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-   -   Lost my first love but I want him back (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=68292)

  • Mar 3, 2007, 09:51 AM
    snmc
    Lost my first love but I want him back
    By boyfriend just broke up with me last night, but I knew it was coming for a few days after I gave him some time to think about what he wanted to do. He says sometimes he wasn't happy in the relationship and it turned more into friends and that 'special spark' was gone, yet he still cares for me a lot and didn't want to hurt me. I still love him as he was my first love. Although it was only 8 months that we went out, I don't think I can ever forget about him. I told him I can give him space so he can clear his head, and we can give it another chance so we can allow ourselves to change and improve what we didn't like about each other, but he said even that probably wouldn't reignite the feelings. He genuininly really wants to be friends with me and I know he's a good guy who wouldn't hurt me, but I want to get back with him one day. But I also know that I can't contact him until a few weeks or months because I don't want him to seem that I'm always available for him. It's so tempting though. Since things didn't end that badly, do I have another chance with him down the road?

    Help me please!
  • Mar 3, 2007, 03:25 PM
    incognito
    There is always another chance for the relationship down the road.
    Just learn from it, mature, and take care of yourself and let yourself heal.
  • Mar 3, 2007, 11:50 PM
    I messed up
    I'm not sure of your age, but in high school a lot of people including myself, had broke up with their first real earth-moving relationship (mine was 11 months). I thought I made the right decision (like the other people) and me and her became friends. After a while we became more than friends, we had sex, pretty much like we were dating, but we weren't. That lasted for about 6 months. Then she blew up at me and thought that I was using her (and learned she wanted to date me the entire time), then she moved on and got another boyfriend. Then that left me crushed. I wanted to date her more then ever (after losing her).

    In short, if you want my opinion, if you act like you moved on and kind of ignore him. Maybe even pretend to be with another guy. Then he may go crazy over you and he will do anything to be back with you. Good luck with whatever you do :)
  • Mar 4, 2007, 04:12 PM
    snmc
    I messed up:
    I'm 22 and no longer in high school lol. Even though I'm older than most people during the time they have their first loves, he was mine.
  • Mar 4, 2007, 11:07 PM
    peter21
    I'm kind of going through the same thing with my first love and it seems to me that he might have other problems as well. Honestly, I think you two are in a much better state than in the situation I currently find myself in and I think you have nothing to worry about! You guys will be fine! However, give him his time. Let him be without you for a bit. Once it begins to drive him crazy he'll come around. Resist the urge! Should you feel like calling him, write down your feelings in a journal. That's what makes me feel better. Don't stay at home! Go out with your friends and have fun. Remember that you were a great outgoing person before you met him. Finally, always remember that you're a great girl with so many beautiful qualities and that he'd be a fool to let you go. It's just a moment this time will pass...

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