation, but the OP has not come back to answer.

Just a few words:

David and Bathsheba.

The relationship came about in pretty much the same way, except that David also had her husband murdered. Yet, they married, and her son Solomon inherited the kingdom.

Oh yeah, tink524288, you're not helping. If you don't understand how a person can fall in love with someone else when they're married, your experience level is minuscule enough that you're not qualified to comment.

Joelle,

If your ex wife has moved on, you are available and the woman you are in love with is not married and a christian, I can't see anything wrong with it. What is done is done. I'm sure you have lived with the consequences of your actions already and the Lord does not hold any sin against you. He paid for all of them at calvary. I would pray about it and pray with her as well. Take it slow and see what happens. I wouldn't continue in a sexual sin with her and expect the Lord to bless it but like Dwashbur pointed out, it happened in the bible with David; a man after God's own heart. God is good, he always works everything out for our good... EVEN our sins if we trust him to. David and Bathsheba gave birth to Solomon who is in the direct line (genealogy) of our Lord Jesus Christ. Only God can take our mess and make it a blessing.

A few thoughts for consideration. As the marriage is dissolved (on scriptural grounds, adultery), both are free to remarry.

Regarding the example of David & Bathsheba there are some additional considerations. In response to the grave sins, the prophet Nathan provided a response from God:
“Here I am raising up against you calamity out of your own house.” (2Sa 12:1-12, NWT)

The child borne from their adultery died (2Sa 12:15-23). David's son Amnon raped his half sister Tamar and was killed by her brother (2Sa 13:1-33). Another son, Absalom disgraced his father by having relations with one of Davids concubines and tried to usurp the thrown and was killed (2Sa 15:1–16:22).

While king David ultimately proved favorable in gods eyes despite his grave sin with Bathsheba and the murder of her husband Uriah, god did not bless his marriage with Bathsheba.

Of course this situation is different so I'm not saying what god's view of the situation is, but I though it noteworthy to see the David & Bathsheba example in its entirety.

I would suggest consideration of this scripture:
"“I have the right to do anything,” you say—but not everything is beneficial. “I have the right to do anything”—but not everything is constructive." (1 Corinthians 10:23, NIV)

Gracey,

David lived under the law. He didn't live under grace and yet God was STILL merciful. Yes it is true God told David the sword would not depart from his house ( or something like that) but again... looking at the entire picture is still beautiful. David under the law committed an act that demanded death. AND still he received God's mercy... how much MORE do WE receive under Grace? We do not live under the law tempered by mercy anymore. No... What Christ has done for us is MUCH more.
Forgetting those things which are behind... press on, press on.

ClassyT, I agree, god is very merciful to us now and showed much mercy to those in the past as well.

From understanding what you wrote in here I strongly believed that you are an Unfaithful christian not in the sense that no one is 'sinless' and of course we all fall short in the Lords presence but in the sense that your faith in God is up to a level only when you first gave yourself to Christ or its excitement.Your faith stops right there at that level... when it should be an every second of a minute personel show of character Truthfulness to God. You thought being a Christian is a strength in itself... again wrong!

If I went back to your story you said ''.....most importantly God has forgiven me!'' How do you know this? Then you say how you still deeply in love with that woman... and intead of showing a strong will and robust biblical understanding you asked these questions that you yourself have the answer :1)This relationship being birthed in sin, can it last? 2)Is there a chance for it to last? Then you went on with this last two lines as these... '' She is seeking the Lord as well as I. Not for the desire of being together, but for salvation and forgiveness from our Lord! ''
Those 2 sentences sums you up... you are completely lost in emotional love and does not have the measure to Having Faith in God. If you had then you would seek forgiveness to your wife and do your best to resurrect your marriage so your children can still have the same father and same family... it can be done,having faith in God!

Thirdtime, thanks for your response, but this thread is several months old, and I doubt that the poster is going to see it. He didn't even come back when he was asked some questions last fall.