I’ve been seeing a guy for 6 weeks. He was badly hurt in his past relationship. I was a shoulder to cry on and became close. We slept with each other and became very close but I stopped it as I couldn’t be just friends and he cared and didn’t want to do the rebound thing.

Last few weeks he stays over 3 times a week. It’s not just sex, we go out, and chat till early hours. He says he likes me, and wants to take things in stages, and slowly, and says he's not messing about with anyone else, but also says he doesn’t know if it will develop into relationship.

Is he scared? Haven’t seen him for a week as he has been on holidays and he says he’s missed me, and wants to see me tonight.

You're a rebound. Period. Whether he says you aren't or not, you are. Let this guy heal.

I would not even rate it as a rebound yet, more of a booty call. He is a man and found someone to have sex with within weeks of talking with them. So call it what you want, If there was no sex, no staying the night ( except for the couch) would he stay ?

Quote:

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Originally Posted by C0bra_M3nace

You're a rebound. Period. Whether he says you aren't or not, you are. Let this guy heal.

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Sorry didn't make it clear.. that was 10 months ago he split.. and this has happened the last 6 weeks

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck

I would not even rate it as a rebound yet, more of a booty call. He is a man and found someone to have sex with within weeks of talking with them. So call it what you want, If there was no sex, no staying the night ( except for the couch) would he stay ?

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He split 10 months ago.. he does stay without having sex... we have been out to lunch today.. sorry wasn't clear..

Should have made it clearer... ive known him 2 years... we started meeting up after his split... he stayed over slept in same ved.. used to meet up 3 times a week.. nothing happened for 4 months then we slept together... I couldn't be friebds and he wasn't ready so I blocked him out of my life till the past 2 months and the last 6 weeks we have been seeing each other and yes he does stay without having sex.. he blows hot and cold slmetkmes mates and other times more... I was wondering if you guys thought he was scared.. he was hurt really bad in past relationship... im scared of getting hurt.. I don't know whether to stop it or go with the flow... how long do you wait till someone is ready?

Doesn't matter, it can take people years and years to get over an ex if they don't do it right. Tread carefully with him.

Friends trying to move to the next level and build a relationship often have to go through these adjustment changes, as high hopes, high expectations make for a rushed effort.

He is going slow, not because he is scared, but cautious. I highly advise you to be also, since sex is already involved, and that only intensifies the feelings.

Slow way down, as 6 weeks of dating is VERY different than being a consoling friend, and even after 10 months, chances are he is still getting over the past, and cannot see clearly what lies ahead, or what he wants long term. He likes you, but not as much as you like him, or as much as you want him to like you.

Be careful with your heart. VERY careful.