I have a child that was apprehended due to domestic abuse issues and it will be a year since apprehension in two months. I've completed most of my required programs except for my Pca with a physicatrist which won't be done until weeks later. N Iam about to give birth(same father, not together any longer) and I was told if I got into some sort of stable housing that I can keep the new baby until my Pca was completed then get back my other child. Now they are saying otherwise that I have a birth alert on me n they are going to apprehend the baby from birth until they get the Pca report back which won't be until months later. Is there any way to fight this birth alert and to speed up the Pca? ( parent capacity assessment) I really miss my other child and would like to form the bond with the new baby. Iam capable of caring for my children and gave up the toxic abusive relationship any advice?

What country are you in?
The only way I know of to fight/speed up anything to do with social services is to hire a lawyer. You might call around looking for free (pro bono) ones at law schools or large firms who do a certain amount each year.
A key phrase I hear is 'stable housing,' and if the baby is due and you don't have that yet, there's one obstacle. Another might be proving that the abusive father is really gone. And so on.. we aren't there to know all the reasons they are doing what they do. A good relationship with the social worker (as best you can!) helps.

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Originally Posted by joypulv

What country are you in?
The only way I know of to fight/speed up anything to do with social services is to hire a lawyer. You might call around looking for free (pro bono) ones at law schools or large firms who do a certain amount each year.
A key phrase I hear is 'stable housing,' and if the baby is due and you don't have that yet, there's one obstacle. Another might be proving that the abusive father is really gone. And so on.. we aren't there to know all the reasons why they are doing what they do. A good relationship with the social worker (as best you can!) helps.

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Iam in Canada n I tried a lawyer n they said they can't help me until after I don't know

Even with a lawyer, you have to do a lot of the work providing answers to at the very least the 2 issues I mentioned.
If I were you, I would concentrate on the newborn for now (not in any way ignoring your other child). Is there any kind of halfway house for mothers in your situation, to be with their infants temporarily, while under supervision in a group setting? Are you able to get along with your social worker?

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Originally Posted by joypulv

Even with a lawyer, you have to do a lot of the work providing answers to at the very least the 2 issues I mentioned.
If I were you, I would concentrate on the newborn for now (not in any way ignoring your other child). Is there any kind of halfway house for mothers in your situation, to be with their infants temporarily, while under supervision in a group setting? Are you able to get along with your social worker?

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They (Cfs) keep changing my social workers n yes I am in the process of entering a woman's transition housing where I could be monitored with baby but this new worker is saying at this point it doesn't matter. I called everywhere n just don't know what to do. This is heartbreaking.

Wait.. how can you be entering a transition house and yet still lose the baby? What exactly are the facts here? Do you mean you will have the baby with you but only briefly, or what? And WHY? There have to be reasons... such as reports from the programs you are in? I just don't get the sense that you are telling the whole story. We don't know you, you are anonymous, we aren't here to judge, but you have to be straight with the whole story.

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Originally Posted by joypulv

Wait.. how can you be entering a transition house and yet still lose the baby? What exactly are the facts here? Do you mean you will have the baby with you but only briefly, or what? And WHY? There have to be reasons... such as reports from the programs you are in? I just don't get the sense that you are telling the whole story. We don't know you, you are anonymous, we aren't here to judge, but you have to be straight with the whole story.

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I was in jail I breached a no contact order that my ex and I has against each other. I made sure that I continued my visits with my other child. I pleaded out to an assault though it was self defense but I would have been sitting there longer waiting for trial so I took the deal. And my Social worker at the time made me believe that if I got into transition housing for abused women that I could keep baby and work towards getting back my other child.that they will work with me to reintegrate him into my life. Iam not addicted to anything Nor have I ever had a problem with it. Iam no way a criminal I don't even jay walk. If it wasn't for this man I wouldn't even have a record. They are trying to say with my criminal history they are concerned. My ex got a nco against me and when I didn't listen to him he would breech me. This relationship was very toxic and I haven't spoken to him since the beginning of June . I'm a young woman and I believe I'm a good mother my kid was always provided for. I just kept falling for this mans lies and the cycle of violence. I gave Cfs a 18 page letter depicting our relationship and how I was treated. So they wouldn't give him our child. I completed the parenting program, Afm, anger management , a program in jail regarding healthy relationships and domestic abuse, I am in the near future taking counseling, among other programs that I have signed up for. And I applied for transition housing which my support worker is helping to speed up. Despite all this the new Cfs worker is saying I can't have the new baby until my Pca is completed. Iam capable of caring for my child but it seems no matter what I say that she isn't listening. Iam trying to prove to her that yes I did give up my abusive relationship, I'm taking all these programs to show that I am changing for the better of me and my kids. Why have all these programs that are trying to help families when Ur going to rip them apart anyway? I think the best interest o the child is to be with its mother. I want to breast feed my baby and to form that mother child bond. This isn't fair I know of so many mothers that should have their kids apprehended but don't or Cfs grants them back their kids when they clearly are still struggling with substance and abuse issues. I just don't know. My child is due on 8 weeks and I already had one child ripped away from me and can't bear the thought of it happening again. I'm not a bad mom and the agency even repeatedly told me that I have great parenting skills and they love how I interact with my child.

I'm sorry you got a new worker who is giving you different answers than the last one.
I can't tell what happened when though - when you breached the no contact, when you got charged with assault. If you couldn't stay away from the man even after all the orders to and your promises that you wouldn't, they aren't going to trust you anymore, or at least not for a long time. Her decisions aren't made on her own, and it takes a while sometimes for reviews by committees to come down.
Yes, I know there are mothers out there who are much much worse, and they don't have their children taken away! Life is unfair most of the time. But you have to keep that to yourself (or here) or they will think you are making excuses. So try to ignore that and just keep trying. It might be really tough if the father tries again to see you when the baby is born.