Ok here is my story, At the ending of Feb. My husband and I decided to have a little bit of fun, fun as in a 3 some with another man.. for the most part I'm pretty sure I have narrowed it down to the 23rd of Feb. if I'm not mistaken. Here is the kicker me and the other guy never really had sex it was a lot of rubbing up and down on myself and then at the very end he put it in twice... I know this might be Too much info but I feel I need to say what happened. Just to be on the safe side the very next morning I went and bought a plan B pill because the guy is of a different race so I def don't not need to have a baby by another man. The guy says he never got off but I know it is possible to get pregnant from pre- so I wanted to be sure... Im almost positive I had a period in the middle of March for the simple fact I felt relieved but turned out the ending of April I found out I am pregnant... Im so nervous yet scared to think it could possible be the other man's but kind of think it would be impossible but I have no one to talk to about this other than hubby and he thinks that the baby is his and not the other guy... So either way hubby is going no where but neither of our familys would be accepting... Right now as of July 17th... I am 17wks n 1 day if you could please give me you best advice about this I'm pretty sure with the math I have done I would def be way farther along than I am... Im so stressed out about this and I know that's not good for the baby... PLEASE Help!!

Conception dates are normally plus or minus about two weeks, so once you get a date you think it happened, add and take away two weeks, it could be anyone within that time frame.

The morning after pill is of course not 100 percent.

The only way to be sure, is to do DNA tests when the baby is born, start with husband, and then work out with the possible people.

Just to be on the safe side get a dna test and if it doesn't come out mixed then it's your husbands

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Originally Posted by juojou

Just to be on the safe side get a dna test and if it doesnt come out mixed then it's your husbands

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What? Do you understand DNA? The DNA result is NOT proof of race - ?

Again - what?

I only got 3 answers the last time.. So I thought I might ask again... Please anyone with any thoughts please help.. Also I have put in on different site's the timing between the other man and my husband and I would be like 5wks ahead if it was his but I'm still nervous about this... So please help me...


Ok here is my story, At the ending of Feb. My husband and I decided to have a little bit of fun, fun as in a 3 some with another man.. for the most part I'm pretty sure I have narrowed it down to the 23rd of Feb. if I'm not mistaken. Here is the kicker me and the other guy never really had sex it was a lot of rubbing up and down on myself and then at the very end he put it in twice... I know this might be Too much info but I feel I need to say what happened. Just to be on the safe side the very next morning I went and bought a plan B pill because the guy is of a different race so I def don't not need to have a baby by another man. The guy says he never got off but I know it is possible to get pregnant from pre- so I wanted to be sure... Im almost positive I had a period in the middle of March for the simple fact I felt relieved but turned out the ending of April I found out I am pregnant... Im so nervous yet scared to think it could possible be the other man's but kind of think it would be impossible but I have no one to talk to about this other than hubby and he thinks that the baby is his and not the other guy... So either way hubby is going no where but neither of our familys would be accepting... Right now as of July 17th... I am 17wks n 1 day if you could please give me you best advice about this I'm pretty sure with the math I have done I would def be way farther along than I am... Im so stressed out about this and I know that's not good for the baby... PLEASE Help!!

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Originally Posted by momma2be8256

I only got 3 answers the last time.. So i thought i might ask again... Please anyone with any thoughts please help.. Also i have put in on different site's the timing between the other man and my husband and i would be like 5wks ahead if it was his but im still nervous about this... So please help me....


Ok here is my story, At the ending of Feb. My husband and I decided to have a little bit of fun, fun as in a 3 some with another man.. for the most part im pretty sure i have narrowed it down to the 23rd of Feb. if im not mistaken. Here is the kicker me and the other guy never really had sex it was alot of rubbing up and down on my self and then at the very end he put it in twice... I know this might be Too much info but i feel i need to say what happend. Just to be on the safe side the very next morning i went and bought a plan B pill because the guy is of a different race so i def dont not need to have a baby by another man. The guy says he never got off but i know it is possible to get pregnant from pre- so i wanted to be sure.... Im almost positive i had a period in the middle of March for the simple fact i felt relieved but turned out the ending of April I found out i am pregnant... Im so nervous yet scared to think it could possible be the other man's but kinda think it would be impossible but i have no one to talk to about this other than hubby and he thinks that the baby is his and not the other guy... So either way hubby is going no where but neither of our familys would be accepting... Right now as of July 17th... I am 17wks n 1 day if you could please give me you best advice about this im pretty sure with the math i have done i would def be way farther along than i am... Im soo stressed out about this and i know thats not good for the baby... PLEASE Help!!!

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I don't see a lot of difference between post #1 and post #2 - there is NO WAY to know the ID of the father until the child is born and DNA is done. Of course if the child is the "wrong color" that will be a dead giveaway.

I'm a little disgusted that this man was good enough to have sex with but the wrong race to father your child.

Anyway - my advice? Plan to give the child up for adoption if his/her race is "wrong;" don't have the child at all; have the child and be prepared for the criticism. You could always explain to the not accepting families exactly how this happened, I suppose.

Those are your only choices. "We" can guess, consult charts, quote figures - nothing is 100% until the child is born.

And, yes, he "put it in," he could be the father.

You engaged in risky behavior. I'm surprised you didn't ask the stranger to use protection - against disease if not pregnancy. At any rate - there is no 100% certain way to know.

Please don't start multiple threads with the same question. There is only ONE answer to your question and that's the answer Chuck gave you. Determining conception dates is an inexact science. The only way to know the father is with a paternity test after birth.

A DNA test is the only answer.

You can post this question a million times and the answer will always be the same. You'll have to wait for the birth of the baby, and do a DNA test. That's the only way to know who the father is.

Good luck.

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Originally Posted by JudyKayTee

I don't see a lot of difference between post #1 and post #2 - there is NO WAY to know the ID of the father until the child is born and DNA is done. Of course if the child is the "wrong color" that will be a dead giveaway.

I'm a little disgusted that this man was good enough to have sex with but the wrong race to father your child.

Anyway - my advice? Plan to give the child up for adoption if his/her race is "wrong;" don't have the child at all; have the child and be prepared for the criticism. You could always explain to the not accepting families exactly how this happened, I suppose.

Those are your only choices. "We" can guess, consult charts, quote figures - nothing is 100% until the child is born.

And, yes, he "put it in," he could be the father.

You engaged in risky behavior. I'm surprised you didn't ask the stranger to use protection - against disease if not pregnancy. At any rate - there is no 100% certain way to know.

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Well thanks for... Hummm Seem's that I guess just because this was nothing more than fun I should want to have another man's baby!! OK And there was pertection but he must have taken it off.. Thanks I love how this world is so backwards a man can screw a 1,000 woman but a woman has what you could call sex with one other man and she awful by not only having sex with him but by not wanting to have his baby like seriously... And I guess I was just hoping that some way you all would be able to back me up with the timing and things and help me feel that this would be OK... But that didn't happen!! And if the timing is different between the 2 then I guess there could be a chance that IT's NOT THE OTHER MAN'S... Esp. If I was Pregnant by the other guy I would be due like middle of NOV. Im not Due until DEC. 24!! Thanks for nothing!!

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Originally Posted by momma2be8256

just because this was nothing more than fun ...Thanks i love how this world is so backwards a man can screw a 1,000 woman but a woman has what you could call sex with one other man and she awful by not only having sex with him but by not wanting to have his baby like seriously....

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Excuse me, but sex is not recreation. It is something that should be shared with someone you are in a long term committed relationship. ANY TIME there is penile insertion there is the risk of pregnancy. So yes, if you allow a penis inside your vagina, then then you should be prepared to have the owner of that penis' child.

You willingly took the risk.

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Originally Posted by momma2be8256

Well thanks for...... Hummm Seem's that I guess just because this was nothing more than fun I should want to have another man's baby!!!! OK And there was pertection but he must have taken it off.. Thanks i love how this world is so backwards a man can screw a 1,000 woman but a woman has what you could call sex with one other man and she awful by not only having sex with him but by not wanting to have his baby like seriously.... And I guess i was just hoping that some way you all would be able to back me up with the timing and things and help me feel that this would be ok... But that didnt happen!!! And if the timing is different between the 2 then i guess there could be a chance that IT's NOT THE OTHER MAN'S.... Esp. If i was Pregnant by the other guy i would be due like middle of NOV. Im not Due untill DEC. 24!!! Thanks for nothing!!!

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No, I find it offensive that you are concerned not about having another man's child BUT the race of that child, like "seriously." I didn't read that anyone said you are awful, other than maybe that is how you think of yourself.

You didn't have "what you could call sex." You had what you would call sex or else you wouldn't be worried. If you want someone to make you "feel" better post on a chat board, not a medical board.

I don't know what you want anyone to say. There is no way to know who the father is without DNA. What about that don't you understand?

And you're welcome.

I am a labor and delivery nurse and there is no way on the face of the earth that we could tell you who the father of this child is via the internet.

You are almost positive that you had a period in March, but you aren't 100% certain. You see, some women have bleeding that resembles a period right in the very beginning of the pregnancy, usually before a woman knows she is even pregnant.

An amniocentesis can determine who the father is but there are virtually no doctors who will do an amnio strictly for the purpose of genetics as it carries such a high risk to both mother and baby. They will not place that risk strictly for genetics, only for actual real health issues.

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man can screw a 1,000 woman but a woman has what you could call sex with one other man and she awful by not only having sex with him but by not wanting to have his baby like seriously

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Yes, seriously. Any time the penis is inserted into a vagina, ejaculation or not, there is a risk of pregnancy occurring. Any person who engages in intercourse should be prepared for the consequences should they occur.

You engaged in risky behavior because you did not protect yourself, i.e. birth control pills, depo, or insist that he wear a condom prior to entering you.

Wouldn't the date's have to add up in some way to know that I was pregnant by the other man... Also I know that no one can give me for sure answers but even with the first guys post I should still be farther along than what I am... I have had several ultrasounds and all of them have been right on with Gestational Age meaning it should be my husbands not sure how it could possible be the other man's if the baby is not measuring at the size the baby would be if he could be the father... And again Im sure I had a menstrual in March and it was very regular like always... But I have done several timing charts and based on my last menstrual on March 19th this baby should be my husbands... Any ways its not like I cheated on my husband because he wanted to see this... So.. Also we have been in a committed Realationship for the past 8yrs so... And no I do NOT think I'm an awful person.. I done something that my husband wanted to watch so it was just supposed to be fun... Also here is this...





Pregnancy Dates

Due Date:

12/24/2012




Today's Date:

07/21/2012

17 Weeks 5 Days



Ovulation: OD

04/02/2012

2 Weeks 0 Days



Implantation:

04/11/2012

3 Weeks 2 Days



Expected Next Period:

04/16/2012

4 Weeks 0 Days



Fetal Heart Beat Seen:

05/03/2012

6 Weeks 3 Days



Nuchal Screen:

06/07/2012

11 Weeks 3 Days



2nd Trimester Begins:

06/21/2012

13 Weeks 3 Days



Quad Markers:

07/02/2012

15 Weeks 0 Days



Amniocentesis:

07/09/2012

16 Weeks 0 Days



Anatomic Ultrasound:

07/30/2012

19 Weeks 0 Days



Fetal Movements:

08/06/2012

20 Weeks 0 Days



Pregnancy Viable:

09/03/2012

24 Weeks 0 Days



Glucose Screen:

09/17/2012

26 Weeks 0 Days



3rd Trimester Begins:

09/23/2012

26 Weeks 6 Days



Daily Fetal Movements Count:

10/01/2012

28 Weeks 0 Days



Usual time to do fetal testing in HR patients:

10/29/2012

32 Weeks 0 Days



Term Pregnancy Begins:

12/03/2012

37 Weeks



Elective Delivery after this Date:

12/17/2012

39 Weeks 0 Days



Due Date:

12/24/2012

40 Weeks 0 Days


All of these add up just right!

The only info I need is the LMP and your due date, the rest of the dates are extraneous and have little, or nothing, to do with paternity.

The only info that was actually necessary was your LMP and your due date. Since you posted the actual encounter and everything surrounded by it, you opened yourself up to criticism. So, don't be so harsh to those who have responded.

If the first day of your LMP was March 19 and your due date is December 24, that puts you at a most likely conception date of April 2. Therefore, you can reasonably be assured that the baby is your husbands.

For future reference, it's best to just post the pertinent information if you don't want the criticism that goes along with the entire story.

For example... you could have posted like this...

"My LMP was March 19 and my due date is December 24. What day did I most likely conceive?" With that sentence you won't get the criticism that you got this time. Don't blame us for being harsh, you opened yourself up for that.

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Originally Posted by momma2be8256

Any ways its not like i cheated on my husband because he wanted to see this... So.. Also we have been in a committed Realationship for the past 8yrs so... And no i do NOT think im an awful person.. I done somthing that my husband wanted to watch so it was just supposed to be fun... Also here is this...

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No one has judged the three way sex that I'm reading. I have judged the "I don't want a child of mixed race" issue. You said you weren't an "awful person." I also don't read that anyone here said that you are.

Isn't the person to be talking to about this your OB?

I'm assuming this is your first child, because you are hung up on the time frame and tests and don't seem to be understanding what J9 is saying.

Trust me - J9 is the expert. You don't want to take her on in this forum!

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Originally Posted by JudyKayTee

No one has judged the three way sex that I'm reading. I have judged the "I don't want a child of mixed race" issue. You said you weren't an "awful person." I also don't read that anyone here said that you are.

Isn't the person to be talking to about this your OB?

I'm assuming this is your first child, because you are hung up on the time frame and tests and don't seem to be understanding what J9 is saying.

Trust me - J9 is the expert. You don't want to take her on in this forum!

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Have I told you lately that I love you? p_), Dang, can't figure out how to make the tongue sticky out face... Gonna have to give you the dreaded LOL instead!

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck

Conception dates are normally plus or minus about two weeks, so once you get a date you think it happened, add and take away two weeks, it could be anyone within that time frame.

The morning after pill is of course not 100 percent.

The only way to be sure, is to do DNA tests when the baby is born, start with husband, and then work out with the possible people.

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I feel fairly certain due to my calculations that the baby is your husband's. Reason being that you would be a couple of weeks farther along in pregnancy then you are now. If the baby was conceived in February- ( during the event) you would be at least 19 or 20 weeks pregnant by now. As you are only 17 weeks along, then it looks like you conceived later and that you did have that period in March. Hope this helps.

I agree with Judy. I don't see anyone judged you for anything other than your concern over race. An issue you brought up.

As we have said, calculating conception dates is an inexact science. Based on your facts, it is likely your husband is the father. But the only way to be sure is a paternity test.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Deniseanne

I feel fairly certain due to my calculations that the baby is your husband's. Reason being that you would be a couple of weeks farther along in pregnancy then you are now. If the baby was conceived in February- ( during the event) you would be at least 19 or 20 weeks pregnant by now. As you are only 17 weeks along, then it looks like you conceived later and that you did have that period in March. Hope this helps.

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I think J9 just said this - "reasonably" sure. Of course, there's still the issue of period or no period in March.

I truly don't understand having sex with anyone (race aside) without both the male AND the female using protection. If pregnancy isn't an issue, STDs sure are. If the OP and her husband have been monogamous for X number of years they have now brought in a new partner who brings along his own sex partners times their sex partners and the total can be amazing. That's the exposure to an STD.

And no one realized that the condom fell off, slipped off, something else? You say he took the "pertection" off - but nobody noticed?

And there was a lot of rubbing - which can be all it takes - and "in the end he [the third person] put it in twice" but they didn't really have sex.

What?

Pregnancy is just one of the things that can happen when sex is purely recreational with no thoughts about tomorrow.

Now - the legal standpoint. If the third party learns of the pregnancy somehow or other and thinks back and decides HE could be the father he can go to Court, request visitation, custody, a determination of paternity, and now OP and her baby are DNA tested by Court Order. All the way around this sounds like a nightmare.

I would assume OP is white and the third person is African American and that's the "concern." Has anyone mentioned that a lot of people can and do pass for white and then one day for whatever reason the truth comes out?

Anyway, off topic - I believe the only correct answer has been given. DNA testing.