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-   -   My girlfriend thinks I'm insanely jealous and emotionally abusive. (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=694953)

  • Aug 18, 2012, 01:45 PM
    Concernedly
    My girlfriend thinks I'm insanely jealous and emotionally abusive.
    I've been going out with a girl for 7 months now, and since the beginning, she's hid little things from me, which made me a little insecure. She would conveniently forget things and I would be afraid to ask her further because it usually turns into her getting mad that I'm being suspicious, so I ultimately avoid questioning anything that I see as inconsistent. She would go out with some male friends, some she's dated before, and I didn't know about it until after, sometimes because she accidentally revealed it to me. Still, it didn't make me not trust her with her friends, only brought a lot of concern why this was happening and where it was coming from. When I ask her, she says it's because I get "insanely jealous" which she cites as me getting in a grumpy mood where I'm not very responsive. I admit I have this problem, but I continually tell her I literally want her to see her friends and have a life outside of our relationship and that I'm perfectly fine with it and I'm not worried about anything. And she still describes me as insanely jealous. Am I missing something? I love her and trust her, but I think it's getting in the way of a healthy relationship, simply because she thinks I'm emotionally abusive, when all it is is me being concerned and contemplative, and desperately trying to tell her how I feel, and, in case it isn't clear, I do it in a calm, non-angry manner. It seems like I can't approach her with any concerns I have at all. What do you think I can do?

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