Live in nj Co parenting; our son is 8. We have lived together for sharing all expenses for 9 years. In the current residence for last three with no lease. While both contribute to household expenses, she makes more moneyy 66%. However, I take care of our sons needs primarily. She is abusive, verbally and physically towards me in front of our son. Her daughter now 20, she attacked, physically and verbally when daughter was 16 and the dyfs took child away and gave custody to fatherat that time. My ex used a restraining order to get me out of the apt under false allegations for three weeks; judge dismissed. I haven't seen my son and can't return to my apt because she obtained a lease while I was on tro. I filed for emergent custody and got court date for Oct which is another 2 months without my son I've never been more than two days away from him and have spoken to him daily all his life. How can I getmy son sooner? Plus I'm still staying with my sister since I can't return to the apt; police tell me she has lease I have to go even though it's been my residence for three yrs.

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Originally Posted by Concerned869

Live in nj Co parenting; our son is 8. We have lived together for sharing all expenses for 9 years. In the current residence for last three with no lease. While both contribute to household expenses, she makes more moneyy 66%. However, i take care of our sons needs primarily. She is abusive, verbally and physically towards me in front of our son. Her daughter now 20, she attacked, physically and verbally when daughter was 16 and the dyfs took child away and gave custody to fatherat that time. My ex used a restraining order to get me out of the apt under false allegations for three weeks; judge dismissed. I haven't seen my son and can't return to my apt because she obtained a lease while i was on tro. I filed for emergent custody and got court date for Oct which is another 2 months without my son I've never been more than two days away from him and have spoken to him daily all his life. How can i getmy son sooner? Plus I'm still staying with my sister since i can't return to the apt; police tell me she has lease i have to go even though it's been my residence for three yrs.

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There is nothing you can do - you've applied to the Court for relief. You have to wait for your hearing date.

Yes, it appears she controls the apartment. At any rate, she needs a place to live with the child.

Did you apply for emergency relief OR for a hearing in the normal course of business?

EDIT: Please stop opening new threads - https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/real-e...se-694279.html

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Originally Posted by JudyKayTee

There is nothing you can do - you've applied to the Court for relief. You have to wait for your hearing date.

Yes, it appears she controls the apartment. At any rate, she needs a place to live with the child.

Did you apply for emergency relief OR for a hearing in the normal course of business?

EDIT: Please stop opening new threads - https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/real-e...se-694279.html

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Custody was family law so I was advised to post here. No worries. I did file emergent hearing and was given the Oct date. I find this a bit too long to be without my son. What she's doing is not in his best interest.

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Originally Posted by Concerned869

Custody was family law so i was advised to post here. No worries. I did file emergent hearing and was given the Oct date. I find this a bit too long to be without my son. What she's doing is not in his best interest.

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Just out of curiosity, who told you to open two threads on basically the same subject? This Family Law thread does ask about the lease.

At any rate - you are at the mercy of the Court at this time. You filed an emergency petition and apparently the Court is very busy. Best interest or not, you will have to wait.

Your "ex" is probably going to use the protective order against you, allege you are a danger to the child. Has your Attorney reviewed that with you?

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Originally Posted by JudyKayTee

Just out of curiosity, who told you to open two threads on basically the same subject? This Family Law thread does ask about the lease.

At any rate - you are at the mercy of the Court at this time. You filed an emergency petition and apparently the Court is very busy. Best interest or not, you will have to wait.

Your "ex" is probably going to use the protective order against you, allege you are a danger to the child. Has your Attorney reviewed that with you?

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Thank you for the quick response s. The two threads were not intentional. Perhaps I misunderstood the advise. In any event the tro was falsely put in place and will not look good on her. Lawyer is going to request a hearing sooner our at the very least try for an order to allow me access to my son since she's no basis for keeping him from me. I've never hit or attacked her and while I have a few choice words for her I've never done that either. I just want to take care of my son and I've provided her with a shared parenting plan schedule which she's ignored.I've been battling since April. Lawyer will handle,I just wanted to see if there was anything or any steps I should take in addition. Thanks again

See if your lawyer can get any emergancy order signed by the judge.

What is the current custody agreement ? What type of current order is in place giving you what rights ?

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Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck

See if your lawyer can get any emergancy order signed by the judge.

What is the current custody agreement ? What type of current order is in place giving you what rights ?

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Currently we both have joint legal and physical but she won't let me back to apt or see my son.

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Originally Posted by Concerned869

Currently we both have joint legal and physical but she won't let me back to apt or see my son.

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And that is because of the restraining order. She apparently won't allow the OP to meet the son outside the apartment.

I suspect her behavior is based on the reasons she got the restraining order.

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Originally Posted by JudyKayTee

And that is because of the restraining order. She apparently won't allow the OP to meet the son outside the apartment.

I suspect her behavior is based on the reasons she got the restraining order.

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The restraining order was based on false allegations and was dismissed as such. She is doing all of this to keep Mr from him. I will consult with lawyer. Thanks

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Originally Posted by Concerned869

The restraining order was based on false allegations and was dismissed as such. She is doing all of this to keep Mr from him. I will consult with lawyer. Thanks

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There is no restraining order? That changes things.

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Originally Posted by JudyKayTee

Just out of curiosity, who told you to open two threads on basically the same subject? This Family Law thread does ask about the lease.

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I did! I didn't want to muddy the custody issues with the real estate issues.

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Originally Posted by JudyKayTee

There is no restraining order? That changes things.

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This is one of the reasons, I wanted them separate. The RO was dismissed so no longer is in play. I think the OP muddies things by bringing the RE issues in here.

The issue in this thread is what does the OP do about about seeing his child. My advise is to go to court for primary custody. But such a petition is complicated by the fact the OP doesn't have a place to live yet. He needs to establish a residence. So right now he needs to file for a temp visitation order.

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Originally Posted by ScottGem

I did! I didn't want to muddy the custody issues with the real estate issues.

This is one of the reasons, I wanted them separate. The RO was dismissed so no longer is in play.

The issue in this thread is what does the OP do about about seeing his child. My advise is to go to court for primary custody.

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Okay - got it. My question (and I know this isn't scheduled until October) is whether the "ex" moved and signed a new lease, entered a new lease in just her name, something else - ?

Wonder if it isn't a "legal lock" out? Of course, if the "ex" is looking to sink him any contact is a bad idea.

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Originally Posted by ScottGem

I did! I didn't want to muddy the custody issues with the real estate issues.




This is one of the reasons, I wanted them separate. The RO was dismissed so no longer is in play. I think the OP muddies things by bringing the RE issues in here.

The issue in this thread is what does the OP do about about seeing his child. My advise is to go to court for primary custody. But such a petition is complicated by the fact the OP doesn't have a place to live yet. He needs to establish a residence. So right now he needs to file for a temp visitation order.

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Done. Court date is Oct 10th, but that's two months away. It looks like I have to wait it out and just keep trying to ask my ex to see my child in the meantime; every time she says no shows poor parenting on her part. Thanks all for your help.

Keep a journal. Document each time you ask to see your son and she refuses. Record all phone conversations (but tell her you are doing so.). Did you ask your attorney about an emergency visitation order?

Aside to Judy. As I understand it, the mother filed for a TRO. While he was out of the house she got the landlord to give her a lease in her name only. Then showed that to the police to keep him from coming back to the apartment.

I suspect, if all this can be proven, it will not look good for the mother in court.

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Originally Posted by ScottGem

Keep a journal. Document each time you ask to see your son and she refuses. Record all phone conversations (but tell her you are doing so.). Did you ask your attorney about an emergency visitation order?

Aside to Judy. As I understand it, the mother filed for a TRO. While he was out of the house she got the landlord to give her a lease in her name only. Then showed that to the police to keep him from coming back to the apartment.

I suspect, if all this can be proven, it will not look good for the mother in court.

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Yes, lawyer working on emergent hearing. Scott, you are correct and yes it can be proven that she used tro to get need out and now keep me away from my residence. I've been forced to obtain a new residence. Again, looks like I need the lawyer. I was hoping to save myself a few dollars but things are to complicated. Thanks for the advice

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Originally Posted by Concerned869

Yes, lawyer working on emergent hearing. Scott, you are correct and yes it can be proven that she used tro to get need out and now keep me away from my residence. I've been forced to obtain a new residence. Again, looks like i need the lawyer. I was hoping to save myself a few dollars but things are to complicated. Thanks for the advice

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I always think you can pay an Attorney in the short run or spend the rest of your life wishing you had.

You may be able to get your court costs reimbursed if she is found to be in the wrong. Make sure your attorney asks the judge about that.