I have been with my partner for over 4 years. We are middle aged and keep our own houses. I am used to sharing everything I do, but he goes to places without telling me, e.g.. local fêtes near to him or other events that we sometimes go together to. He says he shouldn`t have to tell me every small detail, but why keep them secret? If I go out with old friends or to the cinema with a female friend, I always tell him, just as part of saying what I`ve done that day. He does not thinkit`s important to tell me, but always comments when I go out. Why does he not tell me?

I'm not sure what "partner" and "together" mean. You two live in separate homes and do many things with others and not include each other. Why should he tell you what he does in his spare time? The same goes for you -- why tell him every move you've made without him? Does he really care to hear?

You said he comments on what you do, stop telling him what your do. After 4 years, your relationship does not seem to be very serious, at least not to him which is why he feels like he does not have to tell you what he does apart from you.

I don't see what the problem is. Are you his keeper, or his girlfriend?

Why does he have to account where he's going or where he's been to you or anyone else? He's a grown man, lives alone, and has his own life.