Ask Me Help Desk - Perect but feeling like something is missing

there is this guy I have been going out with for 2.5 years I'm in college and he graduated and is working for a great company and makes a great amount. Already got a raise and is doing so well at his work place won many awards at 22. My family loves him our families get along. I'm a jr in college. He's my best friend in the world. Genuine and loves me. Has done some amazing fairy tale stuff for our anniversaries, valentines days and on random days surprises me and all. He's currently working in a different state and I see him once a month and this is only for a little while. He surprises me sends me gifts we talk every night and he's great. He's one of the best. I cannot ask for someone better who understands me and genuinly cares about me more than him. He's put up with so much etc. But I've always felt this off and on at times I feel something is missing. Like our convos seem boring I don't know. I feel like if I get married id be happy cause he's great but I feel like I woulnt be satisfied. Am I just getting used to the fact that he's so great so it doesn't seem special or anything? I mean he never hurts me and never in anyway shape or form ever has all this time he's incredible. I love him a lot why do I feel that way at times do? Am I just a tool?

That is completely natural. I go through the same "dry spells" with my boyfriend. Everything is Perfect and nothing will change, but all of a sudden you feel bored. The love is still there, but for a few days at a time you seem uninterested. The way I relax about it is by thinking its just because you get so used to the easy going natural feeling with him that it's like the chase is gone? It may be that you're used to previous boyfriends giving you a hard time and making it easy to understand why they are so bad. With your current boyfriend everything is just how you would want it to be, and there is nothing that is out of place(red flag) so its your natural instinct to protect yourself. When things are going really well, we always look for the bad because we thinks "it's coming" anyway. I would just try to enjoy the good and talk with him about it. Who knows maybe he feels the same?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mommydear89

That is completely natural. I go through the same "dry spells" with my boyfriend. Everything is Perfect and nothing will change, but all of a sudden you feel bored. The love is still there, but for a few days at a time you seem uninterested. The way I relax about it is by thinking its just because you get so used to the easy going natural feeling with him that it's like the chase is gone? It may be that you're used to previous boyfriends giving you a hard time and making it easy to understand why they are so bad. With your current boyfriend everything is just how you would want it to be, and there is nothing that is out of place(red flag) so its your natural instinct to protect yourself. When things are going really well, we always look for the bad because we thinks "it's coming" anyway. I would just try to enjoy the good and talk with him about it. Who knows maybe he feels the same?

You hit it right on! Thanks so much!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rize

...we talk every night and he's great... but i've always felt this off and on at times i feel something is missing. Like our convos seem boring idk.

So this is the only concrete evidence that "something is missing". Relax. Nothing is missing, it's just that you two created a nightly phone-call routine and ran out of stuff to say.

Only call him if you have something to say that you believe he'll be interested in, otherwise, enjoy time alone.

Be honest and tell your boyfriend that the conversations are boring. I'm certain he feels the same way.

Personal space is extremely important in a relationship. It allows you to be an individual while still sharing a life with someone else.

Quote:

Originally Posted by slapshot_oi

So this is the only concrete evidence that "something is missing". Relax. Nothing is missing, it's just that you two created a nightly phone-call routine and ran out of stuff to say.

Only call him if you have something to say that you believe he'll be interested in, otherwise, enjoy time alone.

Be honest and tell your boyfriend that the conversations are boring. I'm certain he feels the same way.

Personal space is extremely important in a relationship. It allows you to be an individual while still sharing a life with someone else.

Thank you so much you guys are awesome