Hi

I've been seeing this girl for a little over a year. She left a boyfriend of 3 years to be with me. She is 25, I am 40 and divorced twice with 3 children. She is scared her family will be mad at her because of my previous failed marriages. For this reason our relationship remains a secret. She is a very caring loving lady and tells me she loves me very deeply.

She remained friends with her ex which has been an issue since it is very clear he still wants to be with her. She is always honest about seeing him and I don't doubt her when she tells me she only wants to be his friend.

However he recently shows he is making a big effort to win her back which makes me a little uncomfortable. I feel if he knew about me he would be angry and not the friend she thinks he is.

Because of her reluctance to admit me to her family and ex I am feeling a little worthless and hurt. It causes the same repetitive argument. I have tried talking to her but she is stubborn and will not budge. I finally brought our relationship to an end today as I feel I can no longer accept being a secret. I love her very dearly and am hoping I have made a sensible decision that may make her understand my feelings

Relationships shouldn't be a secret, and leaving one person for another is also wrong. She sounds very immature.

I would have done the very same thing. Tough decision, but a great one.