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-   -   A real hard way to end it. (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=708473)

  • Oct 11, 2012, 07:56 PM
    hunter27
    A real hard way to end it.
    After 6.5 years my girlfriend is leaving. She told me she wanted marriage and kids years ago. I was just not ready but I loved her plenty to marry her. What I mean is I lost a few jobs, started to hate my career choices and hated my life because of it.

    As all of this was happening she told me how emotionaly detached I was how I did not do the little things to keep her happy, and I see that now and now I'm losing her a woman I truly love.

    I've told her this and she is just cold. What do I do, or what can I do?
  • Oct 11, 2012, 09:12 PM
    teacherjenn4
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by hunter27 View Post
    No she really wants her space........she left for TN ..to visit friends and fam....she gone for a week...im not going to contact her...ill just be pushing her
    Let her have her space. If she wants to get back together with you, then she will. The ball is in her court.
  • Oct 11, 2012, 09:17 PM
    hunter27
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by teacherjenn4 View Post
    Let her have her space. If she wants to get back together with you, then she will. The ball is in her court.
    I agree... thats what I'm doing... my ? Is when she gets home do I try to talk to her... or do I leave be for she gets home to keep the giving space thing active... im just afraid if I stay to talk I may be pressureing her
  • Oct 11, 2012, 09:19 PM
    teacherjenn4
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by hunter27 View Post
    I agree......thats what im doing...my ? Is when she gets home do i try to talk to her...or do i leave be for she gets home to keep the giving space thing active.......im just afraid if i stay to talk i may be pressureing her
    Leave her alone. She will contact you if, and when she wants to.
  • Oct 11, 2012, 09:24 PM
    hunter27
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by teacherjenn4 View Post
    Leave her alone. She will contact you if, and when she wants to.
    If I was not typing this on my fone id be able to get into more details... my thumbs can't handel it... we been living together 6 + years have a house together.. we rent... a dog... our own little family... we built so much together.its just crushing k owing I might be losing it all... I know leaving her alone is all I can do.. but do I wate for her when she gets home or do I find somewhere to stay until she contacts me
  • Oct 11, 2012, 09:26 PM
    teacherjenn4
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by hunter27 View Post
    If i was not typing this on my fone id be able to get into more details .....my thumbs can't handel it..........we been living together 6 + years have a house together ..we rent.....a dog.....our own little family.....we built so much together.its just crushing k owing i might be loosing it all.....
    Give her time to be away. She will either miss you or not. It's up to her now. If she comes back, you both need to work on your relationship.
  • Oct 11, 2012, 09:30 PM
    hunter27
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by teacherjenn4 View Post
    Give her time to be away. She will either miss you or not. It's up to her now. If she comes back, you both need to work on your relationship.
    ...

    I agree.. I don't know if I'm reading your message right... so do I talk to her when she gets home or vanish snd wate for her... im sorry if I'm making you repeat
  • Oct 11, 2012, 09:32 PM
    teacherjenn4
    You go on with your life. Leave her alone. She will contact you if she wants to.
  • Oct 11, 2012, 09:41 PM
    hunter27
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by hunter27 View Post
    ....

    I agree..i dont know if im reading ur message right.... so do i talk to her when she gets home or vanish snd wate for her.......im sorry if im making u repeat
    Hey
    Thank u for your time
  • Oct 22, 2012, 10:51 AM
    hunter27
    There is a another guy
    My girl and I have been together for 6+ years... for the last wile we have been having problems.. she tried to leave me... well to make a long story short we are talking and working on us but while we were having problems another guy was comforting her... he finally told her how much he likes her... now she is torn between us... does she try to make it work with the guy she has been with for years or try somtbing new... she has been pritty open about all this with me but I sometimes find some details I didn't know.. wich hurts but she doing a good job of being truthful... she tells me she told him to back off and you saw the text... she not lying.. she allso told him to stop with all contact with her... he still is trying... this guy is telling her how he loves her and how he hopes her and I don't workout... slightly pushing her to leave... how should I respond to all this
  • Oct 23, 2012, 12:13 AM
    Campdraftqueen
    Just tell her your feelings towards this. She will find the right thing to do
  • Oct 25, 2012, 07:12 PM
    hunter27
    I tried that she is very cold to me... I even called this guy snd very respectfuly asked if he would back off... I don't believe he is going to... I feel him being in the pictures is helping her make non thought out discussions... she tells me he's not the reason she is leaving... well they text each other iver 5000 times in to mounths... yes over 5000 times... this is our first break... I believe I'm not being given a true chance... what do you guys think
  • Oct 25, 2012, 09:43 PM
    talaniman
    I think its time for you to go and get your act together without her. For 6 and a half years you have been an irresponsible kind of fellow and whether there is another guy or not, she seems intent on leaving. That's your clue to let go and solve your own problems for your own sake.
  • Oct 26, 2012, 06:20 AM
    hunter27
    Well I can agree with that... there is a lot I'm leaving out... to much to type... she wanted me to marry her so badly... for a very long time... I went through a very difficult time in my life.. I was more depressed than I could have ever thought.. it caused tbe main issues with us... I lost to jobs hated my career so bad.. it afected us bad.. now I'm in my right mind again I'm losing her... she tells me that he has nothing to do with this its been happing for a wile... meaning its all stared when I was faltering and falling into depression.. how can she see if I'm still worthy if there is anotber guy tbat is ater her... her parents see he is bing s slime bag in the way her is doing this I see it and some of our friends see it... I believe he is manipulating her mind
  • Oct 26, 2012, 06:35 AM
    talaniman
    FOCUS on getting your own act together, mind, body, and soul, and don't worry about what you see as competition, and never use the past as an excuse for your fears now. You have work to do on YOU,just as she has work todo on herself. Let her.

    You are working so hard to impress her instead of working hard to accomplish. When she can see she will, so have something to show that's positive. FOCUS on YOU, NOT the relationship. Its you who must be cool, calm, and collected, and in control so YOU can deal with whatever life throws at you.

    Do this for you and let her handle her business properly.
  • Oct 27, 2012, 09:09 PM
    hunter27
    Welp... I just learned that for mounths she has been talking to this guy building feelings... all while she was next to me in bed.. living with me making me believe she was in my life... while she was asking me for a ring... she was cheating not physically but emotionly... I believe its cheating... what do you guys think

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