I am 19 and my fiancé is 22. When we first got together I was overjoyed that I had found a man that could keep up with me in the sack. (especially since a previous partner told me that my sex drive was too high) It has been a few months now and we only have sex like 1-2 times a week when before it was 6-9 times a week.

He is in the military and he is often stressed but he is still affectionate and says he's in the mood but as soon as I make the move he says that for some reason his mood went away, he says its not me, and I don't believe that it is because I am not an unattractive girl and I'm a lot of fun in the bedroom.

I don't know what is going on but if anyone has some advice I'm really open to anything.

Thanks for your time in advance!

How long have you been going together? Do you see each other to have fun for long walks, visiting places of interest, eating out, movies, even just spending quiet time together?

You said you make the firs move. Men like to make the first move, that is probably part of your problem. Making the first move makes meen feel more manly, take that away from them and they will be unsatisfied.

Maybe you're pushing him too much? You say he's stressed yet you still expect it as often as before. Also, without more detail, I have to wonder if this has anything to do with it:

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Originally Posted by libidogirl

and i dont believe that it is because i am not an unattractive girl and im a lot of fun in the bedroom.

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Originally Posted by asompur

You said you make the firs move. Men like to make the first move, that is probably part of your problem. Making the first move makes meen feel more manly, take that away from them and they will be unsatisfied.

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That is totally untrue and is just a stereo typical answer. Plenty of men have no problem with a woman making the first move.

I was also told that I have too high of a sex drive before. When people are stressed it kills their libido.

I totally understand your frustration though. I used to become irate when I'd make the move only to get turned down.

Typically as the relationship progresses couples tend to have less sex. I would be supportive, appreciative and try your best to show him that you understand where he is coming from. You may find that if he knows and feels you understand him he will come around more often.

I definitely don't mind who makes the first move, as long as someone does... :).

Maybe he just has low sex drive, have you talked to him about it? If he is, and you are the opposite, then you two are not a match sexually. Do you actually try to turn him on?

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Originally Posted by asompur

You said you make the firs move. Men like to make the first move, that is probably part of your problem. Making the first move makes meen feel more manly, take that away from them and they will be unsatisfied.

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In what Country? So - if the man doesn't make "a move" but the woman does the sex will be unsatisfactory to the man?

In fact, you've been asked the same question before - what Country?

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Originally Posted by asompur

You said you make the firs move. Men like to make the first move, that is probably part of your problem. Making the first move makes meen feel more manly, take that away from them and they will be unsatisfied.

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I see nothing but biased opinion in this. I love it when my woman makes the first move, prefer it actually.

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To answer the question.

Do you know what you're doing to this guy? You're making sex a chore. Just another thing to get done today and you know what that does? It makes sex completely, tasteless and boring. Too much of a good thing ain't always good sweetheart.

Maybe go get yourself a toy, pleasure yourself instead of yearning it from him. Enjoy the time you spend with yourself, and cherish the time he spends with you. In the bedroom of course.

Maybe he is stressed and having sex with you everyday is something he cannot do right now. Have you actually talked to him about it? Your being attractive has nothing to do with it.
Or maybe he is no longer in to you as much as before.

Because there is much more involved in a man's sex drive than just a an enthusiastic sex partner.

Men are macho, and they want to feel they are in control. While a woman who initiates sex is a real turn-on for a while, it can get old. It kind of takes the fun out of the chase.

Sometimes a quiet seductive woman who is great at other interests he shares turns him into a lion. Take it from one who knows. I have the greatest sex life you could ever imagine, every day, fabulous, and I am 59 years old. I do take care of myself, look pretty darn good, and I just wait for the attack. It's wonderful. I love being seduced, and he is in to being that conquering guy. We do everything together. I still get flowers for no reason once in a while. Stay looking good, and be a little more coy. Also have a full happy life with friends and activities. Nothing is more attractive than a really happy confident woman who stands back and waits a little. Good luck.

Less sex, more talk... a lot more. Nobody is THAT attractive and fun in bed. At least find out the cause of his stress. I mean is that all you are good at? How about other fun, and intimacy?

I get YOU love sex, but there is more to a healthy relationship. Especially after the lust has faded.