I like this girl in my class and she likes this other kid. She used to like me and we were boyfriend girlfriend. What should I do.

She's off limits now. Do you talk to any other girls?

I kind of do but no one really appreciates me for what I am. This year I have been working harder in wrestling so she likes me. But I am very shy around people.

Here's a secret about girls --

They like to talk. They want boys (and other girls) to listen. Sharpen up your listening skills, and girls will think you are the best conversationalist in the whole world.

From Active Listening - Communication Skills Training from MindTools.com --

Becoming an Active Listener

There are five key elements of active listening. They all help you ensure that you hear the other person, and that the other person knows you are hearing what they say.
1. Pay Attention

Give the speaker your undivided attention, and acknowledge the message. Recognize that non-verbal communication also "speaks" loudly.

Look at the speaker directly.
Put aside distracting thoughts.
Don't mentally prepare a rebuttal!
Avoid being distracted by environmental factors. For example, side conversations.
"Listen" to the speaker's body language.

2. Show That You're Listening

Use your own body language and gestures to convey your attention.

Nod occasionally.
Smile and use other facial expressions.
Note your posture and make sure it is open and inviting.
Encourage the speaker to continue with small verbal comments like yes, and uh huh.

3. Provide Feedback

Our personal filters, assumptions, judgments, and beliefs can distort what we hear. As a listener, your role is to understand what is being said. This may require you to reflect what is being said and ask questions.

Reflect what has been said by paraphrasing. "What I'm hearing is," and "Sounds like you are saying," are great ways to reflect back.
Ask questions to clarify certain points. "What do you mean when you say." "Is this what you mean?"
Summarize the speaker's comments periodically.

Tip:
If you find yourself responding emotionally to what someone said, say so, and ask for more information: "I may not be understanding you correctly, and I find myself taking what you said personally. What I thought you just said is XXX; is that what you meant?"
4. Defer Judgment

Interrupting is a waste of time. It frustrates the speaker and limits full understanding of the message.

Allow the speaker to finish each point before asking questions.
Don't interrupt with counter arguments.

5. Respond Appropriately

Active listening is a model for respect and understanding. You are gaining information and perspective. You add nothing by attacking the speaker or otherwise putting him or her down.

Be candid, open, and honest in your response.
Assert your opinions respectfully.
Treat the other person in a way that you think he or she would want to be treated.

And this -- Listening (Encyclopedia of Management) Study Guide & Homework Help - eNotes.com

I only see her during school hours so should I stop playing with my friends once and go talk to her? Or should I ask my cousin to tell her because they are best friends and hang out a lot

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Originally Posted by SamuelW17

I only see her during school hours so should I stop playing with my friends once and go talk to her? Or should I ask my cousin to tell her because they are best friends and hang out a lot

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Talk to the ex who has the new boyfriend?

How should I engage her. What do I start talking to her about.

You don't. She likes someone else now. Leave her alone and make friends with other girls.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Wondergirl

You don't. She likes someone else now. Leave her alone and make friends with other girls.

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I really do not like any other girls in the class and I think she does not like me because I am one of the smallest kid in 7th grade

You are looking for excuses. At your age, emotions and love interests change as often as day to day. Within a month, she will "be in love with" someone else. Be nice to all the girls. And do your schoolwork.

Ok. Tomorrow I will try to talk to her but If it does not work I will start hanging out with some different girls. Do you have any more advice.

Why are you going to talk to her?

I think she still likes me but does not show it.

Do me a huge favor, please. Let me know what happened. Okay?

I will do that. And one more question should I avoid the new boy she likes.

No. Act normal. Do you know him otherwise, besides being her new squeeze?

Ya I know him but I never really became good friends with him but I still talk to him.

Just be yourself.

Ok do you have anymore advice or is that all

That's all. We can rethink this and make a new strategy after you talk to her.