Hi, I need help. I started dating this guy about 2 months ago and about a month after we started dating he told me that he was not ready for a committed relationship. He said that he had been in 3 back to back serious relationships and he wasn't ready for another. He really backed off for about 3 weeks, but a few nights ago we decided to go out again. He said that what really scared him was that there was so much chemistry between us, and there really was. The thing is I haven't heard from him in 2 days and we usually talk everyday. He was supposed to be with his daughter for the past two days but that has never stopped him from calling me before. Another thing is we work together and he had a fling with one of the girls we work with. I know I should trust him until he proves to be untrustworthy , but it is really hard, and it is really weird that I haven't heard from him. I need help in knowing how to deal with this guy. I really like him a lot and he is the first guy I've been serious with since my last long term relationship a year ago. I really like him and I want to make this work. Please, help me!!

Dear Love Sick,


Trust Me When I Say Don't Become Too Attatched To This Man! He's Been In 3 Relationships Back To Back And Claim They All Were Serious, But Now He Doesn't Want A Serious One, So Back Off! Sweety, He Just Wants Someone To Jump Up And Down On, And Don't Let This Man Make You His Part Time Gig... you'll Get Hurt Very Badly... missqb

From a guys stand point - I wouldn't worry about it. He will call - don't call him. PULL BACK - become unavailable!! Don't return his call. This is if you really like him. The word is CHALLENGE.

Hi there Hmm 3 back to back serious realationship that did not work and not ready to commit. It seem like this guy is running game. He want to be friends but he does not want to commit too you. I have never been a fan of dating a person that you work with. IT wonderful if it works out but if it does not it will create un-need tenison in the workplace. You can allow someone with mixed emotions play with your heart. Take care GOOD Luck!!

Hi, my question is I was in a relationship with a guy for a couple of months and I found out he was a complete player. We work together which I know is a mistake, but he was completely rude to me the other night for no reason at all. He was flirting with me so I gave him my new number with a piece of paper that included a little sexual message (which he used to love). He kept my number and told me that I was "off", whatever that means. Here is the deal, I think he is a piece of and I want nothing to do with him. He has serious issues. However I want him to want me so bad it hurts him. I don't want him to have the satisfaction of knowing he has affected me in any way. I've been told to blow him off and just act like nothing is wrong, flirt with other guys and it will drive him nuts. I don't want attention or anything else from him, but I do want to see him go nuts by not getting attention from me. Help me out guys. What else can I do? I'm not used to playing games so this is new to me. Also, why would he keep my number? Just curious.

Hi there Don't feed into he's games. I think your confused. You think he's a piece of shi* then you turn around and give him your new number. That is playing right into the hands of a player. I'm curious why waste your time and energy on revenge. What goes around come around. Poetic Justice will catch up with him. I would stand clear and move on with my life minus the drama. GOOD LUCK!!

Word!

Keep the drama down sister, act like nothing happened... it's not like you'll earn 1000$ for hurting him, so rather spend your time thinking how to make more money or do something for yourself. There's like a billion things in life I'd rather do than trying to make someone go nuts.

Peace...

First: Check yourself. Your post sounds really confused; you don't want attention "or anything from him" yet you want to drive him wild "noticing how you are'nt trippin over him... contradiction. You are trippin and you want him to notice how you are'nt trippin so you so you can hurt his feelings... Anyway.
The BEST revenge? SUCCESS!! Get on with it. Do YOUR thing, make sure you are taking care of yourself. You will look good, and you will feel good and you will attract good things to you. Concentrate on doing well on your job(maybe secure a promotion?), make some cash, get a new man, be happy, buy yourself flowers, celebrate life. If you can't think of anything to celebrate? Then think of life with HIM and be glad that you dodged that bullet. And DO NOT let him worm his way back, because I know if you do what I say, he'll want in... and you will have the last laugh. Oh, and one more thing, be pleasant to him. Don't give him attitude. That's what he will expect. Be a lady and let your light shine, give him something to think about. Don't be a regular, be a cut above.

As sweet as it sometimes sounds, there is no such thing as sweet revenge. As difficult as it may be, you should just move one and forget about the "player". Revenge is never "even" and can just go back in forth for long periods. The only gratification you really need is that fact that you were able to see that person for who they really were before many years have passed. You hear many stories of people finding about "players" years in the relationship or even marriage. So I am not really an "I for and I" person. The thoughts of revenge stores anger that is not good for yourself. So focus you attention on the positives in your life and those things you can do to improve upon it, and the "player" in time will find his match or not, but will make no difference for time heals all wounds.

This is classic for a young woman. Woman love Jerks. Woman love what they can't have. Woman love a challenge.

You have strong attractions and feelings for this guy. He makes you think you can change him. He isn't boring.

He will break your heart and is probably in reality a complete loser and someone you could NEVER be happy with.

Get on with your life. As I'm sure you've heard the saying "he's just not into you" so move on and give it up-don't play the games you mentioned you never have-why start now?

There is only one thing you should be concentrating on right now... and that's... YOU! Looking over your shoulder in any relationship... is no GOOD! I echo the posts that say, BE NICE, BE A WOMAN.
You do not want to be the woman, that walks into a restaurant or party, where many there MAY be pointing a finger and saying... "Oh, poor girl, cause I had him last week". Your more important than that.

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Originally Posted by lost in love

Hi, my question is I was in a relationship with a guy for a couple of months and I found out he was a complete player. We work together which I know is a mistake, but he was completely rude to me the other night for no reason at all. He was flirting with me so I gave him my new number with a piece of paper that included a little sexual message (which he used to love). He kept my number and told me that I was "off", whatever that means. Here is the deal, I think he is a piece of and I want nothing to do with him. He has serious issues. However I want him to want me so bad it hurts him. I don't want him to have the satisfaction of knowing he has affected me in any way. I've been told to blow him off and just act like nothing is wrong, flirt with other guys and it will drive him nuts. I don't want attention or anything else from him, but I do want to see him go nuts by not getting attention from me. Help me out guys. What else can I do? I'm not used to playing games so this is new to me. Also, why would he keep my number? Just curious.

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Well he still likes you.. I'm in the sam sitchwation me and this guy have been going out over nine months he dumps me for my best friend 5 or more times but all different girls but all my best friends... he keeps dumping me and asking me out.. its so hard too.. but I don't know I have to talk to him about it today too because we might brake up grr I'm sick of this.. but you umm I don't know flirt with a bunch of guys ask to hang out then call a guy and flirt

This is from TWO years ago!! Hello!!

This person has completely moved on. Done with that situation.

It seems like only 2 weeks ago.

I remember this post vividly and it does

Quote:

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Originally Posted by lost in love

Hi, my question is I was in a relationship with a guy for a couple of months and I found out he was a complete player. We work together which I know is a mistake, but he was completely rude to me the other night for no reason at all. He was flirting with me so I gave him my new number with a piece of paper that included a little sexual message (which he used to love). He kept my number and told me that I was "off", whatever that means. Here is the deal, I think he is a piece of and I want nothing to do with him. He has serious issues. However I want him to want me so bad it hurts him. I don't want him to have the satisfaction of knowing he has affected me in any way. I've been told to blow him off and just act like nothing is wrong, flirt with other guys and it will drive him nuts. I don't want attention or anything else from him, but I do want to see him go nuts by not getting attention from me. Help me out guys. What else can I do? I'm not used to playing games so this is new to me. Also, why would he keep my number? Just curious.

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The reason he kept your number is just in case all else fails he already senses your weakness for him. In reality life is so short, you need to spend all of your time getting all the goodness you can out of life, instead of wasting your precious time on a looser. Cut him off permanently or you just might be in a never ending, good for nothing, going nowhere pure physical for him confusing for you sex relationship, the worse kind Morale: Its not unique to be hurt by someone but it is shameful to be hurt by yourself! Move on there is bound to be something good and it does not appear to be him

You need to know where you stand. Ask him what it is he wants from you. Don't let him play you if he does move on.