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-   -   Shy guy can't meet girls (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=70263)

  • Mar 9, 2007, 01:41 AM
    booch
    Shy guy can't meet girls
    I've been single for a while and I can't seem to get over my last girlfriend. It was fairly serious, but complicated. I loved her very much, and still do. I'm not saying I want to forget her, but I would like to get her off my mind - at least a little. However, I can't seem to meet any girls. I have a fairly busy life, and I'm too shy to ask out any girls I do meet. All I want is to go out with someone and have a good time. I'm okay with it not leading to anything. I just want to get a little dressed up, do something nice for a girl, and meet someone new. If you have any suggestions on how to approach girls, or where to meet them I would greatly appreciate it. Thanks.
  • Mar 10, 2007, 03:35 AM
    Scleros
    I have your same problem. But, my "problem" is all in my head. Knowing this, my perspective is different. Perhaps yours needs adjustment.

    Quote:

    Originally Posted by booch
    However, I can't seem to meet any girls.

    Dude, they are literally everywhere. You CAN'T or you WON'T?

    Quote:

    Originally Posted by booch
    I have a fairly busy life...

    Don't we all?

    Quote:

    Originally Posted by booch
    ...I'm too shy to ask out any girls I do meet.

    Get over it. (Seriously, it's a frame of mind, but if you have serious social anxiety, professional counseling may be necessary.) Nothing ventured, nothing gained. Not asking guarantees a 100% failure rate.

    By the way, you... ARE A MAN! The letters N and O combined should not hurt you.
    *DINK* - See... they bounce off. How many NOs can you endure to get a YES?

    Quote:

    Originally Posted by booch
    All I want is to go out with someone and have a good time.

    I've heard that almost ALL girls like to have a good time. Go figure.

    Quote:

    Originally Posted by booch
    I'm okay with it not leading to anything.

    Great! Then you can't be disappointed. No expectations is the way to go.

    Quote:

    Originally Posted by booch
    If you have any suggestions on how to approach girls...

    How about starting with "Hi", followed by a practiced conversation starter about anything, suitable for any situation. You may need to spend some time thinking on this one. Start by practicing just saying "Hi" to any girl that you make eye contact with until you are comfortable with that.

    Quote:

    Originally Posted by booch
    ...or where to meet them I would greatly appreciate it.

    You said you were "too shy to ask out any girls I do meet". Start with those. Then, all the ones that smile at you and make eye contact. Then all the ones that look at you, look away, and then look back at you sheepishly. Do you ever visit a bar, church, library, grocery store, restaurant, gym, post office, office building, mall, dry cleaner, doctor, dentist, gas station, or home improvement center? Odds are, there might be girls there.
  • Mar 10, 2007, 04:07 AM
    JoeCanada76
    You say you want to get out and have fun and meet somebody new. At the same time you say you still miss your ex and that you still love her. That is your problem right there. It is not because your shy, it is not because of any other reason except for holding onto something that is not there anymore. The sooner you realize that the better chanches of you actually going out and having fun, actually letting go of the past. Then it will hit you like never before. As soon as you start to have fun... That is when you will meet someone.

    Joe
  • Feb 20, 2009, 03:58 AM
    Samuel-baxter
    I Am in what was your exact situation and I see what there all getting at when it comes to girls Im a is I think it fear to say I should harden up I've herd You don't want to be top nice! So if we harden up well be beating them of with a stik if you know what I mean ;P

    Any luck since your posted this.

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