He just left us and moved in with another woman, my son is 15 months at first he was there at every doctors appointment, he cooked, cleaned, walked with me. He was there and supportive after my six month he left one day and never came back. I found out he had moved in with another woman and her kids. Basically he ended up going to jail, getting out and coming back and helping. I do admit I shouldn't have took him back then again I have took him back two other times prior to that. But it was my first child and I wanted both parents there.

So now a few months after him being out he has found another woman and her kids and he took off on me again this time we were not together but he hasn't reached out to me regarding our son offered to help me sent any money or anything. Last time I seen him was April 7th on my son's birthday. He came from St. Louis for two weeks for my son't birthday and Easter and his fam bought are son lots of things for his birthday.

We have been on and off for over 7years. He has 2 other children here in the same city with me. The woman he currently stays with took him in when he didn't have a place to stay, and now he is seeing her and decided to just stay in St. Louis instead of coming back to Kansas City Mo were his 3 children reside. He doesn't work no car and I have reason to believe he may just be in St.Louis doing what he wants to do. I need to have an address for him in order for the state to be able to move the child support smoothly we have already legally established paternity. He just kind of acts as if he doesn't even have a care in the word about his own child considering I haven't heard from him in over a month.

He is on parole I have his parole officer's name address and phone number. Will the state be able to find him through his probation officer. Does anyone no any men so shallow just turn there back on their own child. And do you think he will change and want to be in his child's life or will he never reach out to us again?? If it helps he normally gets by off other people.

I'm just in a rage to where I want to get him back or like put him on blast on a website or something... I no this may sound mean and malicious but I am furious right now.

If married you file for divorce, if not married, you know why now. You file for child custody and child support and move on. This happens too many 100's of times a day and several times a day on here often.

That would be a very childish thing to do.
Does he pay child support? Make sure he is taking care of his financial business.

My son's father has cheated on me on and off for the whole 7 years we've known each other, eventually running off with another woman and leaving me to be a single parent.

Will he do this to every woman he meets or do you think maybe he just wasn't happy with me.

If it helps I am more attractive than every woman he has ever cheated on me with. And I no I mad a mistake of constantly taking him back. I am aware that this was foolish.

Also could it be that he is just a user an opportunist because he has always lived with the a woman he has never had his own place, car or job. Just need some opinions and friendly advice.

You know he has done this before, is a user? Unless he gets some counseling because he gets tired of himself (or someone pushes him to get help), he will probably always behave this way. Your looks have nothing to do with it. It's all inside his head, maybe from something that had happened in his childhood.

Yeah I always thought that because his dad ran off on his mom and treated her poorly could he have got this from his dad all of his brothers are cheaters too. There is only one that doesn't act this way. But see he ran off on me and our child is really young he ran off for a woman that is older and has kids of her own, but he isn't helping me with our son. He has only seen him a few times.

He has learned irresponsibility from his dad (great role model!) and maybe saw all sorts of dysfunctional stuff going on between his mom and dad all the time he was a child. And that dad could have learned this from his dad. So the cycle continues.

Get your son involved with stable male role models so he doesn't continue this cycle himself some day.

Only difference between him and his brothers are his brothers take care of their kids he doesn't. But thanks for the insight on this matter I really appreciate it.

I am really in my feelings about my son's father running off on us, I don't care that me and him aren't together.

It's just the fact that he just left and hasn't even asked how his son is doing in almost two months. He is living with a new woman and her two kids.

Is the woman the reason he hasn't called texted or cared at all rather his son is in good health or not. I just don't see how he could just act as if he doesn't have a child over here.

Yet he is laid up with her and her kids. He also has two other kids here in the same state, but I honestly thinks he reaches out to those kids they are 6 and 9 the son we have together is only 15months.

It really ticks me off that he can go play daddy to some kids that don't even belong to him and not have a care in the world about the child that we share together.

If it helps he lives with this woman and has no car or job. This woman is older than both of us. And has older kids. But he has lived off women the whole time I have known him.

Even me, not proud of this at all but it's a lesson learned.

What's this woman doing so great that's making him say screw his own kid or is it that he just wants nothing to do with me at all and if that means not reaching out to see if his own child is okay then so be it..

Obviously his priorities are all out of whack. He may just be feeling guilty about what he did to you and your son and doesn't want to face it.. But I wouldn't rule out this woman's influence as a possible reason as well. One day he will grow up and realize what he's missed out on...
Your son and yourself are probably better off without him anyway if he is willing to neglect his responsibility as a father.

I am in pretty much the same boat as you, my daughter is almost four and her father has only seen her three times.. Not because of anything I have done, but because when he has other women in his life he can't be bothered. She doesn't even know who he is when she sees him... But I can tell you this, that she is the brightest and happiest little girl I know, so really, your son doesn't need him to be happy if your ex wants to be a deadbeat. Just love him and let him be your whole world and that's really all he will need. You both deserve better.

You can't force a parent to to be a proper parent. If he bails there is little you can do about it.

But one thing you can do is make sure he provides support for your child. So make sure you go to court and file for child support.

I wanted some advice on how to cope my child's father walked out on us and moved in with another woman and her kids.

I told my family if he ever tried to come back to be a father to his child I would not give him that right because he should never have turned his back to begin with. But my fam says that would be wrong.

I am doing what I need to do every day as a mother taking care of my child and doing every thing I can to raise him to be a good man but I still have that hatred and anger toward his father.

I just wanted some advice from someone who has been through the same thing.I no some people will say just move on but it's not that easy.

I have devoted 7 years of my life to this man and this is my first child.

It's hard to think about him playing daddy to kids that don't belong to him and just turning his back on his own child. I think about it every day and haven't heard from him in a while. Don't know what to do.

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Originally Posted by Mievans82

I told my family if he ever tried to come back to be a father to his child I would not give him that right because he should never have turned his back to begin with. But my fam says that would be wrong.

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Your family is right. That is wrong and very selfish. Your son has a right to have his father involved in his life no matter how much or how little time they spend together.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Mievans82

I told my family if he ever tried to come back to be a father to his child I would not give him that right because he should never have turned his back to begin with. But my fam says that would be wrong.

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You don't have that option. Sure you could deny him visitation, so then he goes to court and gets it. And the court looks at you denying him his parental rights and gives him more.

I understand your hurt and anger. But don't put your son in the middle of that.

Not sure what you mean by come back, I would not let him come back to my bed and play the silly "baby daddy" game too many play. I would not let him move back in and live there.

But you really have no choice about allowing him to come and pick up the kids and have visits. You could try but he can easily take you to court and get court ordered visits.
And before you ask, child support and visits are not connected, so he does not have to be paying support to get visits.

With that said, you take him to court and get child support.

What is the legal status of the marriage? Support Order?

I agree with everyone - it is wrong to deprive your child of a father. He will soon be old enough to make his own decision about how his father has chosen to live his life.

EDIT: You asked this same question several days ago - you didn't like the answers? You really can't ask only one sex to answer your question. It's an open board. w.askmehelpdesk.com/children/do-you-think-he-will-ever-want-see-his-kid-again-676662.html

I also see other threads, same subject - https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...ge-676642.html

>Multiple Threads on the same subject Merged<

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Originally Posted by Homegirl 50

That would be a very childish thing to do.
Does he pay child support? Make sure he is taking care of his financial business.

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No he doesn't have a job he is a 3 time felon and he is on parole and I am in the child support process. The state of Missouri has already established paternity through the court because my son's father did not comply with the courts wishes. At the time he said I no that is my son and that he was going to be there. My son looks just like his other two children. But at one point while I was still pregnant he denied and ran off for another woman and her children.

There is a lot more to this story but not going there that could take forever. Well he ran off again with a different woman who also has children and he has been out in St. louis with her, I haven't heard from him in over a month. He just got out of jail in December he served a 1 year sentence on a suspended 3 year sentence with parole.

The courts are in the process of setting up our court date to see how much he will owe for child support. He is already 15 months behind I no every thing his social, inmate number, date of birth, his parole offices name address and phone number. I also now no were the new woman is staying and have her name and address. If he doesn't show up for the court date will they send the police to the address.

I give them and have him put in jail. Because Iike I said he had a suspended 2 years and did one if he gets in trouble or any new cases can't he serve that two years and how does the child support work I mean I no were he is, he doesn't no that I no but I found out. Although it is 3 1/2 hours from were I stay.

I don't know if he is doing drugs again but that will be a violation of his parole and the girl does drugs also he does weed and pcp she does weed. What are some different things that can happen here. Mind you he doesn't have children with the woman he ran off with he uses women for place to stay and he has even robbed women when they went to work before he does have a track record.

The other two children he has are here in the same city as me but those children are like 9 and 7 so they can call his phone and talk to him but my son is a small child. I honestly think he doesn't want to face the fact that he has another child. Help what should I do?

So this guy is now with another women, she is no doubt taking care of him. The guy s ounds like a loser.
If he wants to see his son, let him but you should be glad he is out of your life.

So my son's dad has been living in another city because he was placed on probation there when he got out of jail! He got out of jail the end of December of 2011. He use to send money to me for our son and he would come and visit.

Until things went bad out there and he ended up needing a place to stay! He met an older woman out there. He is in hist 20's she is in her 30's. She took him in and first he was paying rent I knew about her but I thought she was just being nice and letting him stay there, and at the time me and him were back together.

But I found out through his brother that he was sleeping with her. Just to give you some info on him he has no job, car, and just got out of jail from serving a year for forgery charges. So yes he is a felon. Last time I seen him was in April on our sons birthday. And last time I talked to him was in June.

Well his daughters birthday is today and it is of course labor day. So he is in Kansas City. But he hasn't tried to message me on Facebook or anything. I sent him a message he didn't even respond and he gets on there all the time.

And I talked to his P.O. and found out all he had to do is catch up his fees and he could come back to Kansas City. He lied to me and his family and said his P.O. said he can't come back until December when he is off parole. Why is he avoiding his son. He seems to only come back for his kids bdays and holidays that's it. He has a 16 month old with me and a 10 year old daughter and 8 year old son with another woman.

Me and him have been on and off for 8 years and this woman is not the first woman he has ran off on me for. There has been so many different women. And I do regret putting up with his crap for so long. But all I want him to do is be a dad to his son! I am in the final stages of my child support order. They just need a address for him but I don't know were this woman stays. I am to the point where I wouldn't let him see him even if he wanted to.

Because he hasn't been there for anything but his first birthday. He missed his first steps his first word and all that just to lay up with some woman and her kids! I don't get it. Why is he even avoiding me I clearly don't want him anymore I just want him to be a dad!

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Originally Posted by Mievans82

So my son's dad has been living in another city because he was placed on probation there when he got out of jail! He got out of jail the end of December of 2011. He use to send money to me for our son and he would come and visit.

Until things went bad out there and he ended up needing a place to stay! He met an older woman out there. He is in hist 20's she is in her 30's. She took him in and first he was paying rent I knew about her but I thought she was just being nice and letting him stay there, and at the time me and him were back together.

But I found out through his brother that he was sleeping with her. Just to give you some info on him he has no job, car, and just got out of jail from serving a year for forgery charges. So yes he is a felon. Last time I seen him was in April on our sons birthday. And last time I talked to him was in June.

Well his daughters bday is today and it is of course labor day. So he is in Kansas City. But he hasn't tried to message me on facebook or anything. I sent him a message he didn't even respond and he gets on there all the time.

And I talked to his P.O. and found out all he had to do is catch up his fees and he could come back to Kansas City. He lied to me and his family and said his P.O. said he can't come back until December when he is off of parole. Why is he avoiding his son. He seems to only come back for his kids bdays and holidays that's it. He has a 16 month old with me and a 10 year old daughter and 8 year old son with another woman.

Me and him have been on and off for 8 years and this woman is not the first woman he has ran off on me for. There has been so many different women. And I do regret putting up with his crap for so long. But all I want him to do is be a dad to his son! I am in the final stages of my child support order. They just need a address for him but I don't no were this woman stays. I am to the point where I wouldn't let him see him even if he wanted to.

Because he hasn't been there for anything but his first birthday. He missed his first steps his first word and all that just to lay up with some woman and her kids! I don't get it. Why is he even avoiding me I clearly don't want him anymore I just want him to be a dad!

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You cannot force anyone to do anything, and that includes be a Dad. Does he also ignore his other child(ren)?

You complain that he doesn't visit your child, but then you say, "I am to the point where I wouldn't let him see him even if he wanted to." Which is it?

He may not want to be with you; he may not want to be a Dad to your child; he may prefer to live off women and this particular woman is somewhere else. You've been "with him" for 8 years, and he has an 8 year old. Did he leave her bed to "lay up" with you?

The only way to know is to ask him.

He's done this before without a problem and probably sees no problem with continuing the same behavior.