My childhood has been seriously messed up as my mum and dad got divorced because my dad was an alcoholic but he is getting much better however I truly hate life at my mums house because my brother never is wrong in my mums eyes so he always sets me up and I love my dad but when they got divorced they agreed I would live with my mum but surely I get a say because I truly dislike my mum and because of it I'm becoming someone I don't want to be resulting in never ending shouting and crying into pillows and there have been many occasions when my friends have had to prsuade me not to end it all but I love my dad so still want to see him but don't actually know how to get the connections to become fostered... Don't know what to do and haven't for ages someone help please.

Being fostered is NOT something you want to happen.
It's a last ditch effort to find a responsible adult to look after minors, not an excuse to avoid your situation.

Thanks its just that since I was little I always felt the same way and always will and I can't even look my mum in the eyes anymore .

Does she complain about things you do? If so, what?

Why do you say you want to 'still see your dad' and be fostered in the same sentence? Why do you think being in foster care will be better than living with your mother?
How old are you?

Yes but I don't actually do them . But it is still non stop

Quote:

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Originally Posted by joypulv

Why do you say you want to 'still see your dad' and be fostered in the same sentence? Why do you think being in foster care will be better than living with your mother?
How old are you?

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Foster care I believe will be so much better because I will not get blamed for stuff I have not done and never stop shouting and someone apart from my dad and friends cares about and I am 13

Kat, the reality of fostering is that not very many parents foster out of love, they do it for the money, and the money isn't very much. That means that you get not much of anything (and if there are biological children, they might get stuff you don't get, and you are treated differently, and yes, that includes getting yelled at). Do you have a cell phone, for example? Who pays the monthly bill? Do you get an allowance?

Also, what sorts of things does your mother blame you for, and yell about?

Quote:

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Originally Posted by joypulv

Kat, the reality of fostering is that not very many parents foster out of love, they do it for the money, and the money isn't very much. That means that you get not much of anything (and if there are biological children, they might get stuff you don't get, and you are treated differently, and yes, that includes getting yelled at). Do you have a cell phone, for example? Who pays the monthly bill? Do you get an allowance?

Also, what sorts of things does your mother blame you for, and yell about?

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Anything really whatever she is mad about I have a phone yes but I bought it on contract and have been saving up for ages to get it I'm supposed to get 2 pounds a week but rarely do I understand what you are saying but because I'm old enough to think for myself do you think I would have a say in who my foster parents could be ?
Thank you by the way

Kat, you are in need of a serious reality check here.

First, you do NOT have a phone on contract as you cannot enter an agreement until you are OVER 18. That's simple UK contract law.
Second, you have NO say in what, where, when or with who you are fostered should it happen.
Third, all you have shown so far is you are a typical self centred teen that simply takes everything and whines when they don't get their own way.
Being a child is not easy as you have a huge amount of learning and growing up to do.
You have a roof over your head, food in your belly and, to cap it all, internet access from a computer. Do you have any idea how privileged this makes you?

So all in all, stop the me, me, me, gimme, gimme, gimme and try seeing things from someone else's view point for a change.
Try running the entire house for a WHOLE week, my bet is you FAIL, miserably.

2 pounds is a lot. When I was young I had a much smaller allowance even in adjusted dollars, and I NEVER got it, because my mother kept a calendar of punishments and put big X's through all the weeks of no allowance. It was Xed out months into the future.

Kat, the reality is indeed money. Children cost money. It's money that could be going to pay bills, or go out to a restaurant or go on a trip. Children really are a sacrifice, a financial one, a work one (shopping, cooking, cleaning, driving, worrying). Parental love is in there somewhere, and unless you are an infant, NO foster parent is going to be showering you with love and sweetness and willingness to do everything for you. You are stuck with your mother. She might be taking all her old grief out on you, sure, all her problems of having an alcoholic husband who couldn't love, couldn't take care of her and you. Try to stay out of her way! I went through something similar.
One thing you can do is ask relatives. You may find one who will take you in, but even the ones who love you will usually say they can't provide for you in their homes.
You won't have an allowance as a foster. And that means no cell phone, nothing...