I am pregnant by a man who is married and has children. Up until last week he said he would not be involved with the baby even though I offered to work with him so he could be. Now he is threatening to try and have my rights taken away so she can adopt the baby, he is basing this on the fact that I am a single mom with other kids and that they can provide a more stable home then I can. I have a good job with health insurance and have joint custody of my of my other kids. I only have 2 months to go until my due date and am now very stressed out because of this. What are the chances that he could win or that he could take e baby to another state if he were to get main custody. I am a very good mom and provide for my kids and I have a good relationship with my exes.

U have to be able to proof your able to take care of all of your kids and the soon to come baby and have a stable home... I believe that even if he was to take your baby by law you have the right to see your child unless you have a bad mother record

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Originally Posted by adelinosa

u have to be able to proof ur able to take care of all of ur kids and the soon to come baby and have a stable home.... i believe that even if he was to take ur baby by law u have the right to see ur child unless u have a bad mother record

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I can take care of them. I have a steady job and have been there for 7 yrs. I work 36 hrs a week and it will be my mother who watches the baby while I am at work. I have a good support system that are willing to help if needed. At the current time neither him nor his wife have jobs, when he finally is able to get one it will be as a physician with a unpredictable schedule. He wants her to take over as being the baby's mother and act like I never existed. I have a good history of being a mom, my exes and my ex mother in law are willing to testify on my behalf.

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Originally Posted by Hberry75

I can take care of them. I have a steady job and have been there for 7 yrs. I work 36 hrs a wk and it will be my mother who watches the baby while I am at work. I have a good support system that are willing to help if needed. At the current time neither him nor his wife have jobs, when he finally is able to get one it will be as a physician with a unpredictable schedule. He wants her to take over as being the baby's mother and act like I never existed. I have a good history of being a mom, my exes and my ex mother in law are willing to testify on my behalf.

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I'm not a lawyer but the burden of proof is not on you, it would be on him to prove you cannot take care of the child. Since you are employed and have a good support system, you should be fine.

You have to prove nothing, you will get at least joint custody unless he can prove you unfit and not able to care for child.

He may file for joint custody, ( and may well get it) or at least visits, Unless he is a threat to the children he will get at least visits and perhaps even joint custody.

He can not take the child away from you, unless there is a proven risk.

This is a common threat, he is doing that, most likely to try and scare you from filing child support, I would guess that issue was part of the threats

As noted, this is a common threat. But taking a child from the mother is very rare. I would not stress over it. You state you are successfully raising other children which should be enough. Courts generally will not look at who can provide the better home, but whether one parent can't provide.

He can't do anything until the child is born. As soon as that happens, I would file for primary physical custody and child support.

I have offered for him to be a part of the baby's life from day one and he stood by not being able to do that until I was 7 months pregnant when I gave him the establishment of paternity papers to sign for. He refused, however I have since had him served. He said that either I have her and he has no contact or he has her I have no contact. I obviously am not going to give away my child. He says I am selfish because they can give her a better life simply because I am single. They have no plans on staying in the same state as we are in now, he is currently looking for jobs elsewhere. I asked him if was willing to look into getting a job here so we can both be a part of her life and he said no. I will definitely file for physical custody, it is just very stressful to have someone threaten to try and take your baby away from you. I am hoping that he realizes that fighting will only hurt everyone involve and be willing to work with me.

Again, don't worry about threats. Most likely he doesn't want to have to pay support. But it doesn't work that way.

He is doing that because he does not want you to file for child support, honestly this is done all the time, our site is full of 1000's and 1000s of post exactly like this one