Ask Me Help Desk - Social Anxiety.

Hi,
I'm 23. Also a university student and I have a good job. For the past 2 years, I discovered something about myself that I wish I hadn't uncovered. One day, I pretty much fell into a deep hole of loniless. I did not want to speak with anyone I knew and I wasn't living with my family. The reason I did it was because I thought I was meant to be alone. I felt like I wasn't good enough or pretty enough to be around anyone. I used to feel this way since I was 9 or 10. But it wasn't full blown until I was out of my comfort zone. As the years progressed, I started cutting myself and I still do it. Two years ago, I started turning RED around the people I knew - this constant blushing made me VERY sad. I already did not feel pretty enough, this just made it worst! I don't use makeup for this because I cannot bring myself to talk to a cosmetican or to look through cosmetics - yes, I am nervous.

Now, I am seeing a therapist (for about 2 months) - I am doing my best to overcome my fears and my past by talking about them and being strong by crying and letting out my feelings. But now, I am just VERY UPSET - because I have started to lose my hair! FCUK! I mean, what kind of TORTURE is this! Maybe, I'm meant to be punished. I was never a bad person and I am still not. I am nice to people who approach me and I try my best to help whoever needs it. I am really trying my best to work hard at school - but my thoughts are making my lose focus! I just NEED MOTIVATION. I need to finish or there won't be a purpose for me in this life, which I would be willing to leave behind.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Yenoh

Hi,
I'm 23. Also a university student and I have a good job. For the past 2 years, I discovered something about myself that I wish I hadn't uncovered. One day, I pretty much fell into a deep hole of loniless. I did not want to speak with anyone I knew and I wasn't living with my family. The reason I did it was because I thought I was meant to be alone. I felt like I wasn't good enough or pretty enough to be around anyone. I used to feel this way since I was 9 or 10. But it wasn't full blown until I was out of my comfort zone. As the years progressed, I started cutting myself and I still do it. Two years ago, I started turning RED around the people I knew - this constant blushing made me VERY sad. I already did not feel pretty enough, this just made it worst!! I don't use makeup for this because I cannot bring myself to talk to a cosmetican or to look through cosmetics - yes, I am nervous.

Now, I am seeing a therapist (for about 2 months) - I am doing my best to overcome my fears and my past by talking about them and being strong by crying and letting out my feelings. But now, I am just VERY UPSET - because I have started to lose my hair! FCUK!! I mean, what kind of TORTURE is this! Maybe, I'm meant to be punished. I was never a bad person and I am still not. I am nice to people who approach me and I try my best to help whoever needs it. I am really trying my best to work hard at school - but my thoughts are making my lose focus! I just NEED MOTIVATION. I need to finish or there won't be a purpose for me in this life, which I would be willing to leave behind.

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The American Institute of Stress and The Centers for Disease Control have both reported that up to 90% of all illnesses are due to stress. I was lead to The Institute of HeartMath in 1997 and discovered that all of my illnesses were due to stress and anxiety I had been experiencing in my life. Through learning and practicing HeartMath's tools and technologies, I am able to prevent, manage and reverse the effects of stress and anxiety, in-the-moment, achieve better health, more energy, improved mental and emotional clarity, and improved performance and relationships. HeartMath's tools and technologies are scientifically substantiated; they literally saved my life.

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I have social anxiety too. I feel very lonely when I'm at home. I hate thinking about people having their friends and life while me I'm alone every time. I cried. I have no idea what to do. Seriously.

Keep talking with your therapist. You could also try keeping a journal of your thoughts. You should know that you are not meant to be alone... Instead, as a human being, you are meant to be relational... For most people, the most important thing in life is relationships. Start cultivating some friendships among classmates, or co-workers. You have a purpose in life, and there is a plan for how it will all turn out.
Self esteem is a matter of disciplining your mind. It may sound weird, but try speaking the truth out loud to yourself. Whenever a thought comes up that says " you are worthless" or "you are not pretty," counter it with truth- "I am not worthless, this is a lie. I will leave an impression on the world, and on the people that are around me. I am valuble, and I'm valued." Recognize these thoughts as lies, and counter them with truth.

Which of you two, by sitting at home, alone and crying, will add one minute to your life? If you want friends, you need to go out and find some... If there aren't any friends in your house- go to where you can find some. If you aren't where other people are- go to where the people are. Relationships take time and work- and you have to put forth some effort to find them. People are interesting- each one has their own life story. Go out and learn about people. Fretting and stewing, is only harming, not helping.

Hi, funkyy!

Perhaps you might want to think about starting your own thread about the way that you're feeling? This thread is now old and archived and not generally visible unless people happen to go to the forum topic area where it is.

If you start a new thread, you'll get the best variety of answers.

Thanks!

I have social anxiety too I also get so worried about if other people will ike me . But maybe try a group thearpy