I got ticketed at the beach today for open container. I had 3 beers and like 2 mix drinks that probably had like 2-3 shots in each. I am in drug court, so I imagine I have to call them asap and tell them I had police contact. Which in turn they will want me to come in for a urine test to determine if I've been drinking. It's the one test where they can test for the metaboloids of alcohol. So is there anything to speed this up to help me pass, and what's the most quick amount of time I can pee clean for the metaboloids of alcohol?

Based on your description (7-9 drinks) the minimum clearance time would be in the vicinity of 48 hours and perhaps as much as 72, timed from last drink.