I'm Rick and we have been together for ten years. I'm 34 and he is 28 and we have problems like any other couple. I want to have sex more often but he doesn't even think try to have sex. I have caught him looking at other guys online like porn sites. He is diabetic type 1 since 15 and not to long ago I took him to the doctor. His tests came back normal but the doctor told to watch his diet and avoid carbohydrates. He works part time and I work full time but we have time for each other. We go out and spend quality time together. But inorder to have sex I have to ask him. We masturbate more because I think it's his way of having sex. Although masturbation is sex I want to have penetration more often but it seems he isn't horny

Did you have a question or were you just throwing this out there for people to read?

Or he could not like the penetration... Have you talked to him about this?

Has it always been like this ? Or has it changed over time?

Yea, maybe he is not that into penetration (or has to be really really in the mood for that)? What about blowjobs?

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Originally Posted by odinn7

Did you have a question or were you just throwing this out there for people to read?

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I vote it's for the shock value - and, of course, we're a tough crowd to sell anything to.

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I'm Rick and we have been together for ten years. I'm 34 and he is 28 and we have problems like any other couple. I want to have sex more often but he doesn't even think try to have sex. I have caught him looking at other guys online like porn sites. He is diabetic type 1 since 15 and not to long ago I took him to the doctor. His tests came back normal but the doctor told to watch his diet and avoid carbohydrates. He works part time and I work full time but we have time for each other. We go out and spend quality time together. But inorder to have sex I have to ask him. We masturbate more because I think it's his way of having sex. Although masturbation is sex I want to have penetration more often but it seems he isn't horny

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I am wondering if he has backed off from having penetration because he is uncomfortable with the act but doesn't know how to talk to you about it.

As with any couple communication is extremely important. Instead of doing something because you think it is what he wants or thinks, ask him. Talk with him about what is going on. Find out from him what his needs are. Explain yours and together find a compromise.

I note that you have been together since he was 18. Were you his first real or long term relationship? How well has your relationship adjusted to the changes that an 18 year old goes through as he/she matures? Is he working part time by choice or is he wanting more in the way of a career and feeling stressed? Are you still a couple or are you friends with benefits?

It's good that you spend time doing other things, but if you are doing those things to get more sex, then it defeats the purpose of being together. One reason many people back off from having sex is the feeling of being pressured into it or like sex is all their partner wants. Even if you don't mean to put pressure on him, he may be feeling like it.