My fiancée has 3 children who will be 6 and 7 this year they hate living with there mother and the oldest has made such comments as I live in a dump, one of the twins has actually called and ask when can I come home? Would the court consider letting them choose at that age which parent they would like to live with?
We haven't actually seen there home but from what the grandparents are saying its really rough looking apartment in a bad area in Maryland!
Could the statements the kids are making about there home with there mother be used in court to prove that she has them living in unfit conditions?

I believe you may have a chance at getting them. The statements could be used if they talked to the judge and said it. The judge would have them meet with him alone to discuss the problem. I would try to get them, if they are saying this take it for what its worth. The kids must have it bad over at that house. Normally kids are to scared to share things like that at that age. I would definitely try to get them.

Most judges will speak to children even younger than this. I would definitely have them speak to the children and the grandparents. If the children are living in filth, to me it shows what type of parent the person is. And it must be horrible because most children don't mind mess. But make sure this is actually the case so you don't end up looking like a fool.

Thanks for the advice, I will make sure and tell the lawyer about these statements that they have made and see if the he can get the judge to talk with the kids I guess my only worry there is they may feel intmidated by the judge, but we will just have to see what happens

The judge is usually really friendly and will do whatever is possible to make the kids feel comfortable. Don't worry and just explain to the kids what's going on, why the judge wants to talk to them, and what they need to do.

There is a case currently being prosecuted on Long Island where 3 children were found to be living in true squalor. Jars of urine, feces, piles of used toilet paper and more were found in the house.

So I kind of doubt if your future step kids are in that bad a situation.

That being said, Family courts do tend to look at the welfare of the kids first. But if their mother is doing her best to provide a decent home, then the court may not change things. They may, however, require his support payments to increase.

I agree with ScottGem. If the mother is having trouble making ends meet and she is forced to live in an undesirable neighborhood because her income doesn't allow her to live in a nice area, that is not a basis for changing custody. What I find curious is why did one of the kids say, "I want to come home." Is your fiancé living in the house they lived in with their mother? If that is the case, it is pretty normal for kids to say something like that. Unless you have solid proof that they are living in filth and squalor, a judge will most likely dismiss it, and as ScottGem points out, suggest that her child support payments be increased. Your fiancé should consult a lawyer. He/she will be to advise him further.

First of all let me start by saying that the mother should not be having trouble making ends meet she's make at least 10.00 an hour her boyfriend makes 25.00 hr she gets a 1200.00 ssi check plus child support which is 900.00. Both her and her boyfriend work full time! She's paying 1400.00 a month for an apartment in a bad part of MD because its easy access to her drug habit, and yes we can prove she has one and so does her boyfriend he's public record is full of drug charges.
Yes I agree there mayb children living in worse conditions but they possible could be living in filth and for there mother to have the kind of money comeing into her that she has comeing to her every month there's no reason for the kids to be saying these kind of statements!
As far as the question about the one child asking when can I come home, NO the father does not live in the house that he lived in with there mother he lives in a totally different state totally different house! So that being said I ask why would he ask on the phone when can I come home??

Okay, ncgirl, thanks for the additional info.

It is hard for us to know exactly why he is saying that. It could be that he feels more comfortable with you and your fiancé. It could be that he is desperately unhappy living with his mother. It could be that his mother is ignoring him or treating him unkindly. It could be that he hates the boyfriend and loves you and wants to live with you and your fiancé.

If you want to try to gain custody of these kids, you need to figure out a way to get proof that they are living in unsafe conditions. So, if you can find any people that will testify against the boyfriend or mom, that would help. If you can get someone to visit the apartment who can find a way to take pics inside, that would help. Or, get someone who the court would be viewed as totally objective in this, to visit and see the living conditions. They could testify against her. You might consider calling Child Protective Services and seeing if they will do a home check because the kids seem so unhappy.

The judge will listen to the kids, but without an "outsider" to testify that yes, they are living in squalid conditions it is your bf's word against their mother's. The wishes of a younger child does not weigh as heavily as that of an older one (teenager). CPS assumes that younger kids can be coached and more easily influenced than older ones.
So, you have to be prepared for that. The bottom line is, it is always up to whatever judge is assigned the case. They will listen to younger children. Some will be persuaded, some won't.

If you are worried about this situation and want to get custody of these children, your fiancé should find a good family lawyer that knows the ins and outs of these types of situations and can help guide you both on what you need to do to build a case against the mother and ultimately convince a judge that living with your fiancé would be in the children's best interests.

Have you reported the situation to the local childrens' services agency? As Ruby said, there is no way for us to know why the child is saying what he's saying. But it SHOULD be reported. The local services agency needs to investigate. If the mom is still doing drugs, then they will take the kids out of there.

So I have to wonder why the kids are still there.

Because we have contacted dss on several occasions also the children's daycare, school, anymous people, and there grandparents have called but they call ahead by about 24 hrs instead of showing up unannounced so it gives her time to make things look good and hide other things. Dss has also leaked info to her concerning who has called and made the report about her so I have a very low opinion of them. We are contacting lawyers and researching to see who would be the best one for us to get to represent us!

Hmm, I would bring this higher up the DSS ladder. If they are doing as you say, then the case worker is not acting in the best interest of the children.

Who would be higher than child protective services? Or do you mean request a different case worker

I mean the current case worker's supervisor, or maybe the head of the agency.