My 19 year old lived like a pig all summer .clothes all ober room even dirty maxipad on coun ter .now she is in college and wants n o advice or anything from her parents oh and she is dating and has slept with her cousin how handle this

So don't give her any, or tell her if she is living in your house, get over it and not only will it be advice it will be rules.

What does she have that you pay for ? Cell phone, call insurance, a car ? Internet at home, and so on.

Start cuttingit off if she does not do properly, a few hours without her beloved cell phone and most likely she will be cleaning her room.